NFP-the positive side


#1

I know my husband really loves me, because he’s willing to wait for me and he wants what’s best for us spiritually.

Sex is never taken for granted.
Pax Christi,
Ann


#2

I know my husband really loves me, because he’s willing to wait for me and he wants what’s best for us spiritually.

Sex is never taken for granted.
Pax Christi,
Ann

Hi Ann.
That is wonderful! I’m very happy that you and your husband have such a great relationship.
I hope he has an easier time in abstaining than some of us here.

I too am very willing to wait for my wife and have only the best intentions for our spiritual life, but the abstinence is very difficult and is a cross to bear for me, and a few other guys here…and in my experience, a vast number of Catholic married men.

Some (unasked for) advice:
Keep the communication open and have him speak of his feelings on this as much as he needs to, to make sure there is nothing he is suppressing. Communication is very, very important in this!

In Christ,
PM.


#3

Ah, he doesn’t talk about his feelings much. He’s more into talking about work or what he’s been doing lately, not a lot of talk about what he’s feeling.
Peace in Christ,
Ann


#4

Does anyone have anything good to say about NFP? Anything?

Pax Christi,
Ann


#5

When we began our journey with NFP ten years ago it cause a major change in our intimacy in a very positive way. We learned how beautiful being together can be with out the selfishness that BC creates. We get that period of excitement and anticipation every month. And following God’s will has brought so many graces and blessings to our marriage.

Something to keep in mind, although I understand what your saying Ann -please be sensitive to those who still struggle with NFP. I don’t think they love their spouses less because they struggle.


#6

I have tons!!! NFP has improved both our intercouse and prayer life. It has challenged me to ain a deeper knowledge of this Church teaching in order to understand the why…and I have come to a new understading ofthe importance if sex in a marriage (much to my husbands pleasant suprise). The truth is beautiful. I value my body and fertility more. I could go on (and maybe will when I have a chance).

Oh! PS. I am now confident that I can teac our childen about chastity and purity and respect in a way ha will prvent them from making the mistakes that I did!


#7

NFP is the best thing that could have ever happened to us. :thumbsup:

My husband calls phase 2 his “time of reprieve”… :wink: :smiley:


#8

I’m confused…did she attack anyone? ( I miss alot of things though…mommy brain I’ve been told)


#9

Was I insensitive to anyone? I certainly didin’t mean to be. What did I say?
Pax Christi,
Ann


#10

No, not attack. I think the phrase *I know my husband really loves me, because he’s willing to wait for me and he wants what’s best for us spiritually *especially the *I know my husband really loves me *part may sting those who are struggling with the waiting part. Right now several people have been sharing that on the forum. It may come across as though who struggle with waiting must love their spouses less. Maybe I’m reading too much into it. I just don’t want there to be hurt feelings.


#11

Good point…

But on the other hand, I do understand why this thread was started… to not DISCOURAGE folks from trying NFP…
(did I get that right?)
Because there are a few negative threads on NFP…

I guess we have to have balance… prayers for those trying… and understanding that NFP can be really great too.


#12

Hey, those who are struggling (with NFP) are still waiting too, right? That must mean that they really love their spouse and their Faith also.
Pax Christi,
Ann


#13

Exavtly: NFP is so good for marriages–at least that’s how I see it.
Pax Christi,
Ann


#14

it is not likely to cause cancer down the road in life…
other than that i see it differently than what others do But i wont cut it down here or promote it either…

hows that?


#15

I definitely would not want anyone to be discouraged to try NFP. NFP has been a huge blessing in our marriage. Besides as faithful Catholics if there is serious reason to avoid pregnancy what other option is there? I think NFP has really spiced up things - I’m the only one of my close friends not complaining about the sex life :stuck_out_tongue: (all other use some form of bc). We’re like newlyweds every month.:extrahappy:

I love not have artificial chemicals running through my body. And a condom forget that that is awful.:eek: Nothing like being intimate with something that feels like plastic wrap.

I think the new discussions on the forum have opened up the fact the NFP isn’t always a breeze. But those things we struggle with, those things that are more difficult can be a source of so much grace as well. And that is a positive.

Living the way God calls us to is always a positive -even when it’s hard.

So on that positive note I :heart: being with my hubby -the way God intended.


#16

Katieq, Em_in_FL, I can only hope that one day I and my wife are where you two are. I am quite envious. katieq, you mentioned that sex is better since you’ve approached it differently in marriage; Em_in_FL, you mentioned one time that there is such a thing as healthy, fun, Catholic sex; I guess it is out there if your ph 2 is a time of reprieve, especially for your husband, the lucky guy!

The positive of NFP is that it does work for achieving or avoiding pregnancy. We have four wonderful children, all the fruits of NFP. We have not gotten to the spiritual level of it as you both have, nor really even the apparently very satisfying physical side. I have struggled with other life factors and have explained them elsewhere, and I wonder if there may well also be biological reasons I have not discovered, but for me, there is nothing emotionally or physically to look forward to in ph 3; it is just not that enjoyable any more for a number of reasons. So why do I struggle with NFP and Church teachings then? Maybe NFP is easy to blame for what is going on, or not going on. I do believe that since I have had to try to shut down my urges and our past behaviors, and since the chances of our getting to even enjoy ph 3 are slim, then I just do not anticipate anything - if there is nothing to anticipate, then I won’t miss it when it does not happen, you know? My wife gets somewhat excited when it rolls around; I’m kind of like, “Oh, OK.” But it definitely impacts overall intimacy and I think it has had a literal physical impact as well.


#17

Indeed. Very well said.
Pax Christi,
Ann


#18

Yes we love NFP. My husband jokes that we have more intimate moments with NFP than he ever had in his previous invalid, contracepting “marriage.” Since we have been able to really turn over our sexuality to God, we find ourselves on the same page with each other’s sexual desire.

I will make one major qualifier though. We are a little older…mid-thirties. Neither of us has the sex drive we had in our 20s. I really sympathize with those who struggle with abstinence. We both struggled with it outside of marriage. I wish I had studied the teachings on TOB (Theology of the Body from Pope John Paul the Great) when I was in my teens and early 20s.

It has made the single biggest impact on how I view my own body and that of my spouse. NFP is even easier to understand and embrace in the context of TOB.


#19

I would actually like to apologize to everyone. I do not mean to bring others down and feel I am only coming across as a complainer. Nor am I looking for sympathy or such. It is very much a faith journey, and I’m searching to see where others are along this mysterious path…

God bless to all.


#20

A little older? Mid-thirties? Ouch! Gotcha beat by a decade! :slight_smile:


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