I hope I’m posting this in the right place, especially since it’s my first proper post on the forums. I’m only just starting out on my journey to become a Catholic and because I’m a born worrier, I don’t want to ask my Priest something which might be seen as really obvious or stupid… so I thought I’d pester you lovely people first.
My boyfriend and I have been discussing marriage ever since he made an impromptu ring out of a Starbucks straw wrapper and proposed in the middle of an airport last year (I of course said yes, but asked for the ring to at least be upgraded to a Haribo jelly one) but since I started thinking about becoming a Catholic, a couple of things have been weighing heavily on my mind.
Firstly, nearly everything I’ve read has said that the main purpose of marriage is to have children but due to a combination of medical issues I had to have a hysterectomy when I was 21. Neither me nor my lovely boyfriend have ever felt the call to be parents (we’re quite looking forward to when our siblings have kids though, so we get to be the cool aunt and uncle) but as far as the Church is concerned, would there be any point in us still getting married? Especially when there’s so much emphasis on accepting children from God and being a good parent in the Nuptial Blessing.
Secondly, does a marriage still count if either party isn’t a virgin? I ask because although I was committed to sex being purely for marriage (otherwise, to me anyway, it just seemed like a day for huge dresses and cake) even before I was called by God, I had the choice of chastity taken away from me when I was 18. Although my boyfriend has been amazingly supportive and says that it only makes him love me more (also, he’s Catholic too so there have been no err… pre-marital shenanigans) I just worry that with that and me not being able to have children, it might make our marriage seem pointless from a spiritual point of view.
I’m just feeling incredibly conflicted because although I know that this is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with, I wouldn’t want to make a mockery out of a Sacrament.
Urch, that probably made no sense but if anyone can decipher my blathering and could offer any advice, it would be most gratefully received. Even if it is bad news.