Newsflash


#1

If you don't want a bunch of commentary and opinions, some of which you will most definitely NOT agree with, don't post your personal business on an internet forum and ask people for their opinions.

Rant over.


#2

But 1ke, if we do this, where is the fun??


#3

[quote="1ke, post:1, topic:242951"]
If you don't want a bunch of commentary and opinions, some of which you will most definitely NOT agree with, don't post your personal business on an internet forum and ask people for their opinions.

Rant over.

[/quote]

Love.


#4

+1 for 1ke!

:thumbsup:


#5

[quote="1ke, post:1, topic:242951"]
If you don't want a bunch of commentary and opinions, some of which you will most definitely NOT agree with, don't post your personal business on an internet forum and ask people for their opinions.

Rant over.

[/quote]

I agree.

Isn't the point of internet forum use to solicit a variety of opinions in order to gain a more complete insight into an issue?


#6

But...but...what if i'm offended?


#7

I wonder if there should be a sticky on this. Recently it seems like a lot of posters are describing family members and/or friends in ways that make them sound mentally ill, or physically ill and in some sort of crisis. However no one can diagnose over the Internet. I'm starting to get nervous when I see some threads to the effect of, my spouse is a major problem. Sometimes I can't tell if the person is in crisis, or if they are blowing off steam, or if something else is going on.

A lot of people including me have shared personal information about past events and/or current events/situations that are not crises or major urgent/immediate decision points, but sometimes I see requests for advice that go beyond what CAF can provide.

I would also like to see a sticky or something about NFP, to explain it, the Church's view on it and abstinence and ABC, and the limits of posting about NFP so that people don't go into requesting medical information.

For example someone may say, is it OK to get a hysterectomy as an option, and to readers on CAF it may not be clear if that meets "double effect" if that is the right term, when in fact IRL a doctor may have said this is mandatory surgery and the poster has not accepted that yet. (This is not aimed at anyone, I'm just saying I also wonder whether people are always summarizing their doctors' input correctly.)

Some basic information on NFP somewhere might save a lot of arguments. I don't think it should be eliminated as a topic but the same disagreements seem to come up over and over again.


#8

OK, that’s not an empty rant, but the converse is also true.

If you give a free opinion about someone else’s life, you don’t have a right to expect that your efforts will be appreciated, even if your opinion was solicited. That isn’t even realistic, even if you’re inarguably correct. (Probably especially if you’re inarguably correct!)

“How does this make me look? Be honest.”
“It makes you look like a cow, only in pink instead of black and white. Oh, wait, except that a cow’s bag matches what’s on her feet, so that’s a problem, too. There is nothing that would look natural with those shoes.”
“That was pretty rude!!”
“Hey, did you want my honest opinion, or not?”

:wink: :smiley:

And no, it isn’t just about being charitable, as important as that is. Sometimes the truth hurts so much that there is not a single way to tell the unvarnished truth that won’t sound as blunt to the recipient as the above would.


#9

[quote="monicatholic, post:6, topic:242951"]
But...but...what if i'm offended?

[/quote]

Then I'll post twice on your thread just to spite you. ;)


#10

Now you’re insulting my shoes? Catholics are so judgmental.


#11

I'm already spited. Disks read the remark about my shoes?


#12

[quote="EasterJoy, post:8, topic:242951"]
OK, that's not an empty rant, but the converse is also true.

If you give a free opinion about someone else's life, you don't have a right to expect that your efforts will be appreciated, even if your opinion was solicited. That isn't even realistic, even if you're inarguably correct. (Probably especially if you're inarguably correct!)

"How does this make me look? Be honest."
"It makes you look like a cow, only in pink instead of black and white. Oh, wait, except that a cow's bag matches what's on her feet, so that's a problem, too. There is nothing that would look natural with those shoes."
"That was pretty rude!!"
"Hey, did you want my honest opinion, or not?"

;) :D

And no, it isn't just about being charitable, as important as that is. Sometimes the truth hurts so much that there is not a single way to tell the unvarnished truth that won't sound as blunt to the recipient as the above would.

[/quote]

I think the more sensitive the poster's situation, the more likely he/she may be upset by correct but blunt advice. And even advice that sounds tactful let's say to me as I'm writing it may not come across that way. That's why a sticky saying something about: if you post about personal, sensitive family issues you need to be prepared for feedback might be helpful.

Examples from family life that I have seen are: separation/divorce, past abuse, interfaith dating, and especially issues related to NFP which often involve discussions of risky pregnancy and/or parental exhaustion. A calm general overview about NFP might really help.


#13

[quote="silentstar, post:12, topic:242951"]
I think the more sensitive the poster's situation, the more likely he/she may be upset by correct but blunt advice. And even advice that sounds tactful let's say to me as I'm writing it may not come across that way. That's why a sticky saying something about: if you post about personal, sensitive family issues you need to be prepared for feedback might be helpful.

Examples from family life that I have seen are: separation/divorce, past abuse, interfaith dating, and especially issues related to NFP which often involve discussions of risky pregnancy and/or parental exhaustion. A calm general overview about NFP might really help.

[/quote]

Exactly. Charity and tact are desirable, rudeness can't be allowed to pass, but comments that the OP will interpret as tactful or helpful cannot be guaranteed.

1ke is right: Start threads about your personal life accordingly.


#14

[quote="monicatholic, post:10, topic:242951"]
Now you're insulting my shoes? Catholics are so judgmental.

[/quote]

Some colors and shoe designs violate Natural Law. There are certain things the Good Lord never intended a foot (or an eye) to endure. People try to deny it these days, they want their feet to do their will instead of God's will, and that is why the podiatrists will never run out of business.

;)


#15

:rotfl: love it!


#16

I can’t be sure, but I think you’re going to h-e-double-hockey-sticks.


#17

Now, I know you started this thread to vent, but really...what are you trying to do? Are you judging those asking for help or are you making fun of them....hmm, well are you? I'm sure I won't like the answer you give me and I'll let you know that you have upset me! Are you a troll? :p

I can't be sure, but I think you're going to h-e-double-hockey-sticks

Oh dear, the Catholics on this site that think they know so much...:tsktsk::D


#18

[quote="1ke, post:1, topic:242951"]
If you don't want a bunch of commentary and opinions, some of which you will most definitely NOT agree with, don't post your personal business on an internet forum and ask people for their opinions.

Rant over.

[/quote]

As a liberal neo-traditionalist Catholic with moderate leanings, I think I find your post somehow insulting.

What do you think?


#19

The problem with 1ke is that he has this nasty habit of posting the plain facts concerning what the Church teaches on the subject, instead of posting conjectures that can be written off as nothing more than his opinion.

When one is upset, it is not usually pleasant to have some guy who actually knows what he’s talking about come along and smother your wishful thinking with unpleasant facts.

Rant all you like, but no good deed goes unpunished and messengers get taken out and shot all of the time, 1ke. It’s a vale of tears.


#20

[quote="EasterJoy, post:14, topic:242951"]
Some colors and shoe designs violate Natural Law. There are certain things the Good Lord never intended a foot (or an eye) to endure. People try to deny it these days, they want their feet to do their will instead of God's will, and that is why the podiatrists will never run out of business.

;)

[/quote]

That is nothing but your OPINION.

Please back that up by referencing some Church documents or scriptural passages.
:cool:

  • Reg.

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