I’m 25 and I’ve been dating my boyfriend for two years now. Based on our discussions, we want to get married next summer, so he should propose any day now. Anyway, to make a long story short, my parents don’t like him. They think that I’m too young to get married and that people shouldn’t be married until they have lived their lives longer and have worked more: probably until their early or mid 30s.
My parents are very old-fashioned, but I also think that they are more possessive rather than “conservative.” I’m conservative myself. I mean, I’m a 25-year old virgin and my boyfriend is a 28-year old one as well. We don’t live together or anything like that. He even asked my dad permission to date me, before we started going out, which my dad granted. However, a month after that, my parents started asking me not to bring him home to visit me or wouldn’t let me go out with him. After that they said that they didn’t like him and didn’t want him around. I asked them why and they said that they “didn’t know.”
Right after that, I ended up moving out from their house to another city where my boyfriend lived, because I found another job and for those two years I barely talked with my parents, so at this point, they don’t know him. Now I do talk to my parents, but they don’t ask anything about my boyfriend or don’t want to know anything about him.
This is a stressful situation for me, because I love my parents and now knowing that I don’t necessarily have their blessing just kills me. What kills me the most is that their reasons for not liking him don’t have any substance: he is a teacher so he doesn’t earn much–that’s why they don’t like him. They even tell me that the fact that he is a “great Catholic” is not enough.
Anyway, he is not welcomed at my parents’ so he won’t ask them if he can marry me. I would probably have to go and tell them and I’m just terrified in the sense that I’m scared of how depressed I’ll be when they say that they don’t agree with the wedding.
I’ve talked to my grandma, who knows and likes my boyfriend, and she said that she tried talking to my parents to ask them to welcome my boyfriend to their home, because that was the man I had chosen and they pretty much yelled at her for telling them that.
I wonder if any of you have had similar experiences and if there is any advice you can give me. I would greatly appreciate it. May the Lord bless you all.