On being a self-made eunech and getting married

Hello everyone. I am 36 and I am female. I had my tubes tied several years ago after a disasterous second marriage, both of which were annulled. Then I got married again and had that annulled. So… here I am. I would also like to say that I was bipolar at the time of these marriages, but I am now medicated but I am also infertile. Jesus said that there were some who were made eunechs and some who made themselves eunechs, and that they should stay single. So my question is, should I remain in the single Consacrated life, or should I try to get a good Catholic man and marry him? I am torn both ways, but I would really like to have some imput from anyone who can help. Thanks, Hattyu71

Honestly I don’t think anyone here can answer that. I don’t even think you can answer that. I would suggest much time in prayer and wait for a clear answer either way. Maybe try the novena some on this forum have used that gives your answer in the form of a rose?

Hello hattyu71,

Are you saying that you were formally consecrated as a single? I thought consecrated singleness was permanent and one could not marry after being consecrated.

If you are not currently consecrated, being infertile does not mean you cannot consumate the marriage. If your decree of nullity is in order, you maycertainly find a nice man and marry. However, the choice is between God and you. I second Malia’s opinion: Pray and find out.

if you are capable of engaging in the marital act you are not a eunech (a term properly applied only to males who have had the genital organs removed, ie. testicles and hence cannot perform the sex act). Infertile is not the same as incapable. You might want to research pass threads on whether or not someone who has previously undergone surgical sterilization, man or woman, can licitly marry. the answer is yes, as long as they are capable of carrying out the marital act and are otherwise free to marry, and there is no requirement to reverse the procedure. this is answered several times on the AAA forum so that would be the place to start.

Hello Lattyu, I gather that you were able to get your marriages annulled because you were bipolar at the time. Even tho you can’t have children, I don’t know why you should not marry if it is permitted in the church. Have a happy life. God loves us all, children or no children. You should be able with your husband to give your time and energy to working in the church therefore building a relationship in God with who ever you marry. Be careful. May God bless you and give you wisom.

That’s St. Therese, Little Flower. :slight_smile: If you’re interested, Hatty, the novena can be found here:


should I remain in the single Consacrated life, or should I try to get a good Catholic man and marry him? I am torn both ways

Hi Hatty,
the choice over single vs.married life is not up to you or anyone else.
It’s up to God. He had chosen it for you even before you were conceived. Pray, sit-down-private-in your room-shut the door-kind of prayer. Not saying that you don’t do that. Just emphasizing its importance in discerning to what God is calling you. In the mean time, seek to do God’s will in all areas of life.

You will need to see a priest, I certainly don’t know the answer, but it appears that others here do, but seeing a priest would nevertheless be a great idea.

Yes, sterilization is not a good thing, but it also isn’t something that God can’t forgive. It also does not prevent you from enjoying a loving, selfgiving marriage. Like the other posters have suggested, talk to a priest. Go to confession if you haven’t already. See if you can get your previous marriages annulled based on your mental condition at the time. Once all that is taken care of, pray for God’s will with regards to your vocation…I will pray also.


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