Prayers for my journey


#1

Hello all,

First off I’m not Catholic, I’m not a Christian by any definition I suppose except that I was baptized when I was 12 in a Freewill Baptist church and gave up religion soon after.

I will say that by many diverse & really unwanted paths I have ended up studying the Catholic faith: reading books, radio & EWTN when it was available.

Off and on over the past 5 years I have attempted to pray the Rosary and other formalized prayers & attended Mass occasionally in order to try and make a faith inside of me or make me feel something I’m not sure I really believe, mainly that Jesus is God or that even there is anything more than what our senses perceive, i.e. I’ve lived a pretty much modern atheistic life of relativism and nihilism (if truth be told) more than anything, chasing money and pleasures of the world.

Over the past year I pretty much gave up on all this Christian stuff. All of it.

However over the past few weeks I’ve had an annoying desire to pray the Rosary when I’m walking and over Thanksgiving I had a discussion with my brother-in-law involving Minneapolis where I used to live and later that night as I slept I dreamt of Minneapolis and in the dream my goal was to get to a Catholic church and pray the Rosary. For a day or two afterward it haunted me.

A few days ago I stumbled across Savior.org and their perpetual online Eucharistic adoration site. Last night I sat in front of the Blessed Sacrament presented on my computer screen and prayed and experienced such a sense of peace that my rational mind wants to blame on chemicals in my brain…my wanting to feel something.

But I admit that I believe that it’s more than that. That what I experienced (and am reliving now as I type thinking about it) was more than chemical reactions in a brain that wanted a mystical experience. I’m at a loss really except that today I had a desire to just simply stop in the middle of my day and tell Jesus “Hi” and that I prayed the Jesus Prayer just because it came to me as I was driving down the road.

I will admit that my family, while Christian, does not think highly of Catholicism (well my father at least…my mother just wants me to believe in Jesus and I don’t think really cares what the denomination is…) so I can’t or don’t feel like I can talk about it with them.

So I’m here just to unload myself and ask for prayers…to ask whatever God wants for me will be made apparent to me if he wants anything at all.

John.


#2

Praying for you from today’s Liturgy of the Hours:

Prayers and Intercessions

Christ is the wisdom and power of God and he delights to be with the sons of men. Trustingly let us call on him:

  • Be close to us, Lord.

Lord Jesus Christ, you called us to your kingdom of light:
make us live our lives rightly, pleasing God in all things.
You stand among us, unrecognised by the world:
show your face to mankind.
You are closer to us than we are to ourselves:
keep strong in our hearts the trusting hope of salvation.
You are the spring from which holiness flows:
let us be holy and unstained on the day when you come again.

Our Father, who art in Heaven,
hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come,
thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread,
and forgive us our trespasses
as we forgive those that trespass against us,
and lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil.

Show forth your power, O Lord, and bring your great strength to our aid.
Although our sins impede our steps,
let your grace help us to go forward.

Through our Lord Jesus Christ, your Son,
who lives and reigns with you in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
God for ever and ever.
Amen.


#3

John, I’m afraid I couldn’t surpress a little chuckle.
God has you in His loving sight, and I don’t think you’ve much chance of escaping His love and His desire for you to become
one of His beloved sons!

Speaking to Jesus in that warm, natural way shows that Jesus is already in your life!

'll keep you in my prayers…Trishie


#4

Elixer, I will pray for you.

And I just have to put in … Phoenix, the liturgy that you post more often than not speaks to the request of the person so well, that it gives me chills.


#5

Thank you Trishie. I chuckle to myself as I’m taking my daily walks recently and the Rosary sneaks up on me.

And thank you Baptista & the phoenix, your prayers and thoughts are very helpful.


#6

Praying for your continued progress in bringing Jesus into your life.


#7

Praying very hard for you, John! I sent you a PM with a little information/advice, as I was someone who was in a similar position.

Also agreeing with you, Baptista. Phoenix certainly has a gift for it. :smiley:


#8

Hi John,

You are in my prayer. The Rosary prayer is very powerful and Mother Mary has drawn me closer to Jesus. Try to stop by a Catholic church and say hi to Jesus, if you could…pray the Rosary - nothing’s harm there but you did fullfil the dream.

God bless you on your journey Home.


#9

Praying for you.Ps.139


#10

My office is on the same street as a local church with perpetual adoration and I’ve thought of stopping there some time.

Thank you all for your prayers.

