Prayer for my aborted baby

Four weeks ago I had an abortion, I was in a very abusive relationship, I had a screw driver held to my face, was receiving upwards of 500 phone calls a night, threatening texts everyday, hundreds of them with profanities I can’t even repeat… “Kill yourself and that baby, *****.” I thought that abortion would rescue me from the relationship… In my fear and selfishness, I went to the abortion clinic and began the start of a two day abortion procedure. The first day laminaria is was inserted into me to dilate my cervix, I was to go home for the night after the laminaria was inserted… As soon as I got home, I instantly felt this immense remorse… I was hurting someone who never did anything but love me, I was taking out my problems with a man on an innocent baby. I instantly began looking up abortion reversal on the Internet, I knew that the start of the procedure had begun, but it was not over yet. I kept telling myself, “Do not be scared of the Angels of Death until they are upon you.” Finally I found a website for a catholic hospital that performs abortion reversals, they remove the laminaria and hope that the cervix will close in order to carry the baby to term…I read of a woman who had the laminaria removed and delivered a healthy baby girl, I knew that because of the laminaria insertion, I was at risk for a pre term delivery or miscarriage, but some hope at life was better than none. This hospital was in Chicago, twelve hours away from me… I began researching more on the Internet and found that this was the only hospital that would perform this removal procedure… I found that the laminaria must be removed within 24 hours and that the ER and any other hospital that does not perform abortions would not be comfortable removing laminaria. So I went back to the clinic that started my procedure and asked if they could remove the laminaria, I had so much hope. The nurse looked at me and said, “oh, honey, it’s too late for that. Dr. Nauser already cut the umbilical cord. It’s already dead.” I was crushed, my hopes were in vain. They proceeded with the second part of my procedure and my baby was taken out of my womb. I woke up feeling empty, like a piece of me was missing. I know that my baby had a purpose, because if she didn’t, she wouldn’t have been here. I know that she had a soul, because if she didn’t, my soul wouldn’t feel like a piece of it was missing. Now I am left to wonder where my precious baby girl is? Is her soul save in the arms of Mary in heaven, being rocked and soothed along with the other angel babies who lost their lives to soon? Is she trapped in the walls of the horrific place that is the abortion clinic? Is she a little ghost suffering in purgatory? Was she baptised in blood? Will her soul be at rest, is she safe from any pain I may have caused her? Will she ever forgive me? Is she sad that mommy didn’t want her? Please pray for my baby, I named her Beatrice Hope… I don’t want her to think that the world doesn’t mourn her loss, she would have been a gift to the world. I had no right to take her life, I would do anything to get her back.

Praying

watch this please asap

youtube.com/watch?v=o6DDO06zkcA

God makes aborted / miscarried children whole and in this video it shows how he does it

be at peace hugs n prayers

this other video is really good also and makes you feel at peace, he takes the child and loves it in heaven, you are not alone, many other women have done the same, he talks about that also

youtube.com/watch?v=XKPFqTahBoY

Hail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee.

Blessed are you among women, and blessed is the fruit of your womb Jesus.

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners, now and at the hour of our death.

Amen.

Our Father who art in Heaven, hallowed be thy name.

Thy kingdom come, thy will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven.

Give us this day our daily bread.

And forgive us our trespasses, as we forgive those who trespass against us.

And lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.

Amen.

Dear Hopeangel17 – 28 May 2013
I write to you with very great Love…and with profound sorrow. I join you in your remorse and sorrow. I write to you as I believe Jesus himself would write to you.

You recognize that you have done a terrible thing … something you tried to stop but were too late. You are truly sorry for beginning this terrible thing. Jesus receives your great sorrow. Talk to Jesus intimately about this very bad thing in your life. Jesus hears you and continues to Love you.

Yes, a part of your life is missing…and that emptiness will remain with you for a long time. And only Jesus himself and his Love can fill that emptiness. Talk with him about Beatrice Hope. Let Jesus, over time, fill that emptiness.

I do not know details about how Jesus deals with Beatrice Hope and other aborted babies. But I know some things. Jesus and Mary continue always to Love Beatrice Hope. God Works in us both to choose good things and to do what God wants done – yet never forcing us. God Willed and continues to Will the Salvation of Beatrice Hope, the sharing of God’s Divine Life in the Beatific Vision. This precious daughter of God is not there yet. Nevertheless I firmly believe I can assure you that she is safe and carefully cared for. How? I do not know.

Beatrice Hope is not some kind of ghost. That is nonsense. She is a human person, a human being, whose soul has been torn from her body.

She has not been baptized in any way. This is something God will take care of…somehow and someway and sometime in the future. We do not know the details of this.

The pain that she will experience – now? at a future time? I don’t know – will be the pain of separation from complete union with God. This is the pain of Love, yearning and unfulfilled. Yearning for you, her mother…and yearning for complete union with God, Who alone can complete and Fulfill her.

Yes, I believe she is sad that Mommy didn’t want her. We all want and need to be Loved.

But you, Hopeangel17, must not despair. You must not because Jesus Loves you and he Loves Beatrice Hope also. You must trust in God’s Infinite Love … without understanding how God will handle this. Jesus, God Himself, suffered and died to prove to you how much He, God, Loves you and your aborted baby. He proved to you his Love … and now you must trust that Love.

What has happened will take a long time to heal. You must realize this and trust absolutely Jesus’ Love … over the coming weeks and months … whatever time God uses to do His Work.

Dear Hopeangel17, in Jesus Christ I send you his Love and my own. Yes, I will pray for both Beatrice Hope and for you.

I will pray also that this abusive relationship you are in will be broken, smashed, totally, completely, and forever.

