LAREDO, Texas (KGNS) - A Texas lawmaker hopes to keep couples together by ending ‘no-fault’ divorces.
Domestic violence and female suicide decrease when no-fault divorce is allowed.
I think it’s silly to make people jump through hoops to get out of an agreement made strictly between the only two people that made the agreement. The state only recognizes that a marriage has taken place, they have nothing to do with the actual marriage nor should they have anything to do with it’s dissolution except for recognizing that the union no longer exists.
As the relative of several abused women, this is a horrible idea.
That’s good news but I’m afraid the damage has already been done.
Just as with abc, the genie is out the bottle. This move would cause great harm.
Prior to so-called No-Fault Divorce, a real cause had to be shown to get a divorce. Then, out of thin air, it’s nobody’s fault?
And people think women in relationships outside of marriage aren’t abused or even men?
A properly written bill that includes signs of abuse and an examination of both parties by a trained third party would be a good idea. When the woman is battered and bruised and it’s obvious, the man or whoever, should be forced out of the picture by law. His state of mind and her state of mind need to be examined. Marriage is a good thing for most people but some divorce for frivolous reasons or because they were never taught proper conflict resolution.
The quickest road to poverty in this country is being an unwed mother. And boys are not taught to be good men or good fathers or are told it doesn’t matter. Only the sex does. That’s perverse. That’s dysfunctional.
There is a foreign country I will not name that has a small team of “family helpers.” If a wife is being treated badly, she can go to them. I watched this on TV. Everyone knows who they are and respect them. They don’t barge in but knock on the door and ask permission to come in. The husband was asked some questions about things they were told. Were they true? These men were not confrontational and the husband answered truthfully. His wife cried a little in the background. It was verbal not physical abuse. He told his wife he was sorry and told the team he would do better to control his outbursts which he admitted were caused by outside stress, not her. Once the air was cleared, both husband and wife thanked them.
That was in a Third World country. I think we can be as smart.
It’s not simply what we think, the numbers are there. Here is one study (or at least a summary of the study): Divorce Laws and Family Violence
Honestly, that anecdote scares me a bit. I don’t know the country it is or who these shadowy men are but I think that as soon as they left the woman would pay dearly for telling on him. What is the rate of domestic violence, female suicide, and murder of females by a spouse in this country? That could be helpful.
What is the rate of male suicide and domestic abuse, or murder by their spouses?
Male suicide rates are quite high from my understanding. I think domestic abuse against men is relatively uncommon, however.
See my revised post #8 for a link.
Often, people would agree which spouse would be the “cheater” and create documentation that made it appear there had been cheating. Of course, that could end up ruining their reputation
Some states had ‘irreconcilable differences’ instead of having to show adultery or abuse.
And then there was Las Vegas, where people went to get divorces when they couldn’t get one in their own state.
No-Fault just means you don’t have to air your dirty laundry in a court of law.
It also means that you don’t have to show valid reason to divorce someone. It means that I can now chose to divorce my wife because she’s not pretty or young enough anymore, or because I don’t like the way she cooks. Or, she could divorce me because I don’t mow the lawn often enough, or because I don’t do enough of the housework.
Does this mean that government may not be the answer to a problem? :eek:
Honesty is a good policy. We now have “do it yourself divorce.” Another step backwards. Find a way to make relationships work before marriage. For Catholics, a mandatory pre-marriage retreat. Not, “I had to kick my husband out of my house because I found out he was a nut.” This from a gorgeous, 6 foot, 1, 33 year old. “How long were you married?” Nine months. Or the therapist who told me about an unnnamed client who came in for a session and announced she was divorcing her husband. There was no previous issue, so the therapist asked what happened. “He yelled at me.”
Or my friend who worked with a woman who had a husband. He later found out, through casual conversation, that the couple weren’t married but she insisted on calling him her husband. One day, she announced she was leaving him. Time together? 10 years.
And so on.
Yep. No-fault, unilateral divorce makes a mockery of marriage.
The problem with hypotheticals like these is that they’re just so divorced from reality. Sure, two people could divorce for such reasons, but why would they want to after going through the effort of getting married and trying to live a life together? The fact is that no normal person would divorce their spouse for such a reason, and if that’s the reason they cite then there are clearly other issues at hand.
On top of that, people shouldn’t be forced to remain together by the state or anyone. Relationships should only exist as long as it’s something that both partners want. Even in this fictional world where people divorce simply over housework, I really don’t see why that should be prevented if it’s what those involved want.
The solution? Force them to stay together! Voluntary association and private enterprise in the economy, overbearing state regulations in the family!
The researchers said they didn’t see any affect on abuse, murder, or suicide of males. It doesn’t seem to be connected to divorce.
I remember reading that if you remove spousal abuse, men are more likely to suffer violence in family situations and is more likely to be murdered by a family member than women. That’s only after you remove spousal abuse and murder. I don’t have a link though, it’s just from memory. I think male suicide is a real problem that needs to be addressed. None of this appears to be connected to divorce from what I’ve read.
No kidding, talk about big government.:eek: