Rant about "Dear Abby" and her misinformation about homosexuality

I was reading the paper the other day and came across a column by Abigail Van Buren (Dear Abby). She was responding to a woman who was asking her advise about what to do with her teenage daughter “coming out” as a lesbian at age 14. Abby responded with a typical liberal, pro-gay agenda answer. I quote a portion of her response: “It is extremely important that you come to terms with your own feelings about homosexuality. It is not uncommon for the parents of a gay child to feel guilt or shame, when in truth, it has nothing to do with the quality of their parenting ***and everything to do with genetics”. ***Putting aside the normal confusion issues that come with adolescence, what infuriates me is that last portion that I quoted in bold. Why does the media keep hammering home the genetics-only cause for homosexuality when in fact the evidence strongly suggests otherwise. Even the researchers of the studies that they base their claims on don’t acknowledge a biology-based cause for homosexuality - not to mention the incredibly flawed nature of the studies in question and the lack of replication by other researchers. According to biogenetist Neil Whitehead, perhaps less than 5% of homosexuals have a biological predisposition to becoming gay (due to gender nonconformity issues). Why can’t someone effectively counter the liberal gay propaganda about gay genes and get the truth out to the masses - why is this so hard?

[quote=Riley259]I was reading the paper the other day and came across a column by Abigail Van Buren (Dear Abby). She was responding to a woman who was asking her advise about what to do with her teenage daughter “coming out” as a lesbian at age 14. Abby responded with a typical liberal, pro-gay agenda answer. I quote a portion of her response: “It is extremely important that you come to terms with your own feelings about homosexuality. It is not uncommon for the parents of a gay child to feel guilt or shame, when in truth, it has nothing to do with the quality of their parenting ***and everything to do with genetics”. ***Putting aside the normal confusion issues that come with adolescence, what infuriates me is that last portion that I quoted in bold. Why does the media keep hammering home the genetics-only cause for homosexuality when in fact the evidence strongly suggests otherwise. Even the researchers of the studies that they base their claims on don’t acknowledge a biology-based cause for homosexuality - not to mention the incredibly flawed nature of the studies in question and the lack of replication by other researchers. According to biogenetist Neil Whitehead, perhaps less than 5% of homosexuals have a biological predisposition to becoming gay (due to gender nonconformity issues). Why can’t someone effectively counter the liberal gay propaganda about gay genes and get the truth out to the masses - why is this so hard?
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Because the homosexual activists have successfully equated perverted behavior with racial prejudice, thereby creating a new “protected class.” People are more afraid to be called a bigot these days than almost anything else. Political correctness is raised to an art form.

Amazing how two percent of the population who are engaged in an unhealthy behavior pattern have been elevated to some kind of honored group.

LIsa N

Didn’t Abby or her sister rail against and slander the Polish Pope without any consequences to their career?

Is “Dear Abby” still alive? Somehow I thought she died a couple of years ago – in which case this would be a repeat or someone else continuing her column. Or am I just crazy?

I have to say, I feel like homosexuals get a lot harsher treatment from many Christians than other sinners – especially since most homosexuals have no control over their sexual orientation (and usually spend a long time denying their orientation and/or wishing desperately that they were not gay). Sure, they can remain celibate, but that’s asking a lot, when the possibility of love is right there in front of them. Homosexuals I have known have not tried to force their agenda (or their attentions) on me or anyone else; they just ask for the same rights other Americans have.

If you ask me, heterosexual adulterers represent a far greater threat to family life, yet nowhere near the same level of vicious condemnation is directed against them. I’m curious – how many people who are posting against homosexuality here can say they know one or more gay people fairly well? I only ask, because it seems to me that generally understanding tends to develop alongside familiarity (which does not mean your basic values change; a sin is a sin, but one can have more or less empathy toward the sinner.)

[quote=gnosys]Is “Dear Abby” still alive? Somehow I thought she died a couple of years ago – in which case this would be a repeat or someone else continuing her column. Or am I just crazy?

I have to say, I feel like homosexuals get a lot harsher treatment from many Christians than other sinners – especially since most homosexuals have no control over their sexual orientation (and usually spend a long time denying their orientation and/or wishing desperately that they were not gay). Sure, they can remain celibate, but that’s asking a lot, when the possibility of love is right there in front of them. Homosexuals I have known have not tried to force their agenda (or their attentions) on me or anyone else; they just ask for the same rights other Americans have.

