I am curious to see how everyone was raised and is raising their children in terms of the rules in place around the home. How much freedom do/did you give your children? Did your approach work? Were you too strict or too lax?
How much freedom did you have growing up?
From a personal standpoint…
My parents gave me a lot of freedom and more so as I continued to show responsibility/trustworthiness. I am very grateful for this because I would not have done well with very controlling or restrictive parents and I think I probably would have rebelled a bit.
When I was growing up I never had a curfew and could pretty much hangout with my friends as I pleased as long as I told my parents where I was going and who would be with me. They had the phone numbers of my friend’s houses if they needed them, but they never had to call. If plans changed where I road my bike somewhere else or when we were of driving age, we would use a pay phone (pre-cell phone days) to update our parents as to where we were. I didn’t have any restrictions as to how late I could be out. I was very good at time management and was always able to get my school work done well.
Even though I probably could have got into trouble if I wanted to, I never did. I stayed chaste, I didn’t underage drink or attend any parties where I was at risk of getting into trouble for being around others engaging in some sort of behavior that could be bad.
I think this helped me to be prepared for college where it was not much a change to be living in an environment where I could make all my own choices.
On the contrary, I have seen the too much freedom approach fail with others, as well as, being too strict not work out well. So that is why I am interested to hear other experiences.