I’m looking for some advice. I would like to start by saying that I don’t consider myself racist, there have been times in the past where I have made racial jokes or remarks which I’ve since realized are wrong, however recently I have realized that I find that I feel more confident around people who are not of my race and am wondering if this could be considered racist. What I mean by this is when it comes to interacting with people, and I’m not sure if this is the right word, but I feel more dominant and intern confident when interacting with people who are foreign. Whether this be in regards to conversing with some, meeting someone new, talking to a girl or even confession.
For example, there have been times at confession when the priest has been foreign and I have felt more confident and comfortable in the confessional, as opposed to times when the priest has been of the same race as me and I’ve felt less comfortable and confident. Whether this is due to experiencing a feeling of dominance I’m not sure, however I don’t like using this word as it sounds wrong. The same can be applied to other scenarios in life.
That been said, I’ve experienced the same feeling when interacting with someone, regardless of their race, that I’m more confident, out spoken and physically bigger then. For example when hanging out with friends there have been times when a mutual friend of my mates has been bigger, more confident and out spoken then me and as a result I have felt shy and insecure. Then there have been times when it’s been the other way around and I have felt more confident.
Thanks for reading what I had to say.