:thumbsup:


#11

I have to admit that even though I felt the pull all last night and today to go to Mass I was obstinate and refused.

My pride and hence my weakness simply wouldn’t allow me to admit to my own wife that I needed and wanted to go. And she would have gone gladly of that I’m sure. She is of no particular denomination, nor even baptized but has no qualms about giving to God the honor due him.

Why do I do this? I don’t know. But I’m not happy with myself and I felt irritated all day because I knew I was shrugging off the promptings of the Lord.

It’s on me and I keep asking for prayers and for my pride to be brought to humility.

John


#12

Sounds like you have a good wife. Prayers for you both.

Something to keep in mind: There will be special Masses this Monday for the Feast of the Immaculate Conception. Perhaps you could go to an evening Mass? This would be a perfect and timely opportunity.

Praying from today’s Liturgy of the Hours:

Prayers and Intercessions

God the Father decided long ago to bring salvation to his people. Let us pray to him:

  • Lord, watch over your people.

God, you promised to sow the seed of justice among your people:
preserve your Church in holiness.
God, turn the hearts of men to your word
and give your faithful an untroubled path to holiness.
Keep us in the love of your Spirit
let us receive the compassion of your Son who is to come.
Keep us strong, most gentle God, till the very end
and the coming of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Our Father, who art in Heaven,
hallowed be thy name.
Thy kingdom come,
thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread,
and forgive us our trespasses
as we forgive those that trespass against us,
and lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil.

God, you sent your only Son into this world to rescue mankind from its sinful state.
Give us, who faithfully wait for him, the grace of your righteousness
so that we may gain the reward of true freedom.

Through our Lord Jesus Christ, your Son,
who lives and reigns with you in the unity of the Holy Spirit,
God for ever and ever.
Amen.


#13

Praying for you and your wife.


#14

Praying for you!!

John, you know what? One of my great-grandfathers was a Free Will Baptist minister.(Maybe not a coincidence that I read your whole thread…:slight_smile: ) He died when he was quite young, many years ago, taking food to families when there was a flu epidemic back in the 19th C. So, I am asking Grandpa Frank to pray espeically for you and your journey…

God bless you & yours.


#15

I will be praying for you and your wife:gopray2:


#16

Praying for you.


#17

Hi everyone,

Just thought ya’ll would appreciate an update since my last post. Me & the wife went to Mass today and it was wonderful, she even brought up the idea before I did.

Went to a really beautiful, very old church that while not real opulent had fantastic stained glass windows and was packed full of people. I admit to being a little concerned before going because I checked out the website for the church and since there were pics of nuns with no habits and…well…liberal sounding kind of language I expected a watered down Catholic teaching.

Was I ever wrong. There seemed to be great reverence for the Eucharist, the priest preached Jesus and even mentioned…* sinister music *…serious sin. There was even a small area to pray the Rosary. Good stuff I thought. If I’m going to a Catholic church I want it to BE Catholic.

A funny story about the stained glass windows. Earlier this week I snuck (sneaked?) into a Catholic book store and picked up a Rosary. Since I’m on the road most of the day I was looking for a 1 decade auto Rosary and there was a pretty one with the theme of The Sacred Heart, prayer card and all. It’s pretty & inexpensive and I buy it.

So today I sit down at Church and look next to me at the stained glass window and what is mere feet away from me? A huge Sacred Heart…me thinks God has a sense of humor.

:thumbsup:


#18

Great to see you back, Elixir. :slight_smile:

From today’s Liturgy of the Hours:

Short reading Ezekiel 36:25-27 ©
I shall pour clean water over you and you will be cleansed; I shall cleanse you of all your defilement and all your idols. I shall give you a new HEART, and put a new spirit in you; I shall remove the HEART of stone from your bodies and give you a HEART of flesh instead. I shall put my spirit in you, and make you keep my laws and sincerely respect my observances.


#19

The Phoenix so often inspires us with Scriptural readings, a gift, I think.

John I’ve been keeping you in my prayers. Clearly, we all have. :slight_smile:
I praise and thank God for the blessings He is giving you and your wife.


#20

Im praying for you and your wife.

Our Father, Who art in heaven
Hallowed be Thy Name;
Thy kingdom come,
Thy will be done,
on earth as it is in heaven.
Give us this day our daily bread,
and forgive us our trespasses,
as we forgive those who trespass against us;
and lead us not into temptation,
but deliver us from evil. Amen.


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