Questions on lust


#1

What can a man do , to remove lust in his heart . I’m sure there are many others who live with this . I see women and all of a sudden there is some form of lust in my heart , I pray ask to be forgiven but what on earth can I do . In todays society ( not saying we need to liver in the 1800’s) the way women dress in schools , clubs , malls , church even , Im also not blaming women , See im confused. what can I do ? I cant relieve it so I must be plauged by it . If there was any sin that is the hardest its that of sexual lust . Any tips ?


#2

Temptation is not sin itself. Nothing to confess. Now giving in is another matter.

It is crucial to monitor what you allow to enter your mind and soul. IMO, immdoestly dressed women would not present as much problems if we men watched less TV, trashy movies, skipped trashy parts of books, didn’t buy secular magazines and generally overwhelm ourselves with entirely non-necessary ‘culture of depravity’ propaganda. Instead spend more time in prayer, sacraments and reading supportive to virtue.

But we’ll likely never be fully rid of lust 'till we’re dead.


#3

I’m married and still, at times have similiar temptations. Alot changed for me when I really made up my mind not to give into such a thing. I stay away from all that leads me in that direction. TV, chat rooms, IT sites, bars, whatever. And I learned to grab my rosary first chance I had when I was tempted. After a while, it becomes a habit and is easier to stay pure. It’s not impossible but very difficult at times. Remember to go to confession and never give up. I fail at times still, but not like I used to. Thank God for that.


#4

It may help to remind yourself that every female is a creation of God, and a sister in the Lord through God’s eyes. Likewise, appreciate and remind yourself that this female is some parents’ daughter and how would you like it if men were looking lustfully at your own grown daughter (whether you have children or not).You should be finding a growing disdain, repugnancy, of entertaining lustful thoughts of a female with this reality mindset. Ultimately and firstly, you simply want to give your eyes and thought production over to Jesus and expectantly pray for the gift of chastity–he wants this and will honor this desire/prayer as you trust and turn yourself and desires over to Him.

For a last resort you can always try this --*** *“And if your eye causes you to sin, pluck it out. Better for you to enter into the kingdom of God with one eye than with two eyes to be thrown into Gehenna”(Mark Chapter 9:47) just kidding.


#5

This brings to mind a story my father heard from an old priest he knew.

The older priest was sitting outside with a young priest (I think the young priest had only been a priest a few days). Anyway the young priest turned to the older one and asked whenhe would ever stop being tempted to lust over women. To which the older priest replyed “About three hours after your dead”.

The point of what the older priest was saying is that you will never be able to totally stop feeling the temptation to lust over women.

What you need to do is to pray, for forgiveness, but also for the grace to be able to avoid sin.(I personaly find that the rosary is very helpful)


#6

Do three things:

  1. Fast–meaning in this case doing what is called keeping “custody of the eyes”. Stop gawking at girls or images of girls that you know will get you worked up.

  2. Flee from occasions of sin and temptation. You can usually know what gets you worked up in advance. Anticipate and avoid.

  3. PRAY. The very nanosecond you get those impure thoughts bouncing in your head, kill 'em with a mental axe and immeditately ask Our Immaculate Mother Mary to obtain the virtue of purity for you. It works.

Scott


#7

Lust is a bit different than something like gluttony. In gluttony you can just avoid the thing that is tempting you. In lust your dealing with people. If you avoid people, then you are not able to love them like we are called to do. So the above advice is very good, pray, fast, and avoid the near occasion of sin. If you want to decrease one of the capital sins, it is also needed to increase the corasponding virtue. So don’t isolate yourself, find as many people as you can to care about.

One of the problems with lust is that it makes an object out of someone. So by seeking others to care about well grounded in love, you will not see others so much as objects that’ll give you pleasure. One problem is that, and probably especailly as a male with our extra ability of detachement from the situation, is that it seems like we our fully capable of both – objectifying someone and look at another as a person. But as you increase your love of the other, you increase your ability to actually care for the other.

Working at a department store, I have no choice but to walk pass the intament appearal area. Now those women in those pictures look very tempting. But when you think about it, very few who ever will put on that stuff will look near as good. (For that matter few who wear the stuff in the mens area will look near as good as the ones in those pictures either.) Now just think, I’m sure you know tons of women and they are all very special and very much worthy of their own dignity. Just think of all the women here or your mother, sister, or daughter, how great they are regardless of how they look. Now maybe they are as good looking as those in those pictures, but after think of how much special they are with their own dignity, they too desearve not lust but for us to care about them. To a certain point, their good looks are not such a great blessing, because just imagain how many people will give them attention, but with lustful intentions.

So continue to pray, fast, confess and avoid near sin. Look to our Lord to give you the grace for you to open yourself up to a burning love for the other. Your surrender to the Lord is beatiful music to His ears. Then care for the other, male, female, young, old, children, elderly, lonely, friend-full :-), sick, and healthy. If your in solidarity with others, you will suffer and care for them and not want to use them. Much easier advice to write than to say, but with little steps one can eventuall move great distances


#8

[quote=manualman]Temptation is not sin itself. Nothing to confess.
[/quote]

Jesus disagrees with you.

MATTHEW
27 You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ 28 But I say to you, everyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.


#9

[quote=Michael’s Sword]Jesus disagrees with you.

MATTHEW
27 You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall not commit adultery.’ 28 But I say to you, everyone who looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
[/quote]

And since we all know Jesus was tempted and yet is sinless in His human nature we can draw from that – that receiving a temptation is not the “sin” - giving in to it, obsessing over the lust, dwelling on it, indulging in it is the sin. Thus one tempted, who seeks recourse from that temptation is sinless.


#10

I’m not hijacking the thread, but I have a question in this vein: I wish to obtain a plenary indulgence during the Year of the Eucharist. I know all that I have to do, but I also have to be “free from the attachment to sin.” Does that mean I’m not even tempted?


#11

[quote=JKirkLVNV]I’m not hijacking the thread, but I have a question in this vein: I wish to obtain a plenary indulgence during the Year of the Eucharist. I know all that I have to do, but I also have to be “free from the attachment to sin.” Does that mean I’m not even tempted?
[/quote]

No it does not - temptation is part of the human condition - to give in to it is the sin, not the temptation. Christ Himself is tempted, it is the tale of the Transfiguration.


#12

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