Thinking of looking for a room mate. I have a 3 bedroom house and it’s just me and 2 cats. I don’t have much furniture as I just moved in from a 1 bedroom apartment in fact I’m sleeping in my living room on a fouton as I don’t even have a couch yet. I’m working on doing repairs on the house so I’ve put off investing in a lot of furniture till I get those done. I also don’t like a lot of clutter so I’ve refrained from buying a lot of stuff. How do you go about safely finding a compatible roommate in this day and age. I don’t trust craigslist or any online sites.

Is there a local newspaper you could put an advertisement in? Or maybe ask around at church to find if anybody knows anybody who is looking to rent a room,

Draw up a list of rules of what is and isnt allowed, its your home, your rules, if people dont like it then they may not be a good fit as a room mate,

Also before you commit to letting someone be a room mate have a trial period so you can see if this someone who you can happily live with,

There is no 100% safe way to find a roommate. Even if it is someone you know well, that dosn’t mean you will enjoy living with them. You can minimize your risk by having a written contract and making it a month-to-month arrangement. Good luck!

I would definitely consider asking around your Church and letting people know there you are looking for a roommate.

There are a lot of scammers on craigslist to be sure, but it’s also how a lot of normal, honest people search for rooms to rent (myself included). It’s basically just online classifieds. You can avoid a lot of problems by having phone conversations with potential roommates and running a background check on anyone you’re seriously considering.

Other than that? Word of mouth or posting something at church or in your church bulletin. It’ll be a much smaller audience, though.

Good luck.

Congratulations on your new home. Ask Father to bless your new home. You can invite friends or families to your home blessing.

You might consider an Enthronement to the Sacred Heart of Jesus. :heart:

Have you thought about adjusting to your new home before adjusting to a new home and a room mate?

Someone might find your place “ideal for them”. Plenty of room for all their stuff… their bedroom stuff, their living room stuff, their clutter.

Adjust first to your home. Then make very specific rules for a room mate. Should they help with your repairs? Should they limit their stuff to their room? What about chores and lawn care, how should they help? What about utilities? Everyone has different ideas of home and how they should live.

As with all things, pray about your home and a room mate?

I think you are getting a little bit ahead of yourself. Roommates are another level of hell. You might be a little lonely. Get a hobby or an outside interest. I never advise roommates. It only takes one bad roommate to change your mind but a bad roommate can cause a lot of long-term problems.

Agreed. Put up some ads and try to spend time with people to get a feel for how they might be. Maybe try to find someone with common interests if you want to actually be friends with the person. If not, just find a busy student who will likely spend most of their time studying.

A hobby or outside interest is not a substitute for human interaction, and roommates are not always another level of hell. I had some really nice roommates when I first moved to a major city, and that was a really good time in my life. The key to making a roommate situation work out is to make sure that you’re able to respect one another’s space and need for alone time.

You are the exception.

Clean freaks
Dirty slobs
Sex in their room; strangers spending the night
Bathroom sharing
Groceries being eaten by the roommate

And weirder stuff than those.

I mean, where are you looking? There are a lot of young professionals these days who still have roommates in their late 20s/early 30s where drugs/stealing/uncleanliness shouldn’t be an issue. Sure, a roommate situation can be bad, but I think it’s a little odd to assume that the general rule is that roommates will be nightmarish. It just strikes me as a little strange.

Sadly, I have to agree with TheRealJulian. It is very hard to find good roommate after graduating. As a student everyone was in the same boat ie no money therefor live cheaply. But once people graduate, the ones who can afford it get their own place because they have had it with putting up with others. Or, IMO the reason so many people live together. They can’t afford their own place and don’t want a roommate.

It is not that people are bad. It is just that everyone has their own habits and ideas. Little things can become big fights. EG, I had a roommate who when she was too busy would just leave all the dishes in the sink because in her opinion it would make the place look neater. I would leave all the dishes on the counter because I hate using a sink full of dishes. Believe it or not, that became an issue. I actually started doing her dishes because in my mind, there was a sink full of soap I did not want to waste and it was only another 5 minutes and I genuinely did not care. I actually like doing dishes. She got mad at me for making her feel guilty

So, little things can turn into big fights. And lastly, anyone who thinks they can get a roommate that will not want to bring overnight guest IMO is very naïve. Since the OP is the owner of the house she may have more say in the matter, but still I would be cautious


I’m only considering getting a roommate as I have a 3 bedroom house and it’s only me. Not because of being alone. I’m thinking more of security. I had a break in last thursday and I’m thinking two people livinging in a house is less of a target than one person. I’m not home much either with 2 jobs. But the added income would be beneficial. Also several people have suggested it. I’m just thinking about it at this point. I tend to think over things awhile. It took me 6 years to actually buy the house for example so I never do anything fast.

Maybe a security system would be good for your safety.

Me too. But I probably wouldn’t let anyone live in my house who I didn’t know or hadn’t met a few times. I know it can be tricky to find a good one though.

I looked into that it’s beyond my budget right now.

I have had my share of neurotic roommates too. I rented a room from a separatist lesbian at one point. She was also narcoleptic. Now, I realize that most people aren’t that whacked, but still. A lot of things can get screwy with a roommate, and you are leaving yourself open to all sorts of stuff. I would rather live in a smaller place and live alone than take a chance with a stranger.

I may check with my local parish and see if anyone is looking. I will think on it some more.

If you want to feel safer I suggest a large dog. My rottie keeps me safe, and anyone who breaks in will get what they deserve.

You may have a moral problem with my next suggestion and if that’s the case feel free to ignore it. Have you considered a male roommate? I lived in a 2 bed 2 bath apartment with my best friend through several years of college. We had a lot of privacy from each other and lived together well. But when someone came to the door at night he would answer it. If I got home from school or work really late I would call him and have him meet me in the parking lot to walk me inside, especially if I had to park far away from my apartment. For one of the years we lived together our neighbors were another set of platonic, opposite sex roommates, and they had a similar system.

On security systems:

Check with your home owners insurance. They may give a discount for having a security system which may help towards the cost of the system and monitoring.

Check for specials with security monitoring companies. Sometimes they have “free systems” with a 1 -2 year monitoring contract.

Check for simple system you can have installed by anyone and just not have a monitoring company. The alarm will sound if someone enters your home, but it is not called in to any monitoring site. The thief does not know it is not monitored and hopefully leaves as the alarm sounds.

Stop by one of the monitoring companies office to ask about their specials. Ask them for free window decals and yard sign, even if you tell them you can’t afford their service today. They may be happy to have their sign in your yard as advertisement of their company. The thief does not know you are not actually using their monitoring system.

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