Hello. I am new here.
I thought what is the “Catholic Answer” to my problem here? hence this place “Catholic Answers”. Hope this place can be of some help. I am wondering if anyone can shed some light on my situation here. Thank you in advance for all the input, and for taking your time to read my post below.
I have been married to the same man for nearly 20 years and we have 2 teenagers. I am a Stay At Home Mom by decision, after nearly 10 years of working in a hot career, earning most the money for the family. I couldn’t take it any longer, physically or emotionally, and knew God was calling me to live my vocation of motherhood finally, which is what I have been doing, joyfully now for about 10 years. Trouble is, my husband is a pitiful provider, and has changed jobs so many times I can’t even keep track. He leaves me penniless and destitute much of the time, and gives me hardly any funds to subsist. We clearly do not have enough to live, yet he does nothing about securing a better paying job, or moving us elsewhere, yet continually borrows money from his parents. I guess he expected he’d always have me to lift him out of his Godly responsibilities of being the provider. This has, needless to say, caused a lot of turbulence in our marriage, and a rift. He said it’s OK if I quit work, etc., but since doing so, it has been utter chaos. I feel like I am married to a 16 year old boy, shunning responsibility, maintaining no control over the home, and etc. We have re-financed our home a few times just to have enough money to live, and do not have hardly any debt. But he has a hard time even thinking ahead to the future. I feel my children especially now, better late than never, need their mom in the home. For I have always known it’s a mom’s job to raise and rear the children, not someone elses. I let someone else take over this job for way too long, and now having learned better late than never, it’s my turn. Trouble is, my hubby does not know what to do.
Yes, we’ve had counseling, so do not suggest this. It does no good. I need some good solid advice on I guess how can I make my husband realize the full extent of his manly/fatherly responsibilities and how can I, a wife and mom, subsist here on this tentative lifestyle? I’m a nervous wreck. I know God provides, He always has, and always will, but I’m just so tired. Need some advice.
What should I do?
Thanks ever so much for any good soul who replies to this post.