I work at a Catholic University in ny and I get free tuition for my 2 eldest who would start next year. They don’t care where they go to college because they don’t know yet the weight of a college loan.
We planned me working there for the free tuition years ago. Fast forward 5 years and the baby is born, possibly my last baby (I’m 44) and the last CAF post I made some time ago regarding this everyone made me feel great because they supported my husband and mine new plan of moving to an affordable home away from the city so I can finally say home and raise this baby. (My greatest desire since my first child 20 years ago was to be a stay at home mother).
Well my son just returned from the military and is struggling to find work and is talking about taking college now (he’s Reserves so the military pays only partial) and all of a sudden it hit me that I’m being selfish only thinking about wanting to care full time for the baby when these older kids need my help too.
My husband (who I’m trying to let lead…it’s difficult as he even leans on me for decision making…said to me once “we have to think about them too”)
I’ll be honest, I’m so sick and tired of having worked and going outside to work away from my kids to a secular culture I just want to raise this baby.
I sense I’m not thinking clearly and appreciate levelheaded insight. When I mentioned this to my husband last night he said “Yeah maybe we should reconsider maybe they should go a year”. Well that was a shock because for the past year we were saving and planning for me to finally stay home.
I will be praying hard, frankly I’m just numb from exhaustion, not physical but the exhaustion of 20 years taking care and sacrificing and the one chance I thought I had to finally stay home I realized I may be doing a disservice to my other older children.
Thank you all for your advice.
edit- older kids ages are 19 and 17