I have the yearning and desire to be a priest, to be like Christ as a shepherd of His flock, because i really know for my self that i feel very comfortable to be in the Church ,to be with our Priest director and other priest and nun friends, to teach about the gospel virtues to my classmates , relatives who turn away from Jesus, and most especially to the poor and to be poor. I burn to defend our Church against any false accusations they stone against Her. I love the Church and Jesus and prayed a lot that one day , I’d die as martyr.
But i have a problem and that is my parents. One day I prayed to the Lord to help me convince them in the right time. But shortly after that prayer( after my pilgrimage to St. Benedict…) my parents found out about it and started to threat me . I can see they are doing all their best to keep me away from it . And since that day , they started to distance me from the Church. They told me its due to the influence of my friend priests, seminarians and nuns that i thought of being a priest , concluding that I do not have a vocation and should stop thinking about my “craziness” instead to help in the family’s business , which is in great crisis.
I do not blame them for that though , since they wee always at work and never gave time to know their son more and the changes ive undergone, that was already with Christ for a quite long time - in secret an theyre not that active in the Church especially my father.
My mother then started to get upset, weep and many other things and saying I disappointed her so much. I love my parents its just that I have to choose Jesus. I have to do many things to others rather than for our / my own benefit and luxury.
As of now, I am praying that my parents might finally be convinced about my progressing vocation. But as of now, it really seems impossible to change both their minds and my whole family’s mind . I am now in 4th year high school and I am waiting for the Lord to give me the right time to enter the seminary even if it is against my parent’s will . And if the time will come when the “signal” has come and i was still unable to convince them , then i have no other choice but to leave them in peace. I do not care if what might they do or their threats to me like total banishment and other , they could never stop me from helping the Church and Jesus.
please help me what else i could do. thank you for bearing with this long post.