Praying with my non-Catholic fiance


I posted this also in Spirituality but thought I’d give this group a shot too.

I am not sure how to pray with my fiance as we are both used to different ways of praying - I am used to reciting prayers, praying the Rosary, asking for the intercession of Saints, and silent meditation. H2B was raised Baptist and his prayers are more ‘off-the-cuff’, from the heart and free-flowing.

How can we pray together that makes it comfortable for both of us?

Has anyone had similar experience or ideas to share?

Thanks, God Bless.

I initialy ran into this with my now wife as she was Catholic and I was a Baptist at the time I am now a Catholic. My suggestion would be to start off with a couples devotional book. This will help in my opinion bring you two closer togethter spritualy with God. These typ of books usualy also have prayer’s for the couples to do together also. To help you slowly start praying together.

Remember that the prayers such as the Rosary and intercession of Saints are extreemly foreign to him and he was taught that they were tabo. There is nothing wrong with either form of prayer though. I suggest also that maby a common table prayer together as this might help as a starting point.

Overall patients on bolth ends are highly crucial.

If you pray together, make sure you pray for the common good, God hear prayers (even from pagans) if its for the good of everyone (like healing of sick, finish schooling, safety. etc.)

do not pray the specific baptist prayer, as this might be a heretical prayer

H2B was raised Baptist and his prayers are more ‘off-the-cuff’, from the heart and free-flowing.

**I was raised a Baptist.

Trust me. The prayers he’s saying are based on models he’s heard before, especially if every other word is “Father” or “I/we just wanna…”**

How about praying the psalms? They’re scriptural, so he’ll like them. And you can consider them similar to the Liturgy of the Hours.

Start off by finding out which formal prayers you both know - the Our Father. Maybe the Apostle’s Creed? Maybe the Glory Be? Pray those together. Perhaps sing or pray together some of the hymns you both know (there are bound to be a fair few). And read a short passage of scripture together.

Then try practicing a bit of free-form spontaneous prayer out loud in your own private prayer time when you’re away from H2B. Makes it easier to do when you’re together.

How about starting with the Our Father? H2B can then add his prayer. Bring it on home with a rousing Glory Be. :wink:

Seriously, I think just mixing it up is good. He might like the meditative element of the Rosary once he tries it. You might like the "off-the-cuff prayers once you’re comfortable expressing yourself on the spot.

From what I’ve seen and read, most people who pray “off-the-cuff” have a limited tool kit, too. They tend to use the same formula and expressions over and over again. It’s probably not as off-the-cuff and original (every time) as it seems at first.

uh oh

Thanks for the suggestions, I like the idea of praying the psalms!

Maybe say the chaplet of divince mercy together? It focuses on the passion of our lord jesus christ.

Also maybe explain the rosary to him, he may not understand why/how we pray it. But if you explain it, he may want to try it?

Yes will try that. I have explained the rosary to him, being a reflection of the life of Christ and offering our prayer to His Mother to intercede for us, I think he understood until I got the Glorious Mysteries, he of course raised his eyebrows when I mentioned the Assumption of Our Lady and the Crowning of Our Lady Queen of Heaven!!

Well if he uderstands that you are praying to her for her intercession (presumably is ok with that) then surely those mysteries shouldn’t be a problem?

Another suggestion would be to say the stations of the cross. It’s all focused on christ, he shouldn;t have a problem with that.

Funny you mention that, after Mass a few weeks ago he asked what ‘all those pictures on the walls’ were?

I explained them to him but didn’t think to ask if he would consider saying them? :doh2:

Thanks, I wasn’t sure where to start but I have plenty to start with!

Goodluck! I will pray for you. :highprayer:

Yes!! His prayers and his family’s are generally Lord we thank you for (insert) and we ask you for (insert). Nothing wrong with that of course!

He had never heard of the Glory Be until a few weeks ago!

DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit