Neighbor planning to abort her baby


One of my neighbors and I are starting to build a friendship, but it’s still in the early stages. She told me today that she is pregnant and is going to get an abortion. Her two main reasons are concern for her and the baby’s health due to issues during her last pregnancy, and the fact that she has two kids and says that’s enough for her. I could tell that she’s really shaken up about the situation, but she also didn’t really ask for my advice or opinion. Does anyone have any advice for how to approach the situation delicately? I feel like I can’t just sit by and do nothing, but I also feel like I can’t push the situation.

That is horrible. Do you know her well enough to ask her some questions? About baby development and what she thinks abortion is?

Perhaps God has put you in this situation for a reason. I think you know what you have to at least have to do.

How long from now is she planning the abortion?

It seems to me she may value your friendship … enough to tell you about her plans. That is something one doesn’t go broadcasting to just anyone.

God Speed!

Are you familiar with any crisis pregnancy places in your community? Could you talk to one of them and then try - lovingly - to convince her to visit one and say you’ll go with her for support?

So sad:( look abortion is a devastating decision shes panicky right now if she just found out shes pregnant, if you choose to do this please do it carefully and with compasssion listen to her be there for her ive had friends and relatives who have aborted legally and illegally women having abortions or planning too are vulnerable and shattered normally they need compassion not preaching. God bless you and good luck ill say a prayer for your new friend god bless her and change her heart.

And if she does do it please please check on her women worldwide die of unsafe, legal,illegal and botched abortions, and homemade ones or the after effects daily pray she wont but dont ostracize her if she does pray for her

Praying for her and you.


I think that despite she didn’t ask for an opinion you need to state that you don’t agree with it, that abortion is wrong and that she is killing her own child. I agree that you should probably refer her to a pregnancy help center and offer her your help to reach one. She probably will get upset but… Who likes to be corrected specially in our culture that teaches us to be selfish and to let everyone else to do what they want without measuring consequences, but you have to say something. Now there are ways to say things. Be sure tot all in a friendly tone and say it in a way that reflects that you care about her and tell her that you understand her situation but you don’t think is the best way and offer her help tonseek a better solution. I’ll be praying for you and her.

I believe you have an absolute obligation to try to prevent this abortion. I would first approach it with positives…perhaps reminding her of the gifts she has in her two children, how they are each unique and remind her of her love for them. I would also mention to her she has a choice of putting her baby up for adoption, rather than going through the trauma of abortion. Is she married? If so, I suspect she may balk at the last suggestion.

I assume the neighbour is not Catholic - does she know you are?

As a Catholic, I’m sure you know the motivations for an abortion matter nought in so far as the morality of the act is concerned: abortion = murder = always wrong.

But proffering that statement (or anything like it) will very likely achieve nothing good at this point. Instead, I would seek to establish some kind of understanding of her situation and build from there. What “health” issues is she talking about? What struggles lead her to figure 2 children is her limit? Can you help her cope in any way? At some point, you may be in a position to quietly expose your beliefs about why we cannot endorse abortion - that may be listened to and taken more to heart if it comes from someone who has demonstrated care, concern, friendship and compassion.

Be prepared for the reality that she may go ahead with the abortion. Do not get caught into some crazy idea that it is your duty to use all means to prevent the abortion and you are some how partially culpable if you don’t.

And if she does go ahead, offer her every comfort and support afterwards.

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