No one told me we weren't supposed to hold hands!

So, I was just browsing through the Forums, when I came across this response from Father:

It says we are NOT supposed to hold hand’s during the Lord’s Prayer? I had no idea. :eek:

I have NEVER been to a parish where people didn’t hold hands. Occasionally I have been next to someone who didn’t, but I just figured they had a cold, were shy, whatever… I live in Texas, is this a Southern custom? Even at Spanish masses I have been to people hold hands (probably more there than in the English masses).

So, are we NOT supposed to hold hands really? I don’t know how I missed this my whole life! :shrug:

In Poland, where I first started regularly going mass, (I am a convert) nobody held hands during the “Ojcze Nasz” (Our Father).

Holding hands is not in the rubrics for the mass. This is a custom that seems to have slipped in to American churches from Protestantism.

(FYI - the response wasn’t from a priest - not that it makes much difference.)

But you’re not NOT supposed to hold hands either.

If holding the hands of a spouse or child or parent or friend is beneficial to you during the Our Father (or at any other time) please feel free to do so.

There’s no prohibition.

Good manners and common sense would dictate that we don’t grab someone else’s hand.

Or from families that hold hands.

Like families do.


Basically, its not a part of the rubrics, so it shouldn’t be treated as though it is, but there is nothing wrong with holding hands with others during the Our Father if you find it helpful.

I personally do not hold hands during it ever as I think the misconception that it is a part of the rubrics has crept into many parishes and this is my way of trying to help combat that misconception. But again, it is not required that you not hold hands during the Our Father if such is helpful for you.

Personally I oppose any hand-holding at all during the Pater Noster. The fundamental problem I see isn’t with the hand-holding per se, but rather the fact that it mimics the priest’s hand gestures. The laity should not do that. The celebrant functions as the prayer leader for the congregation, yes, but his primary role is to be divinely-ordained priest that is offering Christ as sacrifice on the altar. To mimic the gestures in a priestly blessing is to imply that the laity can mimic that function, which we cannot.

It’s the same reason why turning extraordinary ministers of Holy Communion into ordinary ministers is bad.

I don’t remember in which episode, but on CAL several weeks ago, Fr. Serpa said that holding hands is not in the rubrics, so one doesn’t have to do it. He also warned against refusing someone’s hand because it could be misconstrued as being rude.

(I am paraphrasing Fr. Serpa.)

What’s this? Reasonableness and common sense on CAF? Hell musta done froze over.

Families are holding hands now? :eek:
What’s next, hugs, kisses, singing of songs?
We live in a dangerous world!!

It is not part of the rubrics. It is fine for families/friends to spontaneously hold hands, but when the entire congregation starts to hold hands and it becomes the norm, then it, in my opinion, becomes an illicit addition to the Mass.

Some argue that is represents the unity of the Church, but that is already represented by us reciting the Pater Noster together.

I personally refuse anyone’s hand. I am not being rude. I just do not want to participate in a gesture that hasn’t been approved by the Holy See or the Conference of Bishops.

God bless you. :blessyou:


I think people should pay their taxes, doesn’t mean I want to see them filling out their forms during Mass.

sorry it was a poor attempt at humor:o

Well, I’m sure that Mary, the other women and John didn’t fill out their tax forms at the Crucifixion, but they may have held hands.

Okay. Pretty sure they weren’t also doing that to mimic the gestures of our High Priest, though.

You oppose ordination?



I’ve actually always wanted to hold hands/raise hands with others when saying the Lord’s Prayer at Mass. :blush: That,however, has never happened. I think it shows unity. :slight_smile:

Did I say that? :shrug: The Church has spoken many times about the over-use of EMHC.

I don’t understand how holding my wife’s hand down by our side “mimics the priest’s hand gestures.” The priest a) isn’t holding anyone’s hand, and b) has his hands outstretched at this point of the Mass.

Is hand-holding during the Our Father still a banned topic? I don’t see a sticky, so maybe not…

Anyway, this is not really a topic that’s worth getting too worked up about. There’s nothing in the rubrics specifying that we should hold hands at that time (or any time). But then there’s nothing in the rubrics specifying we should not, either.

I personally don’t care for the practice, and I can think of some good theological reasons not to. But it’s not worth snubbing someone over.

There are plenty of hills to dig in your feet and die on. But this ain’t the one for me. :stuck_out_tongue:

It’s not just a southern thing, though. I’ve seen it happen further north. Most of the parishes i have attended on a regular basis don’t do it, though.

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