I asked this question a couple years ago on this forum: forums.catholic.com/showthread.php?t=404146
I did come forward: I emailed the priest who gave us couples counseling (my ex called it pre-pre-Cana -- then dumped me!). Later, I copied the same email to the head of vocations for our diocese.
So I did the brave thing: named names, copied people in my emails, gave contact information, etc. NOTHING happened. I'm being treated for PTSD, and he's studying in Rome. "Living well is the best revenge," and he's doing it.
Just thought I would provide an update, thank you for your advice, and maybe give some information about calling out an emotionally abusive and unstable future priest. sigh