If you ask me, heterosexual adulterers represent a far greater threat to family life, yet nowhere near the same level of vicious condemnation is directed against them. I’m curious – how many people who are posting against homosexuality here can say they know one or more gay people fairly well? I only ask, because it seems to me that generally understanding tends to develop alongside familiarity (which does not mean your basic values change; a sin is a sin, but one can have more or less empathy toward the sinner.)
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I know many “gay” people well and have for years. Are you implying that feelings trump truth or being desensitized to a disorder will help one become “enlightened”?

It is true heterosexuals are sinners and have done much to help decay our culture, that is one reason why so many of us want to halt the “gay” agenda. It would be just more decline. We need to stop the “gay” agenda and then start reversing heterosexual decay.

[quote=swampfox]Didn’t Abby or her sister rail against and slander the Polish Pope without any consequences to their career?
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Which has what to do with the current conversation about homosexuality? What’s the nexus?

Doesn’t everyone (or at least almost everyone) understand that heterosexual adulterers are wrong? It’s becoming a lot more difficult to find people who understand that homosexual acts are a sin, so I think that may be why the topic is more emotional. Both sides have strong feelings and the topic is also controversial.

As for “vicious condemnation,” I think that’s a bit harsh. I don’t condem any homosexual person, let alone viciously.

I have posted about this before (not on this thread) and will try to explain where I am coming from. As someone who was not raised Catholic, I never understood why there were people who thought there was something wrong with being homosexual. I had gay friends, and in my view they were just ordinary people who sought love with members of the same sex.

I had heard that the Bible mentioned something about homosexuality being wrong, but I was sure that either the Bible was being misinterpreted or it was clouded by the beliefs of the people who wrote it - I had also heard it said some pretty sexist things about women.

The Church’s teaching on homosexuality was BY FAR the most difficult teaching for me to deal with. I went to Mass weekly and started an RCIA program in college, and I thought seriously about dropping out of the program for this very issue. I walked out of a daily Mass because I was crying after a priest talked about the sin of homosexuality.

I didn’t want to think that my friends were doing something that harmed them. Even worse, I didn’t know how to help them if they were.

The priest at my college is an excellent man. He called me on the phone the same day I walked out of daily Mass and offered to talk with me about the issue. He didn’t try to talk me into believing, mostly he just listened and answered my questions. I was surrounded by this priest and others in the Catholic community, and I saw that they were not bigots who had never met a homosexual. They were the kindest, most compassionate people I had ever known. They spoke plainly about their problems with same-sex marriage. I began to listen after that priest listened to me.

I began to see the connection between the fact that all sexual acts outside of marriage are sins and the importance of the definition of marriage as a union between one man and one woman. It was also important for me to see that the Catholic Church did not deny access to people with same-sex attractions - it merely called them to live chastely, as it called all of its members to live chastely.

It is much harder for me to understand that homosexual acts are a sin than it was to ignore this harsh reality. My best friend from high school recently told me that she has decided to “try being gay,” even though she thinks it might be, in her definition, a “phase.” Even now she says she is confused about her sexuality, although she goes to the gay club every weekend, has had a serious girlfriend and has dated a lot of other girls. I have seen some of the causes of her growing same-sex attraction - her father’s inappropriate behavior, her parents’ impending divorce, her flawed romantic relationships with men and encouragement from her peers to be gay.

She is struggling, she is hurting and the push from her friends is to continue to be homosexual even though I have never seen her so confused or depressed. It is not about her not being accepted for her homosexuality either because she is overwhelmingly accepted.

God bless.

[quote=gnosys]Is “Dear Abby” still alive? Somehow I thought she died a couple of years ago – in which case this would be a repeat or someone else continuing her column. Or am I just crazy?

I have to say, I feel like homosexuals get a lot harsher treatment from many Christians than other sinners – especially since most homosexuals have no control over their sexual orientation (and usually spend a long time denying their orientation and/or wishing desperately that they were not gay). Sure, they can remain celibate, but that’s asking a lot, when the possibility of love is right there in front of them. Homosexuals I have known have not tried to force their agenda (or their attentions) on me or anyone else; they just ask for the same rights other Americans have.

If you ask me, heterosexual adulterers represent a far greater threat to family life, yet nowhere near the same level of vicious condemnation is directed against them. I’m curious – how many people who are posting against homosexuality here can say they know one or more gay people fairly well? I only ask, because it seems to me that generally understanding tends to develop alongside familiarity (which does not mean your basic values change; a sin is a sin, but one can have more or less empathy toward the sinner.)
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Her daughter took over the column after she died a couple of years ago. I know, work with and am friends with several openly gay people. I respect them as friends and professionals but I do not endorse their lifestyle or agenda. Homosexuality is a disorder and God’s word, the Bible, the Catholic Church and the natural law all clearly point out the sinful nature of active sexual relations among people of the same gender. I do have sympathy for people who suffer from SSAD but like all people who have addictions and “trials” they are called to identify and offer up their sufferings to God. Frowning upon the gay agenda is not equated with bigotry and homophobia - this is emotional blackmail and won’t be tolerated by the faithful who are only concerned with the truth.

