Priest asked if I was catholic


I go to mass every Sunday. My daughter is an altar server who goes with me. I am coming into the faith in the RCIA program after having grown up born again Christian. Today when the mass was ending the father was walking down the middle and stopped and whispered into my ear if I was catholic. I responded to him I was not but in the RICA classes. I always go up for a blessing during communion. At the end of my I asked him why he questioned my. He gave me a rather confusing answer. He said he noticed I always go up for a blessing and that something wasn’t proper? I told him my girlfriend is also in RICA, only sometimes comes to mass, and that we planned to get married by church after. When I mentioned my daughter had done her first communion he seemed satisfied.

But I’m still left confused on the whole matter and kinda feel shamed in a way. I think next time I won’t go to get a blessing until I get all the sacraments. Can someone clarify my situation about what he might of meant? Also he is a father who comes to that parish to do mass every other time. Thanks.


I would be off put by that too… I would like to know what others think as well. It’s okay to get a blessing when you’re going through the RCIA. My church encourages it. I think you should still continue to get blessed. Maybe he assumed you were already Catholic? Many blessings. Good luck on your journey.


He may simply have not known you were in RCIA and was wondering why you ever only go up for a blessing. You could have not had a chance to go to confession or could not receive communion for another reason. As for the blessing thing, receiving a blessing in the communion line is an American thing. In other countries you would be expected to remain in the pew during communion. The reasoning is that communion is for communion, and you’ll receive a blessing anyway at the end of Mass. That may be why he said it wasn’t proper.


The CDW issued this statement a few years ago:

Basically, the Communion Line is not the place for individual blessings, the document lists the whys. Everyone receives a blessing at the end of Mass.

Your daughter is old enough to receive, unless she has some special needs, I would imagine she can approach on her own. Might want to sit near the end of the aisle near the front. You could stay in the pew and make a Spiritual Communion looking forward to the day very soon when you will be fully joined to the Church


Maybe it was out of concern? People can get overlooked or neglected.

A priest once told me that after settling into his new parish, he noticed a lovely lady who sat at the back who never received the Eucharist. Eventually he had the opportunity to talk to her and discovered she had been attending mass there for years. When he asked her why she did not receive the Eucharist, she said that she wasn’t a catholic. He asked her why she wasn’t catholic, and she replied “No one ever asked me”. This awesome elderly lady had been overlooked by everyone and after she had been received into the Church she blossomed into an awesome mainstay of the parish. When I first came across her, I was warned to leave her alone because she doesn’t like to join in and talk! Needless to say, I ignored that and discovered that she did like to join in but was a quiet lady who liked to listen and help people.


One possibility that occurs to me. The priest had assumed that you were Catholic and therefore was wondering why you only ever go up for a blessing, not for Holy Communion. Your answer will have satisfied his curiosity and allayed his doubts. Now you’re fair and square.


I agree that he was probably just trying to make sure your needs are being meet.

I remember a friend of mine telling me a story about going on a pilgrimage while she was in RCIA. She attended Mass every day but didn’t receive communion. The priest approached her to let her know very gently that he was available if she needed to go to confession. She explained that she wasn’t yet Catholic and all was well.


My old parish priest asked me as well as I didn’t receive Holy Communion. Just said that I wasn’t Catholic yet and he responded that if I had questions I could talk with him if I wanted to. When I had been received into the Church and didn’t receive Holy Communion one weekday Mass he asked me why. Less than a minute later I was in the confessional. He took his task seriously in helping people become saints. :rofl:


If you’re still confused, I suggest sending him a polite email. Often their contact information can be found in the parish bulletin or website.
It sounds like he caught you off guard, go ahead and tell him that. Tell him how much you enjoy Mass and enjoy going up for a blessing. Now you’re unsure and feel you’re doing something wrong?
Be kind, but be honest and tell him what he said left you feeling a little off-kilter as a person in RCIA that is still learning. I think it would benefit both of you to straighten this out. God bless.


[quote=“Fauken, post:3, topic:520814, full:true”]

As for the blessing thing, receiving a blessing in the communion line is an American thing. In other countries you would be expected to remain in the pew during communion. [/quote]

No, it’s not an American thing. It is actively encouraged in the UK, for instance, and has been since the 1970s.


Perhaps since he sees you there a lot he was going to ask if you needed reconciliation.

When I was in RCIA at my second mass ever the guy in the pew behind me kicked me to try to get me to go up for communion. Sort of like “wakey wakey”. Of course I didn’t go, but my point is, who cares people think all sorts of things. Some good some bad just assume the best and don’t worry about it.


His asking you that is odd, and IMO, improper, but maybe now that he knows you and your girlfriend are in RCIA, plan to marry in the Church and your daughter has had her first Communion there he won’t have anymore questions for you when going up for a blessing.


Thank you everyone for all the comments. It put my mind at ease. I kinda thinking maybe he wonder why I would always get a blessing and not the Eucharist if I was catholic.

I’m am excited and pleased to be in RCIA. It’s been an awesome experience so far. The sister in charge is very knowledgeable. :innocent:


SOOOOOOOOOOOOO glad you’re coming into the Catholic Church!


Receiving a blessing in the communion line is also an Australian thing.


This. The Priest was probably concerned for your soul. In a good way. They are charged with care of our souls

Welcome home!


I’m surprised your priest didn’t know you were in RCIA. Our priest made a point of visiting the class to get to know us.


Wow! It’s improper for a priest to ask a parishioner if he’s Catholic? Sounds like he was just confused and wanted to clarify his status.


…and a german thing :wink: My mum told me it was also common in her childhood in germany in the early 1960´s. It was always a bit strange for me as the practice here is to cross your arms over your bust when you are only there for a blessing, not for recieving communion. When I became orthodox, I realized they do it the other way - you cross your arms over your bust when you want to recieve communion…


How about… see the full half of the glass and enjoy the attention. Maybe he wantes to know why you don’t receive communion too and maybe you were too stuck and shy to go confession so you can receive it.
It doesn’t need all to be thought-police and Inquisition you know.
Some people are sad that they joined a new parish and the priest ignores them.

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