That’s a pretty extreme exagerration to say that “most” public school kids use the prom to have sex and get drunk. That makes it sound as of the prom is a ticket to a school sponsored orgy. Obviously, drinking and sex are not allowed in the prom facilities. In my experience, public school districts (from good districts, at least) do a lot to make sure the prom is safe and the rules are followed.
The adolescents who make the choice to drink and have sex on the night of the prom are more often than not making a choice they’ve
already made before. The prom is certainly not the cause of those choices.
And I strongly disagree that “most” kids make these choices in public schools. Most of them maintain the personal standards and lifestyle choices they’ve already chosen by the time their senior prom rolls around.
These are people who are right on the threshold of adulthood. They deserve to be respected, and to be acknowledged as capable of making the right choices for themselves. They deserve to be allowed to celebrate graduating from high school.
My 19-year old daughter had already developed a strong sense of character and an aversion to drinking or drugs by her senior year of high school. She also has a stable, moral, respectful relationship with her long term friend-turned-boyfriend, and plans on marrying him after college. I would never dream of being so disrespectful to my daughter that I followed her and her boyfriend to prom in a condescending, accusatory manner, waiting for her to do something impulsive and self-destructive.
If I have to do that, then there’s something seriously wrong. I respect my daughter. I don’t own her choices. She owns her choices. I hope she has internalized what I have taught her over the years, but in the end I can’t control her choices.
In this situation, though, I don’t know that the boy has a right to complain since he agreed to these bizarre rules before enrolling in the school. If I were his father, I’d tell him I don’t agree with the rules but we have to follow them because we agreed to do it.