I’m feeling completely overwhelmed, and at my brother’s advice, have given it up to God, but I still feel overwhelmed and unsure about what to do. I pray for guidance, for help, for comfort but there is little.
I am overwhelmed because I am:
- a SAHM to two boys, ages 2 & 4 and coordinate all of the house and child stuff associated with running our family
- a part-time grad student - thankfully I took this summer off.
- a part-time instructor for a graduate class (co-teaching with DH) that just started
- a part-time consultant for a client of DH’s (to help him out)
- conservator for my dad’s cousin, who has advanced stage Alzheimer’s. I handle all of her personal and legal affairs. Currently I’m selling her house, looking for a new nursing home placement, trying to fix her back taxes mess with the state and feds, coordinating her medical care, and talking to the staff because she’s having issues with falling.
- managing our household affairs, which includes getting the cars to the mechanics, electrician to fix the wiring, dry cleaning, swimming lessons, etc.
and then everything else in life - a little volunteer work, trying to stay in shape, getting together with friends, cleaning the house, laundry, groceries, what-have-you.
We have no time, no extra $ so pretty much I have to cook every meal (McDonald’s is a luxury now that gas is $4.3/g). And the pressure is on DH and me to try to consult and teach a little bit more on the side to help pay for what is going to be an enormous heating oil bill.
I feel like we just can’t get ahead - financially to a certain extent, but more time-wise. We have so little time for ourselves and I am so tired.
I’m not sure what I need - just a little peace I guess, and maybe for things to ease. I’m spread so thin that I don’t feel like I’m as good a mom as I should be although I know in my heart that’s not true. I don’t want to sound like I’m having a pity party, I’m just so tired.
Is life this complicated for everyone? I know everyone has their own crosses to bear, but mine just seem to be getting heavier and heavier. The only comfort I find is in Mass and when I get a few minutes with DH at night. How do you lighten the load?