Hi, I’m a 21 year old college student. My mom was diagnosed with cancer last year ( Jan. 2008) and now, a year and a half later, is in Hospice and probably going to die within a month… I was raised Catholic ( My mom’s family was Catholic) but I haven’t attended mass regularly in about 5 or 6 years. I have strayed from the church, but I still really believe in God deep down and I just want to understand.
I am really struggling with my mom’s diagnosis and the fact that she has to suffer/ die and i have to lose her so early in my life. I am an only child and my parents are divorced, my dad and I have always have a bad relationship although he has stepped up to the plate in the last few weeks. I am going to be alone in the world. I like to think of my mother as my soul mate, my best friend, my other half… we are best friends and I know she is so worried about me.
I guess I am just looking for some comfort, any advice on what to say or do with her in these final weeks of her life. I had a preist in yesterday to do the Annointing of the Sick and I also went to mass yesterday morning (my best friend’s idea) to pray for her. I don’t want her to go, but I know I have to say goodbye and let her go. I just want her to go to heaven. I kinda wanna go with her. I know my life will never be the same without her- I don’t know how I will survive.
Why is there suffering in the world? Why do bad things happen to good people like her? Why am I being left alone in the world? What did she/ I do to deserve this? How can I make her comfortable and ease her mind even though I’m going crazy inside?