RCIA

So, as I have talked about in earlier threads, I have had some issues about my stance in the church. I was raised in SSPX and received all my early sacraments there, and recently found out that they were perhaps not valid.

I finally e-mailed a priest about this. He told me that I need to sign up for RCIA and jump in there. Since I was baptized and raised somewhat within the faith, he said that it’s possible I could participate in communion on the Easter vigil if I act soon.

I’m so nervous. Not to be in RCIA, but because…what do I tell my parents? My dad is former SSPV, now atheist, and my mom is atheist and pretty much openly against the church. My mother has even decided that I only like the Catholic church because I’m so into history. I don’t think either of them would be pleased for this.

I don’t know what sort of time commitment goes into RCIA, but my guess is that I will have to tell my parents sometime or another, especially if it involves after school time. My mom is one thing, but my dad…I just keep thinking of my first communion 8 years ago and telling him that I’m doing it all over again in the ‘real’ Catholic church. He’s atheist, but I don’t think he really left the SSPV church that long ago after, you know, 30 or so years of being told how the modern Church is heretical and such.

I’m going to do it. Of course. But I don’t know what to say. Have any of you ever been in a similar situation?

At churches I have attended RCIA occurs at Mass time. The candidate attends Mass until after the homily. At that point they go with their sponsor for their class. (They don’t stay for communion as a symbol of not yet being in communion with the congregation.) Your parish may be different, so you’ll have to speak to the person running the program for all of the details. Besides this, there have been a couple of Saturday activities.

I have not had to seal with a situation like you are facing, but I have had to tell my parents really serious things. In my experience, honesty has been the best policy.

After Prom in high school, my date and I and a bunch of friends went to the beach. While we were there one guy in the group pulled out some liquor. The police saw it, came over, took our names and numbers, and gave a ticket to the guy who had the bottle. (Scare tactics, maybe. It worked! :rolleyes:) They threatened to search the cars, but luckily they did not. Another guy had cocaine, unbeknownst to us! My date, the couple we doubled with and I had no idea that wither the liquor or drugs were there. (We did not know the guy with the drugs. He was from another school and was invited by his date.)

The problem grew when the guy with the ticket said he wasn’t going to court! This would result in all of our parents being notified. If it got out at our Catholic high school, we would not be allowed to walk at graduation. (My date was with the senior class president. All the kids there were top students, etc. This would have been a HUGE scandal. Mind you, this was back in 1976.)

I knew I had to tell my parents. If they got a call from the state police I would die a slow and painful death! :eek: But, HOW?

First, I decided to “divide and conquer”. I told my mom everything. (I figured it was good practice for telling my dad who had a fierce temper.) Since I brought the issue to her, she didn’t get too upset. Especially since I had no part in obtaining or drinking the liquor. But, she was concerned about graduation, etc. She stayed calm, though, and listened. She even offered to tell my dad.

My dad came to me later and we talked. It all went fine! I was SOOOO relieved. He told me that they didn’t get mad because:

  1. I told them the story without being asked.
  2. I told them right away.
  3. I told the truth.
  4. I handled it like an adult.

Being a Catholic is HARD! Telling your folks is the first lesson. Sneaking around is definitely not allowed! (There’s that pesky little “honor your parents” thing, not to mention the 8th commandment!) Talk to your mom first if she is easier to talk to. Just tell her what’s in your heart. She loves you and wants what is best for you. Let her know that you love her and your decision is not about her. You have to live the best life you can and you believe this is the path for you. You hope that she will support you, even if she doesn’t agree with you. After all, she changed her life!

Maybe she will handle your dad, but if not, ask her to be present if it will help. Do NOT lose your temper! Do NOT speak disrespectfully, no natter what they say! Keep your voice humble and low. Tell them what this means to you. Let them know that this is your decision and you feel like you must follow it through. Ask them to try to understand you and o respect your beliefs even if they can’t agree with them.

Please let us know how it turns out. I’ll be praying for you!


Jesus, Prince of all Heavenly truths, Your Words are carved for eternity! You have commanded the virtue of honesty, It is the power against all deceptions. Direct Your Spirit of honesty upon me, That by soul may always remain stainless. Guide my daily thoughts, words and actions, To join those living by the Spirit of truth. For honesty yields harmony and loyalty, Enriching all human relationships. By the power of Your Spirit that flourishes, Honesty will prevail in this world!

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