Responding to the all to common charge of being "homo-phobic"?

I could use some help here. I know that the Catholic Church teaches us to love and respect all. I also know it teaches that homosexual acts and gay marriage are sinful. My problem is explaining this to colleagues who continually throw the “you’re homo-phobic” charge back in my face.

How do we explain the Churches teaching and stance on this aspect of moral theology and properly respond to the “homo-phobic” charge that seems to be all so common these days. Typically I try to explain that it is not the person but the act that the Church is against but I often find I am at a loss of words to properly explain this. Can someone please give me a few suggestions as to responding to such people regarding the Churches stance on gay marriage and homsexuality and that we are not homo-phobic".

You could try pointing out that once upon a time there was a more specific use of the term “homophobia.” Now I don’t recall if it ever was a technical psychiatric diagnosis, but there was a time when it meant having an obsessional fear that one was gay or would suddenly become gay. Sort of a form of OCD - like “How do I know for sure I’m not gay?”

It usually manifested itself to young people who were “finding themselves” and unsure of their identities (not just sexual, personality as a whole). And it could be set off by having several people (friends or media figures) “come out” as gay within a short period of time. Then the young person would wonder “might I be next?” and if they had a worrying type of mind it could become an obsession and a source of great anxiety.

Now it has been taking by the pro-gay movement and expanded as an umbrella political term to use against anyone who objects to the gay movement’s agenda, has a belief that homosexual activity (as opposed to being SSA but chaste) is wrong, opposes redefinition of marriage, etc.

Homophobia is not a recognized mental health issue.

No one has an irrational fear of homosexual persons. It’s an emotional attack term - that’s all.

The issue the Church is trying to inform people about is gay marriage and the negative effects it will have. But, here are a few tips.

  1. You will meet those who use this attack word over and over no matter what you say. Say what you can and avoid arguing.

  2. There will be those who will listen and then tell you the Church is wrong.

  3. Some will listen and then accuse you and/or the Church of being filled with hate.

  4. A few may consider what you have to say. If only one reconsiders then that is a good thing.

First, gay marriage does not work biologically. The male and female have sex organs designed for each other, the man-man, female-female combination do not.

And this is not a civil rights issue or just a Christian thing:

Here is what the Church tells us:

Finally, don’t allow yourself to become frustrated. Consider this: Why do two homosexual persons need your or my or the Catholic Church’s approval to live how they want?

So, no matter how many times you hear it, it’s just a reason to rile you up. Nothing more. After you say what you should say, let it drop. You’ve done your part.

Hope this helps,

To put this plainly…

I tell them from the perspective of the Catholic church that we consider it a sin. That I am also a sinner, therefore I am not judging you. The Catholic Church holds the family unit in high regard because God told us to be fruitful and multiply. Homosexual unions cannot procreate thus they are going against what Jesus instructed us to do. This sin like all sin is forgivable through the Passion of our Lord Jesus Christ. I leave it at that. I keep it simple.

I do not go into all the “technical” church teachings because they will stop listening.

Hope this helps.

I wish I were knowledgable enough to explain things in simple words like you. This goes for any subject. :blush: I’m not so much homophobic as I am PHOBOPHOBIC:shrug:

When some one accuses me of being Homo-phobic, I say, “Oh I thought we could have an intelligent discussion, where ideas could be expressed in a respectful manner. I’m sorry you feel the need to resort to name calling.” People usually resort to name calling when they are loosing an argument! They are trying to hurt you on purpose to shut you up!

Here’s another response, “So I’m supposed to listen to your position with respect, but you won’t give any to me?” or turn it back on them, and the truth about their behavior “Why do you have to be such a hater?” They will start back peddling, then you can point out how intolerant they are of any view but militant gay rights. Another response, which works with Christians is, “So I’m supposed to listen to them, above listening to God?” Then I teach how God always calls us to what is best for us, not what is easy, like following our sinful inclinations. I teach that it is false compassion to support the gay life style, because it encourages them to continue in a way of life that harms them, and others. If you love some one you want what is best for them!

It would seem some Shrinks are still divided on the issue over Homophobia being a mental issue and treating patients for it with psychotropic drugs. Not surprising if it makes them money. It also keeps big pharmaceutical companies happy. :rolleyes:

Money talks and "BS"walks so the saying goes. :rolleyes:

I am willing to counter them by calling them aletophobic. After all, they have an irrational fear of the truth regarding marriage.

Hurling out derogatory labels is just an attempt to short circuit discussion. If they are truly tolerant of all beliefs, that necessitates them being tolerant of the viewpoint that homosexual acts are intrinsically disordered.

You might ask if they think being an alcoholic is an acceptable lifestyle choice. If they say no, then ask them if it would be accurate to call them alcohol-phobic.

When you say “colleagues,” I assume that you are referring to the workplace. You need to be very careful discussing homosexuality in work situations due to the current political climate. Of course, people in the workplace who ridicule you for being Christian may be committing illegal discrimination themselves. However, the current climate is open season on Christians.

Just tell them we’re an equal opportunity offender:

Our church will be deemed to be offending any group that

restricts religious liberty
demeans human dignity
undermines marriage and the family
devalues human sexuality
oppresses the poor and weak
is for abortion or euthenasia

etc., etc.

If we ain’t offending we ain’t witnessing:thumbsup:

That may be true but it’s not entirely complete:

Homophobia also exhibits itself in violent acts and words committed against persons of homosexual orientation.

A person who, say, refuses to sell food in his shop to a customer because that person is homosexual is guilty of homophobia.

The Church teaches us that we are to avoid undue and unjust discrimination against people with homosexual tendencies. To that extent it recognises that ‘homophobia’ exists and is wrong.

To the OP, if you are trying to fend off claims of institutional ‘homophobia’ as regards the Church, you would do best to illustrate that the Church teaches explicitly that the simple presence of a homosexual desire or orientation in a person is morally neutral and that it’s only the sexual function where used outside marriage that is to be avoided - and that it’s condemned avoided for heterosexuals just as much. The Church treats gay and straight people completely equally in that regard since the sexual act is meant for the purpose of procreation (which is an observable objective truth whether or not you’re a religious person).

Homophobic is a contrived term used to silence those that oppose homosexual acts. It is a terrible charge and one that misleads. It would be like wrongly calling someone a bigot or a hater. It is mostly used as a weapon.

You may want to start by asking them why they are so closed-minded? Why must they call you names if their position is sound?

Pretty much a nonsense term used as a weapon. BTW, what if people claimed they were born “homophobic”? What if they said you must accept them on their terms or you were a bigot?

A homophobephobic?

The Church never uses the term homophobia. There is no such thing. If someone refuses to sell something to a homosexual person, that is only the choice of the shop owner - nobody else. To label a group, like Catholics, as homophobic is irrational.

Discrimination exists, but it would be wrong to call it “an irrational fear.” People bully other people because of their skin color, their weight and even political views.

I understand “violent acts.” What are “violent words”?


Ask them if being in favor of same sex marriage means they are gay?

Also, I suggest not trying to explain it, but finding a tract online that does and sending them a link to it. People don’t really want the information, usually, they just want to argue. So don’t. Witness through the way you live, instead.

Not bad. I like it.

The Magisterium doesn’t use the term same sex attraction.

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