my mother keeps telling me to kill myself as that will solve a lot of people’s problems including her’s; she started ranting again yesterday.
i moved back in with her on losing my job, i didn’t want to but as a result in a neighbourhood where you hear several gun shots every single day, i thought it would at least be better than that. but i am under a different type of stress (verbal, emotional, psychological abuse) several times every day from her.
i am being put out again soon, just a matter of time. i need a job, just sent out 3 more resumes, and have been unsuccessful so far. a friend has volunteered to help me with my rent but as i no longer have a key to her house i cannot leave the house unsecured to walk and look.
her father was an abuser which is why their family split up, she is the same, the last time she dared to me a fight and hit me (separate occassions) was when i was over 25 years old.
i am on my face before God and need His help. i need peace.