Raising Kids Catholic

Message changed from when does a believer baptism disqualify you from ordination into the priesthood or religious life (aka Permanent Deacon) to how to raise your kids Catholic.

Talk to the diocesan vocations director


Thanks. Just praying to have kids some day and hope to raise them Catholic even if they are baptized in an evangelical church. Than I can have them go thru RCIC and get caught up in the Catholic faith, despite a believer baptism at 7-8 years old. Thanks so much for the encouragement.

Why would you do this? Why not just raise your children Catholic? Am I missing something?



Thank you. I agree. I plan to raise them Catholic as is my duty as a Catholic gentleman, but I also must respect my wife’s wishes to make sure our kids grow up Catholic Christians.

My wife is an Evangelical Protestant so we attend a non-denominational church and a Catholic church every Sunday - well she attends most Sundays. The believer baptism would be for family harmony and I’d plan to get my children into the Catholic church as soon as they’re believers and hopefully could have them participate in children’s liturgy even before that occurs. Than RCIC than hopefully CCD.

I don’t think the Catholic church would baptize a child without both parents consenting to it.

You should really discuss this with your priest before moving forward with any of this if/when the day comes. In fact, it would probably be wise for you and your wife to discuss with a priest’s guidance before having children.

Your heart seems to be in the right place from what I gather, but you have some misunderstandings about Catholic baptism, ordination, and family harmony from a healthy Catholic marriage perspective to sort out.


Are you and your wife married in the Church? You would’ve had to have agreed to raise your children Catholic at the time of the marriage. This is part of the request for the dispensation that is necessary to marry a non-Catholic.

As for both parents consenting, there must be a founded hope the children will be raised Catholic in order to baptize them.

What you are intending to do is highly irregular. You really need to sit down with your priest and talk about this. This is not how you are supposed to go about baptizing and educating your children in the faith.



Thank you. I have. The priest was very helpful. I chose to marry a non-Catholic.

Yes. I was married in the Catholic church via a dispensation because even though I married in a Methodist church, I had a Catholic officiant there and followed the necessary requirements.

You’re correct. My intent is to teach my child about Catholicism and to raise them as such where they attend mass weekly. My hope is to get them in CCD as quickly as possible. I am open and want to get my child baptized Catholic, but I also need to respect my wife’s wishes and her belief in believer’s baptism vs infant baptism. I have to raise the kids Catholic - she doesn’t. I also intend to raise them Catholic without reservation - aka if she agreed to have them baptized as infants, I would do so with immediacy. Also if the church knew I’d raise them Catholic and allowed me to have them baptized, I’d do so provided I could do so without disunity in the home. We’re doing Fulfilled together.

Obviously, but she can’t put anything in the way. It would do the children a grave disservice to have them baptized and raised as Catholics, only to have them baptized again later on in a “believers baptism.” It would cause them confusion. What are you going to do, tell them “go along with it to make Mom happy?” Not exactly a recipe for a good faith life nor for domestic tranquility. You really need to talk to your priest. The arrangement you’re anticipating will only lead to problems.


How could this possibly not result in disunity in the home, particularly if you’re having them baptized twice, or delaying baptism until it can be done in the Evangelical church and then putting them through RCIC?


True. I agree. Of the nearly six years, we’ve been together, including 3 years married, I can faithfully say she hasn’t. Most likely, our children would be baptized at 7 or 8 years old since she believes in believer baptism and I don’t expect that to change.

Because we generally have agreement and I know what she believes and what I believe and what the Catholic Church will require for baptism. She definitely wants the kids to be raised Christian and I want them to be raised as Catholic Christians. We both agree to see where there’s commonality and to explain why there are differences and why she has a Dallas Theological Seminary position and I have a Catholic position.

So why do you feel the need to plan on this situation being split like this? It sounds like she’s either already insisted that this is how it will be, or else you’re afraid to broach the subject and will just let things happen as they happen. Am I getting a good read on things?


What is a “Catholic Christian?”


Yes. You have a good read.

A Catholic is a Christian. Christian means Christ follower. Our Catholic faith is how someone should practice their Christianity.

So stop speculating and talk to your wife about this.

If you really mean it on Sunday when you say “I acknowledge one baptism for the forgiveness of sins,” and if you really meant it when you promised to raise your children Catholic, then you won’t go ahead with plans to do what you’re saying you’re going to.

Has she insisted, or is this just your speculation?


Whaaat? :thinking:

Sounds like you trying to make up a term that your wife won’t object to. Are you really trying to explain to someone that Catholics are Christian?

“Catholic Christian” is redundant.

No she knows that Catholics are Christians. Some members of her church, though, don’t know this or don’t want to believe this (some former Catholics unfortunately).

Why do you care what they think?

Look, you need to lead by example. You sound like you are trying to be P.C. Pray that your wife has a conversion.


We believe in one baptism for the forgiveness of sins.I believe baptism is necessary for salvation. She believes it’s a profession of faith. All I know is once my kid(s) are baptized, they can go to CCD or RCIC. They can get the Catholic education I’d want them to get - of course, the biggest contribution comes from the parents.

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