News article: "'I hate you': victim's message in court to Catholic priest jailed for sexually abusing six children"


#1

In court one of his victims said: “I hate you. There is no one to blame but you,” while another described how her family had all been “married and baptised by a disgusting monster”.

Judge Catherine Tulk told McDermott he had “turned down so many opportunities to admit your wrongdoing”.

She noted the irony that one of the central tenets of the Catholic Church was confession.


#2

I have to admit, after closely following a local trial of a local priest who did some horrid things, it is not just the physical victims that are hurt here. But everyone. I find incredible hatred in some of these things. And not only do I think it is understandable, but I also think in many cases it is right and just.


#3

As much as it hurts,is it really right and just to hate? Arnt we asked to forgive our enemies ,don’t they also belong to God ?
Anger is justified,hate begets more hate and spreads the bad that’s already been done ,increases the damage :confused:


#4

I hate that which is evil.


#5

Evil acts yes.Who knows the soul of a person but God and him/herself at the time of death.


#6

It’s understandable; it’s neither “right” nor “just” to hate a person. You can certainly hate what they did.

By your reasoning, it would have been “right” and “just” for Jesus and his followers to hate all the people who had a hand in crucifying Jesus. They didn’t.
They hated the act that was committed - but not the persons who did it.

As hard as it is to swallow, Jesus loves child molesters just as much as he loves everybody else. He hates what they do. Not them personally.


#7

I can’t presume to know how it feels to be a victim of this type of abuse so It’s difficult for me to understand the hurt they feel. I will say that holding on to hatred for that long, considering the abuse took place in the 1970s, is unhealthy for body, mind and soul. It just eats away at a person. 1 John 3:15 says anyone who hates hates a brother or sister is a murderer. The harm is as much or more done to the person doing the hating. Forgiveness is best for everyone no matter how difficult it is in the worst circumstances.


#8

I’m sure God would have some understanding for/ mercy on a victim or their close loved one having difficulty in forgiving.
He would not say it was right or just for them to act unforgiving though.
Their emotional state might be a mitigation of their sin of lack of forgiveness.

This isn’t a new issue. I found a copy of Sacred Heart Messenger at my mom’s. It’s over 100 years old and probably belonged to my grandma or great-grandma. The first story I read in it was about an elderly Irish mom’s difficulty in forgiving the soldiers who tortured and hung her son in front of her eyes, just for fun. Of course the ending (this being a Catholic magazine) has her forgiving the soldier, hiding him from an angry mob of her neighbors, and then dying in her sleep in her rocking chair with a happy smile on her face as she is reunited with her son in Heaven.

Forgiveness is very hard. We have to make our best effort anyway but it’s easier to talk about someone else doing it than do it ourselves in an awful situation.


#9

I would perhaps be careful on this subject. Yes, we are called to forgive. But we can’t forgive for someone else, and it is very easy to sit back and say how someone else ought to forgive. Especially in a situation like this, where priests of our own church have done such crimes, and many of our own leaders covered for them. Talking too easily of how the victims ought to forgive can easily come across as more of the same sort of dismissal.


#10

What else would they publish? The media publishes what will sell and having a victim say ‘I have come to forgive’ is NOT what sells

Only God can judge people’s heart. However, in a sense, I think it is goods that the media shows the hate these people have. It sends a message these behaviours are to stop. To let abusers off the hook will just create more abuse


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