how can i use NFP to avoid and be in good standing w/the church? arent we all supposed to be open to life 100%
The Church allows the use of NFP. It differs from artificial birth control because you don’t interfere with the sex act, you simply choose to abstain at certain times.
The Church doesn’t teach that you have to have sex every time you are fertile.
Whether it’s the time for you to have a child is to be prayerfully determined by you and your spouse. You have to decide what is right for your particular situation. But if you do decide that it’s not the time to have a child, the Church only allows you to achieve this by abstaining, not by interfering with the biology of sex in one way or another. And as long as you don’t interfere by either modifying your hormones for the purpose of not getting pregnant, or using barrier methods you remain open to life.
Do you own a copy of the Catechism? If not, bookmark the site I will link you too. Begin to read it and learn what our Faith does and does not teach. It is easy to read - by 6th grade my son was carrying around his own copy to school!
Here is the teaching on spacing of births:
**2370 **Periodic continence, that is, the methods of birth regulation based on self-observation and the use of infertile periods, is in conformity with the objective criteria of morality. These methods respect the bodies of the spouses, encourage tenderness between them, and favor the education of an authentic freedom. In contrast, “every action which, whether in anticipation of the conjugal act, or in its accomplishment, or in the development of its natural consequences, proposes, whether as an end or as a means, to render procreation impossible” is intrinsically evil:
Thus the innate language that expresses the total reciprocal self-giving of husband and wife is overlaid, through contraception, by an objectively contradictory language, namely, that of not giving oneself totally to the other. This leads not only to a positive refusal to be open to life but also to a falsification of the inner truth of conjugal love, which is called upon to give itself in personal totality. . . . The difference, both anthropological and moral, between contraception and recourse to the rhythm of the cycle . . . involves in the final analysis two irreconcilable concepts of the human person and of human sexuality.
would nfp be good to avoid if we haven’t gotten pregnant ever? im sure im infertile since we haven’t gotten pregnant in all the yrs we’ve been married, i don’t know if we should even waste our time learning nfp
I don’t know that anyone could answer this for you. It’s a personal thing. Basically, it just needs to be for a **just reason **that you’re using NFP to avoid. The problem is that your just reasons may not be mine and vice versa. I think this is rather unfortunate, personally…I’m a fan of objective standards when it comes to right and wrong (just like the Church has been, historicaly) instead of vague guidelines that can be twisted any which way. It’s helpful to remember that you can fool yourself, but you can’t fool God. He won’t be mocked.
But…it is what it is. It’s up to you to determine what is or isn’t a just reason to use NFP to avoid. So I guess, the best thing to do would be to pray with your husband about this, and maybe seek some advice from your confessor or parish priest.
Great explanation in plain language! Thanks.