Please pray for my husband to return to the sacraments, he is in dire need of God’s grace right now.
He went out of town this weekend to visit his friends and did something stupid. I’m not sure gratitude is really the right word to use, but I was grateful when he finally came home this evening that he was pretty prompt about telling me . . .I had spoken w/ him earlier b/c his original plans were to be back in town by 1 to go to a game w/ his brother, but he said he overdid it at the bar the night before and wanted to recover before coming home. So he didn’t make it back till about 6:30 and went straight to bed, still not feeling great.
The kids and I had just finished supper and I was getting ready to give them a bath when he called me to our room to confess. I guess his friend’s girlfriend bought some ‘legal’ synthetic pot and DH decided to get in on the action w/ his buddies. He said he immediately didn’t feel right and got very ill. Keep in mind that in his college days, he’d done the real thing, so I guess he’d be able to tell the difference in how you’re supposed to feel (beats me, I’ve never done anything like this).
So one of his other friends that he was actually staying with nursed him and DH said that he broke down crying to his friend about how much he loved me and the kids and felt like such a jerk and a loser for doing what he did.
I’m really not all that mad - I figure when he gets around some of his friends that he’s going to be tempted to do something stupid. I told him that my only concern was trusting him. With the internet pornography incident last summer, meddling with any substance that would interfere with his inhibitions is what concerns me most. What he did really only harmed HIM (in a sense), but he could very easily have done other things that would have been very hurtful to our marriage and family.
I told him that he has 2 friends whom I really trust, but these other guys very obviously do NOT have his best interest in mind and he would do well to distance himself from them or simply not go with them except for a meal and movies. I’m almost to the point of saying that he’d be best just not to visit his friends away from home w/out me anymore. Really, it’d be better for them to come here and visit us where, granted there’s less to do, but there’s less temptations for stupid stuff.
Just not really sure how to take this. This isn’t the first time he’s done stupid stuff like this. Quite frequently he will attend social events locally on the weekends which involve drinking and he overdoes pretty well everytime and then it takes him most of the following week to fully recover and just by the skin of his teeth get all of his time in at work. I think at this point, the natural physical consequences of getting sick and the emotional consequences of feeling like he’s let himself and me down pretty well are all the punishment he needs.
I just really with he’d go with me to talk to our priest. I really want to visit with him myself, but I wouldn’t feel right talking to him about my problems w/ DH and basically ‘telling’ on DH - just feel like it’d be better straight from the horse’s mouth and then DH wouldn’t feel ashamed so much or betrayed that it came from me instead of him.
Please pray for DH to really step up and do what he needs for himself in his faith and in serving our family in his vocation. Not really sure what else to say.