People don't use wife/husband anymore?

I keep seeing people saying their “partner/s.o.” even if they are married. Why is that? Is it a new age thing?


Can’t imagine. Maybe the politically correct police got to them :confused: because I see a lot of NOT married or SSM couples using husband/wife, here.

they say that in Ireland for everyone.
Apparently the trend has moved across the pond. :shrug:

My academic supervisor (respectable Scottish professor, around 60-70 y.o.) uses this term: “My partner, my partner”. At some point I started suspecting he might be gay, but now I’m not sure… :confused:

I suspect it could be a couple things. They might simply not want to reveal their gender. They might also be trying to be politically correct and not trying to offend anyone with “gender biased” terms.

It could also be that people have decided that husband, wife or spouse means nothing anymore when the nature of marriage is dictated by political and judicial fiat.

I can understand it on the Internet when people don’t want to reveal their gender, however, in person, I refer to “husbands” and “wives” even if the people themselves refer to their significant other as a “partner.”

I suspect it may be unmarried couples who are using this term (whether heterosexual or ssm). Maybe they have kids, properties etc. together, all the trappings of a married life without the ceremony.
Married couples (both hetero and ssm) generally say husband/wife AFAIK.

Not me. My husband is still my husband.

Ive noticed this too, the first time I heard a man refer to his partner, I assumed he was talking about another man, (gay), but I learned his partner was a female, they were just a normal man/woman marriage. I wasnt sure why he called her his partner, but didnt think much of it at the time.

I think this is a new trend…trying to get rid of the ‘stereotypical’ husband/ wife terms.

In the UK, we’d usually say ‘partner’ when someone is in a long-term but not-married relationship with someone, rather than just ‘boyfriend and girlfriend’ - and those terms also aren’t appropriate when the people themselves are older.

As you say, increasingly you hear married people using the term, but I’m not sure why. I would rather be clear that I’m married and have a husband.

That is kinda where I think it’s going. If both a husband and wife are referend to as a partner, spouse, significant other, etc. then it is a way to say neither one or the other is significantly different. It also makes acceptance of same sex unions and non permanent unions just as equal since there is zero bias towards gender or permanency. It is simply a continuation of the homogenization of human relationships which recognizes no role of gender.

This is not just an LGBTQ thing, but also is a radical feminist idea that sees using “wife” as a way to indicate a woman is subordinate or less equal part of the relationship. It really gets down to a thought that male and female are not complimentary but rather equivalent. Not equal in value, but the same or interchangeable.

Yes, this. When I hear partner, I always think: not married. If I am married, I say married.

I’ve seen some say they refer to their spouse as their ‘partner’ as an instance of activism against ‘heteronormative oppression’. :rolleyes:

I remember reading a novel once in which a character did not like referring to his wife has his wife because it made him feel old. Perhaps people really do it to feel hip and young.

:rolleyes:Bah. I’m wishing people would wake up and spend time in activism that means something. There are still girls being burned to death as witches in India and ISIS is killing at will. An obscene number of human babies die to abortion every day and others are victims of hunger. That’s REAL oppression.

What was the context you were referring to specifically?

I mean official forms and such use terms like that out of simple necessity these days since married couples legally are no longer just husband and wife.

Outside that I see many people I know using “partner” or “significant other” when referring to their spouse but more so in certain situations than others. I mean some of my friends more deeply into being “friends” of the LGBT movement so they choose to refer to themselves using those terms out of respect for that movement. Some people I know use “partners” as a sign of respect for each other as that’s how they view themselves as primarily life partners and feel that is more representative of their relationship than the old traditional “husband” and “wife” roles. Some are simply not married despite being in committed long term relationships so husband and wife is not applicable.

Anytime I hear someone use the term ‘partner’ I usually think it means they are living in a same sex situation. But I’ve found now, as the OP said, this is not always the case. Britain seems to be using that term more and more to just mean your more-than-boyfriend (or girlfriend) that you are not married to and living with for a substantial amount of time.

Curious though in this age where its debated to change the meaning of the word ‘marriage’ to incorporate homosexual couples, that this new term ‘partner’ is used more and more also… To be someone’s partner is not the same as to be someone’s spouse… and I don’t even mean that in a ‘non-legally or married-in-the-church kind of married way’… I mean that in the way that its not the same thing. Your spouse is not your ‘partner’. * Being a spouse is SO much more than that,* but I think most people end up marrying a partner, because it sounds like the better deal. Its easy because you get along and you are already pulling the plow nicely together, which is a large part of having a successful marriage. I just don’t think its the full deal of what God intends. There is that phrase in Scripture and said at a marriage… “what God joined together”… and I don’t believe that has the same meaning as two people deciding and saying to themselves and others … “what we decided we’d like to join in God’s name and would like to believe its a nice union”. Many people do that I think because its easy- or they think it will be easier way and thus choose it. Yes, it can work, but is that what God intends? I know already many poeple would disagree with me on that. I can’t get around it spiritually though…

I think its the real reason behind the confusion in marriage today and also why marriage has been overtaken by ‘gay marriage’ and this emerging term ‘partner’. What God intends for marriage has been cheapened, sadly by a lot of people touting to be believers too. And no, I’m not talking romantic fairy tale hollywood movie dramatic love story here either… that goes along with the cheapening. I’m just saying “what GOD has joined” has to be some sort of separate SACRED spiritual thing that people (who seek God truthfully) will just ‘know’, and ‘feel’ and ‘sense’, deeply within their soul, like as life altering as a spiritual conversion, and it will be REAL and it will just be there. Both people will know that God joined them, not societal expectations, not monetary and material gain, not duty, not lust, not some singular loneliness searching to be appeased. etc. etc. It can’t be secular. It can’t be common. Like Eve for Adam, it has to be something set apart and specifically created by God.

I have no idea why! Personally I use husband/hubby but I don’t assume if someone else says “partner”.

I don’t really mind what a married couple calls each other. I’ve heard all sorts. Partner, other half, better half, the boss, husband, wife etc

I wonder how it would work out if we referred to our spouses as our “beloved”.

“My beloved and I went to the movies.”
“My beloved and I had dinner last night.”

I wonder if that would change our whole perspective on our husbands and wives.

Partnership is business term.

Beloved however has never been a term solely associated with husbands and wives. I think a more effective method is simply referring to your spouse as wife or husband.

Heck even SS couples I’ve come across tend to use the husband or wife title to refer to their other half for the power it conveys (it’s part of why they fought to be able to marry and use the title which was denied to them by the separate but equal ideas of civil unions or domestic partnerships). If anything “partner” for them was a lesser title they used in place of being able to use husband or wife. Which makes me wonder if the use of partner won’t eventually wane now that same sex couples can utilize husband and wife when they are married, leaving partner for situations where marriage hasn’t happened yet (heterosexual or same sex).

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