Need help with the fear of death

I wanted to know if there is a book or sermons I can read/listen to that will help me with my fear of death. Ever since I converted 10 years ago and reverted in May, I have have struggled with the fear of death. I realize that this may stem from a lack of loving God as much as I should, and I pray everyday to love God perfectly and to rid me of this fear. TIA.

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For us Christians, death is Graduation Day

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Yes, I realize that, but I have a fear of experiencing or going through death. I know that my fear should be unreasonable in light of faith and hope, but my human nature shrinks at the thought of it.

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I will pray for you :blush:

Remind yourself that Christ is united with you as you’ve entered into the Mystery through Him in the Sacraments :heart:

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As we grow older, our bodies may become our Cross.
Jesus expects us to ‘Man up’ and carry it across the finish line.
& He will assist us in doing so !

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St. Joseph is the patron of a happy death. He’s a powerful intercessor. Start praying to him everyday, asking him to take this fear from you. He will!

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Thank you!

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If you google St. Joseph patron of a happy death you will find some good prayers and even a novena.

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Are you sure it’s death you fear or the lead up to death such as being ill with Alzheimer’s or cancer? I think the illness is scary, but death will likely be fairly easy.

Death is scary! It’s just impossible to fathom and we don’t really know what it’s like to die and what comes after. I’m not sure if I fear the idea of ceasing to exist more or the idea of an afterlife, be it heaven or hell or something entirely different. The unknown is scary especially since it’s just so different that what we experience when we are alive and yet something we all must go through. Maybe just try not to think too much about it since it will just make the anxiety and fear worse

I’ve thought about that as well, but I think it is death itself

It might help to know if you are young. I can say, as a 53 year old, death gets less and less scary each year. Have you heard of very old seniors who pray to die each night because they want to go home to the Lord? I keep these people in mind. Life is pleasant, but it has so many difficulties that I think of death as a well- deserved break from those difficulties. However, I also thought I wouldn’t have to work in heaven.

Now, somebody has told me that’s not true. We will have to pray for the souls on earth when we’re in heaven. The work never ends!

I’m 39, but I’ve been struggling with this fear since I was 29. I feel away for skinniest two years by living in the world, but I reverted because of covid. I thank God for using covid to bring me back to Him. But as I pray and confess my sins and do deeper examinations of conscious and confess all I can remember, death is at the forefront of my mind.

I believe in the afterlife and have no doubts that God exists, but the fact that one day I will experience this scares me. I do believe that covid has played a great part in my fear, since this is what made me get my act together. I just have to keep praying and trusting in the Lord.

I also think of His passion and that He subjected Himself to death for our sake, and think if God endured it, why can’t I. But I just think that this is my cross I have to bear.

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It’s normal and human to have some fear of death. The amount of fear varies person to person and can also be affected by what else is going on in their life. Obviously if you’re in the middle of a pandemic, or you have just had a loved one die (especially suddenly), or you’ve just had a close brush with death such as a narrow escape from a disaster, death may be more in the forefront of your mind.

I agree with praying to St. Joseph. I also found going to Adoration helped me when I was going through a phase of being very anxious about death. The Divine Mercy prayer “Jesus, I Trust in You” is also good.

If it is really taking over your mind, please also consider getting some mental health counseling help.

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My grandpa once said to me " I can have a family reunion in a phone booth." I’m now 53 and boy does what he said hit home. I no longer have grandparents, a father, or even many aunts and uncles. My wife and I even lost a child due to a miscarriage. For me, I think with age you see death so much you get conditioned to the fear, it just becomes a natural part of life. When I was younger I wanted to live as long as Moses, but as I’ve gotten older I realize maybe that’s not such a grand idea after all lol. My everything hurts from years of hard work, I grow tired of fighting the same battles with sin, there is indeed a reason they call it resting in peace. There just comes a point of transition, a surrendering to our Lord, here i am Lord.

And just look at you, your fear made you turn to the Lord, not run away from Him. He gave you a cross because He loves you and knew it would draw you to Him. John 6:44 is for you…

“No one can come to me unless the Father who sent me draws them, and I will raise them up at the last day.”

Try and see your fear as a gift from the Lord, embrace it and grow in your relationship with Christ. May God bless and keep you!

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Pray. I am in an occupation where things could go bad very quickly, I could be severely injured or get killed. I deal with it by prayer, constant prayer with the Our Father prayer being the most used one. “Thy will be done” we pray, there is nothing we can do about what could happen.

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Further to what another poster said, consider seeing your doctor about this for a referral to counselling (or however it’s done in your country). There is no shame in checking out other causes for a fear of death than spiritual ones.

Furthermore keep up the praying and trusting in God. Remember its progressive and takes time to build up. You can also consecrate yourself to Jesus through both Mary and Joseph. One at a time both practices are highly effective in helping one advance in the spiritual life. They usually take 33 days each. There are countless ways of Marian consecration and I only know of one book on consecrating oneself to Joseph. Well worth the effort to do both.
It may also be worth your while to concentrate in your prayers and meditation more on the risen Christ than the Passion while you come to terms with this fear and of course ask God to heal you. Give him this fear in your prayer and ask for healing. You’ll probably need to do that countless times, if you are anything like me who keeps on forgetting and taking things back. God bless.

Thank you all for your suggestions.

I do believe that my fear is a little too high, it isn’t that it’s always in the forefront of my mind. It creeps in when I am alone and start thinking about the possibility of dying soon or at times when I am praying. Honestly, I think covid has exacerbated my fear. I do not want to despair or lose faith and I have been praying to cope with this. I am not to the point of becoming anxious or having paralyzing fear, but when the thought creeps in I get that fear response in the pit of my stomach and worry.

While I have not had any family members who have died from covid, my brother and his family have been infected and recovered.

I just find it funny that I have devotion to the poor souls in purgatory and pray for them daily and offer sacrifices for them and yet here I am scared of this passage of life. I realize that the saints looked forward to death because they knew they were going to be with the Lord and that brought them great comfort. I desire to have the same certitude and desire to be with Him for all eternity.

As others have said, it is very natural to have a fear of death. I doubt if anyone gets over such fear completely in this life, so don’t be too hard on yourself. It seems like a devotion to the Holy Souls, as well as St. Joseph, would be really effective against this fear.
I don’t know how old you are, but at my age I now see that getting older starts to mean you (in some way) start to live with one foot on earth and one in the afterlife already. Many friends and relatives are now dead and you know they are waiting for you and you long to see them. Lots of friends on the other side! It makes the thought of death so much easier.
I think I’d only be terrified of death if this life is all their is. Of course, many people today believe that–I don’t know how they handle it. Perhaps whenever a fear of death enters your mind you can offer it to Our Lord for such people, and thus turn your fear into something extremely positive.

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Yep. I tend to think old age can be scarier than death. :smiley:

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