[quote="nana3, post:7, topic:288864"]
Your story touched my heart. It reminded me of my three sisters and the struggle and pain they went through in their divorces. My marriage is not a happy one either and we struggle to work on it so that we do not end up divorce. I don't now if your wife is willing, but Retrovaille may help your. We did that. We are not doing what the program suggest we follow up on, but we have some issues with mental problems on my husband part, so we are now in counseling first and then we will pick up where we left off. As long as she is willing to work on the marriage, there is hope. Even if she isn't, I heard many of the couples who gave witness said they were dragged to the weekend by their spouse and they were glad for it saved their marriage. Just an idea, I would hate to see another divorce for the children the ones who suffer the most.
You have many trials happening to you and this could be that the Lord is just pruning you. You know that part in the Bible where it talks about the vine and the branches and then He talks about bearing fruits and to bear fruit, he prunes first. The pruning process can be painful. You will be bearing much fruit when all this is over and it becomes clear to you. You may not see why all this is happening, but it is happening for a reason.
My sisters who divorced did not want the divorce. They tried to work things out, but their husbands wanted out immediately. They wondered "why?" Today, they can see how much happier they are and how their ex-husbands are very unhappy in life. They are still looking for happiness. They thought by a divorce they could be happier and yet they are not happier. They fall into a relationship or get remarried and regret the divorce they had with my sisters. So far two of my brother-in-laws admitted that.
I don't know if this helps you or not, but hang in there, you are not alone in how you feel. My sisters all felt this well and it gets better. At least you are turning to God for help. You are asking others to intercede for you with prayers. You are on the right track.
May the Lord Bless you and keep you in peace and love.
Thank you for your kind words and prayers. Right now I'm actually not too sure how much longer I actually want to be married to my wife. I know that sounds horrible, but we've both done so much to hurt and pretty much destroy our marriage, and its just gotten to the point where she shows zero interest in putting forth any effort to help with reconciliation. I mean, we made a tremendous amount of progress, but her father can't stand me and he has convinced her to abdicate any and all control she had over to him, and now its just down the drain. I love my wife - with all of my heart! But I can't continue in a marriage that is separated by 500 geographical miles with zero communication. I have many trials I am facing beyond our marriage, and if she isn't willing to stand with me as she vowed to me and to God in front of our families and friends, then what does that mean? To me it means I am just not worth any of her time.
I signed us up for Retrouvaille before she ended all communication. I have since had to cancel because, again, she is not interested in putting forth any type of effort for us to reconcile. I really thought God wanted us to go through with it - I really did because of the timing and how it was presented to me, but unfortunately I guess I was wrong.
My main intention here is to find out where God wants me. At the beginning of the year, when all of this started, it appeared to me that God was making his presence known to me in a more powerful way than any other time in my life. Unfortunately I don't seem to have that same presence. I mean, I have the faith that God is there and that he loves me, but I just don't seem to be getting any answers to prayers or signs as to what I am supposed to do - with anything: marriage, job, housing, etc. I just pray that God will again tell me what it is I am supposed to do.