[quote="heart4home, post:2, topic:284051"]
Are you in the United States? Honestly, I think women from fundamentalist backgrounds are far more likely to end up in that camp than any woman in a Catholic Parish.
The Church doesn't usually even preach from the pulpit using the word submission. They usually just talk about equal respect and love for your spouse etc. they don't preach it but some Catholic's take some teaching to far.
I also don't think that a woman being submissive to her husband in a Godly way, tends(the word you chose to use) to lead to abuse. I think that is definitely the exception, not the norm, and usually there is a lot more going on in the woman's life, marriage and domestic setting that she has found herself. yeah its not the norm but it does happen and rarely are both husband and wife on the same spiritual level.
I think the Catholic Church much more openly treats women as equals, at least in this place in time, and it would take an extremely Orthodox Church setting for any Catholic woman to not find herself among women who are working, modern and anything but submissive.
May an abuser seek out a weak, God loving woman and try to use submission as a key to get her to act or behave in a certain manner. Sure. But that is not the Church's fault, at least not in our present day. Decades/Centuries ago, perhaps. it does still happen today
We should be aware of such situations, but I certainly disagree with the idea that a couple that tries to live out a Godly marriage of love and respect with the man being the head of the family, as Christ is the head of the Church is something that automatically or even likely leads to abuse.
I never said it was the Church's fault and we can't just say its rare so shove it under the rug
[quote="ahollars, post:10, topic:284051"]
By not making statements like this, especially where they can hear (or in this case see) that this is what you really think of your faith. you missunderstood me I was reffering to NPD personally disorder not the Church teachings. but I see know how it can be read that way. abusive men tend to have NPD (narvisssistic personality disorder). I ment if a wife left her NPD abusive husband he could brainwash the children to hate her.
The Catholic Church does not cause situations like what you described. If things are really that bad, then get it on paper.
If anything, I would say that families going through type of suffering are not that close to the Church. Notice that I said "families" and not "persons". Husbands that are truly involved in parish ministry are not prone to living double lives. mentally ill people like NPD can be very hyper religious (its a great way to control people). Otherwise, women need to be prepared for the reality that they may have to save their family. Many women, in particular Catholic women who tend to be SAHMs, are not prepared for such a disaster. Being strong is not just a matter of faith. It takes character, determination, will, drive, and if necessary, ambition. Never allow yourself to be at the mercy of someone whom you cannot trust.