Please pray for our theology?

Hello. I am a male and I prefer to remain anonymous. I am in need of advice AND intercession. Long story short I met my girlfriend about a year and a half ago. She was raised Catholic. I decided I should rejoin the church since I was originally raised Catholic as well (but I left the church at a younger age to seek other forms of spirituality).

Since I have been in RCIA (which has been since September) I have been studying and praying hard about my faith. I actually find genius in a lot of the dogmas of the Church. However, me and my girlfriend do not see eye to eye on some things (I don’t say this out of hate, but genuine concern). We have talked about the topics of what chastity means, homosexuality, abortion, confession, and a few other things :shrug:. She is more “liberal” in her theology and I seem to be more “old school.” In a way it kind of scares me and I just want us to raise a holy family one day (she agrees that she would like her children raised Catholic). I should mention we are both in our 20’s and almost done with school so we see marriage as a possibility in the near future.

So I am PLEASE asking for your prayers and any advice. I have praying the rosary for EVERYDAY for the past month almost. I have RCIA this week and confession so also pray for that haha.

Also, one last thing. I have had a dream about Our Lady of Guadalupe, and ever since then her image is appearing everywhere; like on prayer cards, the internet, references to her in books. I don’t know what that means. Any insight?

Thank you again!

You are right to be concerned…for marriage is very much about children and one needs to raise them as Christians who live and profess the whole of the Faith.

It depends on what one means- there is no “liberal” approach that is possible for Christians that is contrary to the teaching of the Church. Such would simply be “not Christian…not Catholic”. So if that is the case -such is a very large red flag.

It is best to build a marriage on the sure foundation of Christ.

Of course one want to approach such (persons who have taken to problematic approaches and ideas etc) with love and understanding of the influence of the surrounding culture. With open hearts and gentleness …remembering that truth and love go together.

Yes pray. And work. And discern and judge well… And pray some more.

Also read: (keep reading after the first part) from Pope Benedict XVI: vatican.va/holy_father/benedict_xvi/homilies/2009/documents/hf_ben-xvi_hom_20090628_chius-anno-paolino_en.html

Read the messages from world youth day with Pope Benedict XVI :slight_smile: Here are some…

vatican.va/holy_father/benedict_xvi/speeches/2011/august/documents/hf_ben-xvi_spe_20110820_veglia-madrid_en.html

vatican.va/holy_father/benedict_xvi/speeches/2011/august/documents/hf_ben-xvi_spe_20110818_accoglienza-giovani2-madrid_en.html

vatican.va/holy_father/benedict_xvi/homilies/2011/documents/hf_ben-xvi_hom_20110821_xxvi-gmg-madrid_en.html

vatican.va/holy_father/benedict_xvi/travels/2011/index_madrid_en.htm

Your profession of your Faith --your living and learning etc the fullness of the Catholic Faith–your discipleship – your discussion and prayer – can be of help to her in her encounter with Christ and the Faith of his Church where that may not be clear.

But seek such *prior *to any marriage…

(do read that first link – and keep it and read it from time to time --we all need this “renewal of the mind” --especially in midst of the surrounding culture)

Does your girlfriend know that the Catholic Church was started by Christ?

Yeah. It’s like this. She is also learning about the faith to with me. She’s really busy so she can’t always make it to RCIA and doesn’t have time to read apologetics. She has been listening to Catholic CDs but if she feels uncomfortable with something the church teaches she has a hard time agreeing with it. I just want us to be authentic in our faith together.

She does want to read The Lamb’s Supper by Scott Hahn with me when she gets the free time. She also wants us to go to confession and talk with a priest together at some point when a day is open for us to make an appointment. So there is a lot of hope. I just cause myself anxiety over it I guess. I just don’t think one should pick and choose what to believe in the Church’s teachings.

Well if she knows that the Catholic Church is the true Church, then why would she disagree with any of the Church’s teachings?

Good and yes.

I will pray for you. I do not recommend marrying her until she believes in what Jesus teaches through the Catholic Church. It would be very tough for you otherwise.

Our Lady of Guadelupe is very much a pro-life symbol. When she appeared to Juan Diego
in the vision, she was pregnant with Jesus in the apparition.

God bless you.

You’re correct it is not right to pick and choose; however, have patience with her and pray often. I’ve personally seen the power of prayer in this type of situation. My brother had the same issue and he tried his best to be patient and consistant in prayer. It has made a huge difference and his now wife is leaps and bounds closer to orthodoxy than she was before he started praying.

One book I would also recommend reading is “Three to Get Married” By Ven. Archbishop Fulton J Sheen.

Also, welcome back home!!!

I’m a big believer in thinking that we don’t choose the saints we build special relationships with in our Catholic faith. I believe they choose us (but we think we choose them).

Perhaps it is time to consider having a special devotion to Our Lady of Guadalupe. Consider that she is reaching out to you.

Our Lady loves us greatly. She is never far from us, but instead is always on our side. She never tires of bringing Christ to us, which she has done since she was on earth and betrothed to St. Joseph.

Just something to think about. Perhaps this is a sign that you have got friends in Heaven who are delighted and ready to help you on your faith journey!

I think it is important to agree on basic theology because the job of a spouse is to help the other get to heaven. However I would allow room for growth for both of you. My wife and I have become far more faithful through our years of marriage and having children. We went from premarital sex, Contracepting, "c"atholics with an openly gay couple in our wedding party to homeschooling, daily mass attending first in the confessional Catholics who don’t even use NFP.:shrug:

That being said, we never “disagreed” with the Church on any of those issues, we just were too weak to employ them in our own lives at the time.

I will say this however, a woman for the extermination of babies and a supporter of the holocaust of abortion would NEVER be on my radar. Ever. I would always have been repulsed by someone who openly protected the right of a mother to kill her baby. I would not be able to physically procreate with such a person. And if someone had an understanding of marriage that allowed for the lie of gay “marriage” I would also question if we were ready to enter into that Holy Sacrament at all.:shrug:

Just a few thoughts that I hope help. You have been praying the rosary daily. It could be possible that Our Lady, through the images of Her that you have been seeing, is letting you know that She hears your prayers and is interceding for you.

I prayed many roasries for a grown child and one day Our Lady gave me a sign (I wasn’t looking for one) that I interpreted that my child was in Our Lady’s hands. It gave me such peace and, yes, things did work out in my child’s life both spiritually and otherwise.

I believe you are on the right track in praying for your girlfriend and learning about the Catholic faith, planning to follow that faith as best as you are able. God bless you and your girlfriend.

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