You are free either to post on the forum or to email me personally at Trinity5635@aol.com
My name is John.

Your baby is in heaven with God. She will forgive you if you are sorry. She loves you even though you did kill her. She is praying for you. I know you must be in pain, but your daughter is in heaven she is safe with Jesus

Dearest Hope Angel,

God’s love for you is endless. God’s love for your precious Beatrice Hope is endless. Your sweet little Beatrice Hope is with God and she loves you beyond measure. She knows the love you have for her and the pain you are living. Beatrice is praying for you to heal. One day she knows you will hold her in your arms in heaven. Today, she prays that you feel God’s love and forgive yourself. Like all babies who die before their mothers, she prayers for your soul.

God has blessed you with a heart and soul that quickly searched for a way to save your baby girl. He has blessed you with the gift of true sorrow. Many mothers who loose their babies through abortion do not experience this sorrow for a long, long time. Your healing begins when you feel the sorrow.

It is very important that you not carry this sorrow alone. There are many places that will help you with your healing. No one at one of the Post Abortion Healing Programs will be mean or ugly to you. Post Abortion Healing Programs allow you to begin to forgive yourself and to feel the forgiveness God and your precious baby have for you.

Please contact a Post Abortion Healing Program at once. No one will share your name. It is all very confidential. There will be others mourning with you, but your group is very private.

Most diocese offers a confidential program such as Project Rachel.

Please go quickly to the Sacrament of Confession. Your healing will be even more profound as you experience absolution.

Blessings on you. May you know Beatrice Hope is in the Eternal Glory and Presence of Our Dear God offering her prayers for her beautiful mother, for you.

Project Rachel :Hope after Abortion hopeafterabortion.com/

Post Abortion Walk postabortionwalk.blogspot.com/

Rachel’s Vineyard rachelsvineyard.org/

Silent No More silentnomoreawareness.org/

October Baby youtube.com/watch?v=I_9l7lEe-AA

Healing - October Baby pattimaguirearmstrong.com/2012/04/healing-through-october-baby.html

Surrendering the Secret surrenderingthesecret.com/

National Helpline for Abortion Recovery nationalhelpline.org/

Oh dear hopeangel,
I will offer a prayer for Beatrice and pray that she is in the loving presence of Jesus. Hopeangel, I pray that you may get yourself out of this abusive relationship. There are so many organizations that are willing to help you, call Birthright (birthright.org/) , they are willing to offer you free counselling.

Most loving, infant Jesus, I pray that baby Beatrice is with you right now. I pray for most Divine, that hopeangel encounters the mercy that only you can give

Eternal God , in whom mercy is endless,
and the treasury of compassion inexhaustible ,
look kindly upon us and increase Your mercy in us ,
that in difficult moments we might not despair
nor become despondent , but with great confidence ,
submit ourselves to Your Holy Will ,
which is love and mercy itself . Amen

Our father who art in heaven
Hallowed be your name
Your kingdom come
Your will be done
On earth as it is in heaven
Give us this day our daily bread
And forgive us our trespasses
As we forgive those who trespass against us
Lead us not into temptation
But deliver us from evil
Amen

Hail Mary,
full of grace,
the Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
pray for us sinners now,
and at the hour of our death.
Amen.

Hail Mary,
full of grace,
the Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb,
Jesus.
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
pray for us sinners now,
and at the hour of our death.
Amen.

I am so sorry you had this experience! You were also abused by the clinic that did the abortion. Please go to one of the resources suggested for healing and help. You are not the first to be in this situation and they really do know how to help. I will pray for you and your baby.

Be assured that you have a daughter in Heaven who is waiting for you. Continue your journey and re-unite with her.

Praying for your daughter and for you as well.

Your little angel is waiting for you in heaven. She will not judge you, there will be no hate, no bitterness. Don’t be afraid of speaking with her or meeting her. She already loves you.:hug3::blessyou: God Bless you and Beatrice. I am praying for you.

The Lord is merciful.-Of course, your beautiful daughter is in Heaven!
And you so will you one day! [With confession and repentance] :smiley:
I prayed for you and your lovely daughter! :]

Thank you so much for all of your prayers, I appreciate all of the kind replies and I loved the videos posted, they brought peace to my heart… I pray for all of the women that are in abusive relationships or who are pressured or coerced to abort. That they realize how precious life truly is and that their babies can be the one light that shines in the darkness for them… I never want another baby or mother to go through what I have been through. The clinic workers knew my situation and seemed to think that they were saving me from abuse and torment, but all they took was my motherhood, no abuse went with it. Since the abortion, I have filed an ex parte and pressed charges on the father of my baby…I could have done that while I was pregnant and kept my baby… I just pray that victims of abuse and rape know that abortion can be much more painful. It hurt even more when I found out my baby was a girl, two girls lost at the hands of violence… And one was at the hands of my own.

Consider Project Rachel: Hope after abortion.org I believe.
A great site for people recovering from abortion.
I

Your baby girl is in the hands of our loving God and so are you. You are in my daily Mass and Prayers.
I would talk to a priest as soon as possible, he can help you with all your questions and tell you where to go for counseling in your area. God Bless, Memaw

I have looked up projectrachel and I actually messages Alveda King on Facebook, as well, she had two abortions she regrets and is now very influential in the pro life movement, I want to join the women regret abortion campaign because I’ve met so many women who can’t live with themselves after what they have done, just like me… And you would never know this if you talked to pro choicers, they deny that Post Abortive Syndrome is even real… I just want to let women know how much pain I am in, how no matter what I do I can never get my baby back or make up for what I did to her… I think that the only way I can live with myself is to help other women know that this is the wrong decision and that abortion will not wash away all of your problems…

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