I think for some people–OK, let me speak of what I know–for some women pleasure can be easily derived from intercourse and for some women, it’s a bit trickier. We are all built a little differently, and so are men. Some women may never reach orgasm without some external stimuation (a lot of those fabulous little nerve endings may not be in places where a penis spends much time), and for others it’s not the only way to orgasm, but it’s nice. It really doesn’t take fancy equipment to stimulate those places, but there’s nothing especially wrong with finding a useful tool for the job either. There’s a danger, true, of addiction at the extreme, or, more subtly, of letting the easy O become the only effort put into the sexual relationship. But, like a glass of wine, which can also become a minor crutch or a life shattering addiction, there’s nothing inherently wrong with a sex toy as an aid to marital intercourse.
That said, is there any particular reason why a person not yet married needs to educate him or herself about such things? I tend to think not. Newlywed sex isn’t about orgasms, really, although they can be in great supply at that time. It’s about union of shared pleasure and shared future. It’s so great that even without an orgasm it still leaves you all glowy and happy (or at least that was my experience as a woman, who frequently had orgasms in those newlywed years, and occasionally did not). You don’t want to bulldoze that innocence. But eventually it is replaced with needing to feel like your spouse knows you. Whether or not a couple will benefit from experimentation with or without sex aids at that point kind of depends on who they are, what they like, and how they are built. The more sex you have the more you will need to talk about it, and I don’t see any reason why “vibrator” should be a taboo word in those conversations. If, on the other hand, you and your spouse need to talk more openly, and instead you just buy a sex toy, eventually the problem will resurface.
It sounds like this is something you really don’t need right now, and may never need to explore at all. So don’t bother with it. But there’s no need to be morally outraged by it either. It’s not like you are being asked to sell bouquets of condoms as a hall fundraiser (which I was asked to do as a freshman, and obviously had to refuse).