Reflection On A Confession Experience

For the first time in my life, I think I did not say, “for these sins and others, I am sorry”, which I was and the priest was listened and I felt heard felt a load off my shoulders and he really talked to me. He gave me my penance but then I said “thank you Father” and left and realized “oh my gosh…I never said, ‘I am sorry’”. Does this mean it wasn’t a valid confession? Am a bit confused…I don’t understand how I could have forgotten. Been really stressed lately and am living in a negative environment where basically I am not validated…I am not heard and am blamed for everything that goes wrong. In any case, I went to confession but this is not the church I want to go to, because of the fact that the person that I live with (actually, it is my Mother) goes to this church and I do not want to encounter her there (it’s a very complicated ‘relationship’, if you can call it that). Hopefully, I will be able to move out soon and nearby a different church. So I am not sure if this in any way ties in or somehow (not that I am intentionally trying to explain the unusual confession experience). Think I am done. Would appreciate any feedback and perhaps clarification or advice. Thank you in advance and God Bless.

(P.S. I think I posted this in the wrong section previously but I am a bit lost as to how this works, so I apologize if this is found somewhere else).

the only things valid for absolution are:

  • that you ARE sorry (in your intention!) and resolve to not sin again
  • the priest says the absolution
  • you don’t lie to the priest and you say everything you can remember.

It’s also important to examine your conscience well so you repent of everything that is a sin.

However… not saying “for these sins and others, I am sorry” does not invalidate Confession. If you are sorry, then Jesus is aware of this. Remember that you’re confessing to Jesus, the priest is acting “In the person of Christ” and He is there. The priest gives absolution and Jesus forgives.

Actually, I don’t think I’ve ever said “for these sins and others, I am sorry”, - firstly because I was never told to do this (I’m a convert) and secondly, I keep on forgetting. :shrug: Maybe this could be a reminder to say it the next time :wink:

but as long as you told all your mortal sins and got the absolution, you are forgiven.

God bless

Dear AM,

Please don’t worry about this. Confession is not a one way conversation with God. The priest is there as God’s representative and it is a two way conversation. As such, he’s there to help you through it, especially in times of stress. He will advise if you need to say anything further or elaborate at all. You should trust when he gives the absolution that he is satisfied with your confession and as God’s representative is forgiving you of your sins, all those specifically confessed and any others (provided you have not intentionally failed to confess them).

AM, did you say a Contrition?

*O my God,
I am heartily sorry for
having offended Thee,

and I detest all my sins,
because I dread the loss of heaven,
and the pains of hell;
but most of all because
they offend Thee, my God,
Who are all good and
deserving of all my love.
I firmly resolve,
with the help of Thy grace,
to confess my sins,
to do penance,
and to amend my life.


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