I have born this burden on my heart for so long that I feel that The Lord is asking me to let it go and turn it over to others.
I have been married to a wonderful man for almost 18 years. When I married him he made no secret of the fact that he was not only not a Catholic but also an athiest. He is a wonderful caring individual who is devoted to social justice and has been a wonderful spouse and father to our two boys (16 and 10).
While making no secret that he was not a believer he stood beside me at their baptisms, first communions and my eldests confirmation. He is a good man and I love him dearly but found out early that we could not talk about faith and religion without his “logic” causing me pain and heartache, so he will not discuss it with me anymore because he does not like to see me so hurt. Neither will I ask him to lie or pretend, just for me. If he is to come to God his faith and his belief would have to be genuine. I will ask no more of him. I have turned my fear for his soul over to God and dedicated myself to prayer for him, but after 18 years there is no change.
Today he is facing a major hurdle in his life. Although he hides it well, I know that he has always been a mild and secret user of marajuana. He has a job interview and drug test today that would make a tremendous impact on his ability to get good insurance and benefits to take care of his family. He is very remorseful and frightened that his giving up this habit was too long in comming and he will have been too late.
So I am asking anyone who is so inclined to pray for him. Not that he is clean enough to pass this test, but that this experience might be the moment to bring him to God. I can forgive my husband, because I have the streagth of God’s love behind me, but I don’t know if he can forgive himself.
Please pray for him that something in this experience, no matter what happens will help him see the face and hands of God in his life and that he will be touched by Gods love today.