Not sure what to do about this. What would you do?


#1

Here it goes.

My Grandmother passed away this past August 4th.

She had a total of 12 children. One of the children, a boy we'll just refer to him as "Ted" really
gave her a run for her money.

Ted was a handful. In trouble a lot with the law. He was so much trouble that he had to be put in a foster home. He did time in jail as well when he got older(adult).

Ted did get married to a lady we'll refer to as "Maggie". Ted and Maggie had a son we'll refer to as "Josh". Ted and Maggie's marriage didn't last because of all the trouble with the law.
Maggie left Ted and took Josh with her.

Our family never really got to see Josh. In fact I think he was something like 17 the last time my grandmother saw him and that was the first time she saw him since he was like 4 I do believe.

Now about 2 years ago I get a friend request on facebook from a woman we"ll refer to as "Peggy". Turned out that Peggy was Josh's wife. I communicated with them a lot through facebook.

I was planning my wedding in July 2010 and they were supposed to come.

On February 14th 2010 I commented on Peggy's status on facebook "glad you had a great dinner, hope to see you this summer at the wedding".

Well. This got ugly. Josh's Mother Maggie flipped out and got in a big fight with Peggy over facebook. Unfortunately I didn't get to see any of the posts but Maggie felt that Peggy only had all of us on there(meaning everyone in my family) to deliberately hurt Josh's stepfather who we'll refer to as "Fred" and that she couldn't believe that they would consider visiting us and hurting him like that.

So basically I get a message from Peggy explaining this and that she had to delete all of us from facebook including my 1st cousin (josh's half brother) who we'll refer to as "John".
That she hoped I understood why. I replied explaining that we wouldn't want to interfere but that I didn't understand why Maggie would flip out like that because we realize that although Ted was Josh's biological Father that Fred was the one that brought him up and that we'd never ever discriminate.

I sent them a wedding invitation anyway. No response. I tried to send Josh an email but either I typed the wrong one or her ignored it. I sent an xmas card in dec 2010 no response.

Josh's wife does have facebook still. John I think gave up with his attempts a while ago.

My question is, should I bother contacting them to let them know that out Grandmother passed away?


#2

*[size=]Yes! * Do not let this situation keep you from doing the right thing.[/size]


#3

Yes !!! They are family and should know..


#4

I agree. Let them know. What they do with the information is up to them.


#5

I also say tell them. It's the right thing to do and it won't do any harm to tell them (but it could cause harm not telling them).


#6

what would I do? Delete facebook. :)


#7

[quote="jazzy0710, post:1, topic:254171"]
Here it goes.

[/quote]

I would say: forget all those long stories. Act as if you would be inviting Jesus Christ.
The person has got one of 2 answers to give: Yes or No.

And you will be in peace. You did not re-acted to all the situation. You acted as a free and independent an Christian person who do not re-act to the acts of others but act as you want and seem fit .


#8

[quote="jazzy0710, post:1, topic:254171"]

My question is, should I bother contacting them to let them know that out Grandmother passed away?

[/quote]

That's a lot of drama. But yes, try and contact them about the grandmother's death. Up to them if they will do anything about this and get in touch with you afterwards or not.


#9

Sorry for your loss. Always, love, forgiveness, kindness. It occured to me that your grandmothers death may be a catalyst for restarting the relationship. Death has a way of focusing te survivors on what is truly important in life. Think of it as a going away present to you from your grandmother.


#10

[quote="jazzy0710, post:1, topic:254171"]

My question is, should I bother contacting them to let them know that out Grandmother passed away?

[/quote]

yes send the information with whatever contact information you have. You are not responsible for what they do with that information.


#11

[quote="jazzy0710, post:1, topic:254171"]
Here it goes.

My Grandmother passed away this past August 4th.

She had a total of 12 children. One of the children, a boy we'll just refer to him as "Ted" really
gave her a run for her money.

Ted was a handful. In trouble a lot with the law. He was so much trouble that he had to be put in a foster home. He did time in jail as well when he got older(adult).

Ted did get married to a lady we'll refer to as "Maggie". Ted and Maggie had a son we'll refer to as "Josh". Ted and Maggie's marriage didn't last because of all the trouble with the law.
Maggie left Ted and took Josh with her.

Yes in all honesty.

JESUS I TRUST IN YOU

jr
Our family never really got to see Josh. In fact I think he was something like 17 the last time my grandmother saw him and that was the first time she saw him since he was like 4 I do believe.

Now about 2 years ago I get a friend request on facebook from a woman we"ll refer to as "Peggy". Turned out that Peggy was Josh's wife. I communicated with them a lot through facebook.

I was planning my wedding in July 2010 and they were supposed to come.

On February 14th 2010 I commented on Peggy's status on facebook "glad you had a great dinner, hope to see you this summer at the wedding".

Well. This got ugly. Josh's Mother Maggie flipped out and got in a big fight with Peggy over facebook. Unfortunately I didn't get to see any of the posts but Maggie felt that Peggy only had all of us on there(meaning everyone in my family) to deliberately hurt Josh's stepfather who we'll refer to as "Fred" and that she couldn't believe that they would consider visiting us and hurting him like that.

So basically I get a message from Peggy explaining this and that she had to delete all of us from facebook including my 1st cousin (josh's half brother) who we'll refer to as "John".
That she hoped I understood why. I replied explaining that we wouldn't want to interfere but that I didn't understand why Maggie would flip out like that because we realize that although Ted was Josh's biological Father that Fred was the one that brought him up and that we'd never ever discriminate.

I sent them a wedding invitation anyway. No response. I tried to send Josh an email but either I typed the wrong one or her ignored it. I sent an xmas card in dec 2010 no response.

Josh's wife does have facebook still. John I think gave up with his attempts a while ago.

My question is, should I bother contacting them to let them know that out Grandmother passed away?

[/quote]


#12

I would. Just say she passed away in a gentle way and leave it at that. No need to go into any drama.


#13

Thanks everyone. I will get a hold of them. It's just said that "Josh" never ever since the age of 17 made any effort to come see my grandmother and he's now in his mid 30's. He's got 2 kids of his own and she never got to meet them. So sad.


#14

DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit www.catholic.com.