I read that article also. It made me tired. I’m so disgusted with the acceptance of deviant behavior by the media, and the entire secular world. I’m getting tired of argueing why it’s wrong.
I feel badly for the teens who read this stuff and see that “Dear Abby” accepts it so it must be okay. When I was a teen, I read the column regularly to obtain an adult view of the world aside from my parents. Abby has sure taken a powder since then!

ElizabethAnne I had a very similar awakening about homosexuality. Since I was raised by very secular parents I never had a concept of homosexuality as a sin. They simply didn’t recognize that concept. However as biologists they maintained that homosexuality was not normal because all species are basically hardwired to survive and to procreate. Any behavior detrimental to survival and procreation (as is homosexuality) is therefore abnormal. However the attitude was not the wagging finger in the face, this is an abomination.

I know a LOT of homosexuals, several I know very very well. I am involved in an activity that homosexuals tend to gravitate to and so for many years I encountered homosexuals and like you thought they were very nice guys, found their mannerisms rather amusing and sort of ignored the ramifications of their behavior. It was about then that AIDS was being seen in the homosexual community and in fact I did lose several friends to AIDS and have one friend who is living (barely) with this disease. Suddenly the club scene, the bathouses, the anonymous and promiscuous sexual activity didn’t seem all that harmless.

As I learned more and more about Catholic teachings I realized that while sometimes it seems they are hopelessly behind the times in reality they have proven right time and time again. While I still love my homosexual friends I now pray they will leave this lifestyle. I think the activism of current homosexuals is very damaging to society and normalizes what is absolutely abnormal behavior. There is nothing life affirming about homosexual acts. They certainly may provide transitory pleasure but there are many damaging behaviors that do the same thing including adulterous sex, drugs, drinking, and driving fast. Transitory pleasure should not be the reason we engage in certain behaviors.

Anyway I am sorry you were so upset by the encounter with Catholic teachings. I also resisted but realize that I was simply making excuses because I happened to have several dear friends who have been sucked into homosexualiy. It’s very sad. I am also sorry “Dear Abby” or whoever is writing the column, has been taken in by the homosexual lobby. She used to have good sense.

Lisa N

[quote=gnosys]Is “Dear Abby” still alive? Somehow I thought she died a couple of years ago – in which case this would be a repeat or someone else continuing her column. Or am I just crazy?

I have to say, I feel like homosexuals get a lot harsher treatment from many Christians than other sinners – especially since most homosexuals have no control over their sexual orientation (and usually spend a long time denying their orientation and/or wishing desperately that they were not gay). Sure, they can remain celibate, but that’s asking a lot, when the possibility of love is right there in front of them. Homosexuals I have known have not tried to force their agenda (or their attentions) on me or anyone else; they just ask for the same rights other Americans have.

If you ask me, heterosexual adulterers represent a far greater threat to family life, yet nowhere near the same level of vicious condemnation is directed against them. I’m curious – how many people who are posting against homosexuality here can say they know one or more gay people fairly well? I only ask, because it seems to me that generally understanding tends to develop alongside familiarity (which does not mean your basic values change; a sin is a sin, but one can have more or less empathy toward the sinner.)
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I don’t think homosexuals get more harsh treatment than other sinners. It’s just that most other sinners don’t hold “Murderers Pride” or “Adulterers Pride” parades and rallies, etc. Being a sinner is something we all have to deal with, but showing such incredible pride in a sinful nature is abhorrent. Also, trying to force your lifestyle down other people’s throats is one sure way to annoy the heck out of them. I don’t want to be forced to extend same sex rights to employees (thereby violating my religious beliefs) or be struck with a lawsuit.
As far as being able to control their orientation…the jury’s still out. We cannot say with a preponderance of scientific evidence whether or not homosexuality is a genetic issue or a choice issue.
I agree with you about the threat to families brought on by heterosexual adulterers, but then again…unless someone “comes out” in public and shouts his sin through a bullhorn, there’s little chance I’ll ever know about it.
I know many homosexuals, and as children of God (and some as very good friends), I can and do feel great love for them. However, I would never march in a parade with them, or attend any type of “marriage” ceremony, or condone their behaviour.

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