Please pray for my son He might get evicted from his apartment


#1

I am trying to make this short, so if anything doesn’t make sense please just ask and I will give further information.

My son’s college sublets apartments for the students. My son shares an apartment with three other boys.

We and two sets of other parents were shocked the first day of school. The apartment had many things wrong with it, including being dirty, roach droppings, loose carpet, cracks in the wall and other things. We marked all these down on the appropriate forms and were assured that these things would be taken care of.

My son began to tell me small things about one of his roommates that worried me. Let’s call this room mate Ted(not his real name) Josh, my son, is pretty easy going. So, I was surprised when Josh called me to tell me that Ted was spoiled, used to getting his own way and refused to clean up. Another call from Josh mentioned that Ted admitted to doing pot but not to worry, they had all told him that he couldn’t do anything like that around the apartment.

Josh also began to complain that Ted wanted to party all the time and Josh had no desire too. Apparently, unknown to Josh, the other two roommates had complained about Ted to and Ted was told Wednesday of last week that he needed to find a different apartment.

Finally, Josh called me and announced that he had put in for another apartment because he really couldn’t get along with Ted. Good, I though, something about Ted is setting off mother’s alarm bells in my head. But sometimes getting information from an 18 year old boy is like pulling teeth.:frowning:

Last week, two of the other boys in the apartment told Josh that he never went anywhere so they were taking him out. He went to a night club for the first time and got his hand stamped so he couldn’t drink. One of the room mates could drink but he did it at the club not in the room. The other boy who didn’t drink either drove them home.

They got in very late and it was dark. They went straight to bed.

Early the next morning the student room advisor came into their apartment and found alcohol, which they are not allowed to have.

The three boys, including my son, told her that they had not been home that night. Several people backed them up and said that Ted had a party while they were gone.

Ted, meanwhile could not be found in the room.

All four boys had a hearing with the dean. Ted had his hearing separately from the other three. They were told that they have to get out in five days and that they could not bring up any witnesses on their behalf.

My husband and two other set of parents went to the school. The dean told them that it didn’t matter if the three boys were guilty, unless Ted came forward and admitted his guilt they would all get kicked out of the apartments. The policy, she said, was no alcohol and it didn’t matter if all the parties had knowledge of the alcohol being in the apartment or not.

Ted was asked by one of the parents to own up to the fact that he was the one throwing the party. Ted’s parents have already bought him a new apartment. Ted said, in front of my husband, that he is going to say that he was no where near the apartment but that the other three boys were there the whole time and faked their handstamp. He said, “I don’t have anything to gain by telling the truth and nothing to loose by my actions.”:mad:

All the parents demanded to talk to the president. The president assured the parents that he would look at the case and that he had the power to overturn the decision by the dean. He also asked them not to go to the press, something one set of parents had threatened to do.

Pray that God’s will be done in this case. I am not asking anyone to pray that Josh remains in the apartments because his father and I have decided to leave this in God’s hands. For all we know, God might want Josh away from the school. But if you could pray for him,I believe that it would help.

Also pray for his tourettes. My husband said that Josh looked horrible. My son said that he couldn’t eat and was throwing up. Plus his tourettes, which is usually mild, had become very severe because he was stressed and angry at Ted.:frowning:


#2

I should add one more thing. The boy, Ted, was kicked out of his last college for having drugs in his room and has a pending DUI. The dean told my husband that she knew about Ted’s past problems but they had no bearing on the present situation.:frowning:

Ted is still getting his own second hearing with the dean. We have no idea why.

The dean admits too that Ted has made four different conflicting statements about when he was in the room. Once, he said that he was there ten minutes, another that he was not in the room at all, one that only one of the other boys were present and now that all three were present.


#3

Maybe now would be the time to engage a local lawyer. You don’t want an eviction on your sons record. People (Employers and rental companies) ask about that.

One phone call from the lawyer will let the college know you are serious.


#4

Two sets of parents are already doing that. My husband and I are waiting for the President’s decision, which we were assured will come Thursday.

We were told that the boys only have five days to get out, if the decision is against them. We were told, by the dean, that the school doesn’t have to follow the laws on how to evict people.:confused:

So, yes, we will probably get a lawyer. Our heads are still spinning that this is even happening.

The president did ask the parents not to go to the press, as this would be a black eye to the school. He also said that he could overturn the dean’s decision.


#5

Is the President blackmailing you?

Go to the press, and even IF the Dean takes your side, I could evict your son anyway?

If you don’t go to the press, and the Dean makes a decision adverse to you, I could override him and make everything right?

Don’t be the only party in this affair without a lawyer.
*
(By the way, I am not a lawyer and didn’t stay at a Holiday Inn Express last night)*


#6

He needs to get out and find an apartment with like-minded people. The first rule of apartment hunting when you are a young person is find like-minded people, whether that means reading until 7 pm and going to bed to rise in time for Matins or pals for drug fueled debauchery.

If I were you, I’d instruct him to be more careful next time with who he rooms with.


#7

Have you looked for a Catholic dorm/fraternity/house where he can stay? I’m one who does not think most 17/18 year olds are mature enough these days to handle apartment living.

Something with more rules and structure sounds like the ticket.


#8

He didn’t pick his room mates. The school picked them for him. He did put in for another apartment that was available. He and a friend would have shared the room.

Josh likes two of his three room mates. But we didn’t know that one boy had so many problems.

The school had promised that it would match all the room mates up with similar interests. This was not done. The boy, Ted, has no interest in common with his other room mates.


#9

We have the number of both sets of parents. Chances are we would go to the press as a group.


#10

This is a small art school and it doesn’t have dorms, just apartments that it sublets.

My son has been looking for someone to go to Church with and the boy he wanted to share an apartment with is open to attending Church with my son.


#11

I agree. Part of my concern this entire time has been my son’s naivety. He was having trouble with Ted but he insisted that Ted wouldn’t do anything to hurt anyone.

Yes, he had been told that Ted did pot but my son was certain that Ted would not do this around the apartment or near Josh.

Despite my expressed concerns that Ted or one of his friend would steal from the room, Josh insisted that Ted would not do that.

18 year old boys, even ones that are basically good boys, can be very frustrating to deal with.:frowning:


#12

It sounds like the school’s major concerns are what the owners/managers of the apartment complex think and the school’s public image. If that means your son and the other two boys will be “collateral damage” then so be it.

It’s probable the appartment owner is worried too.

In any case, “The Truth” is probably not of particular interest to those in charge.


#13

My comment wasn’t about the press, it was about the President.

You don’t want him making deals with the other parents’ lawyers and hanging you out to dry.


#14

Deb, I have college students as well. I know their can be lots of drama and my prayers go out to your and your family.:blush: Hang in there


#15

Drugs are a horrible waste of time, and I’ve never touched them.

However, a little perspective here.

Art school. College.

You might want to think about a private apartment. “Ted” might not have problems, he might just be an art student. Expect more Teds as long as you keep going through their service.


#16

I don’t understand how attending an art school would predispose someone to drugs. Ted originally came from UNC where he was thrown out for having pot in his room. I don’t know why the university didn’t contact the police at that point. It might have saved my son and his roomates trouble.:frowning:

You get kicked out of my son’s apartments for doing drugs, or having a room mate that does drugs. So, it isn’t something that the school just accepts because the kids are ’artistic’ types.

My husband and I are discussing the possibility of just having my son attend the local community college instead. He could still transfer later on.


#17

Thank you so much.


#18

Honestly until I read your post, I hadn’t thought of this.:frowning: I will discuss this with my hubby.


#19

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