Saddened by relatives' refusal to attend my son's Confirmation


My husband & I converted to Catholicism shortly after our marriage. My husband's family members all profess to be devout Christians but don't think Catholics are Christians & so they won't attend any of our children's baptisms, first communions, confirmations or even school performances (our children attend Catholic school & my husband teaches in one). My family are all atheists & won't attend anything with a religious component. We have a few close Catholic friends, but most of our long-term friends are Protestants who don't understand or approve of our decision to return home or are not religious. So this leaves us with virtually no support during these important sacraments & times of celebration. I am always hurt, saddened & angered by this rejection, particularly because my husband's family members treat us as if we're apostates who have joined a strange cult. My middle son's Confirmation is Jan 23rd and I invited all the family on both sides and long-time friends; everyone refused and didn't even offer excuses. Yet, we attend all their children's dedications, teen/adult baptisms & even their church's Christmas productions. I would really appreciate prayers for peace so that I don't say or do anything that could cause tension or disharmony now or later & that I am able to enjoy my son's Confirmation without being envious of the large extended families celebrating around us.


well you are welcome to our parish, there won’t be large extended families in the pews because just the candidates and sponsors take up 2/3 of our small church.

Yes I understand your pain, it is the same with us, simply no close family that see any of this as important, glad my daughters married into families where the situation is opposite, but even so, for the actual first communions and confirmations, we actually had to have tickets in their parishes. Don’t fly up there any more because of cost but also because “other grandparents” have dibs on the tickets for the rite in church.


Our Father, which art in Heaven
Hollowed be thy name
Thy kingdom come, thy will be done
On earth as it is in Heaven

Give us this day, our daily bread
And forgive us our trespasses
As we forgive those who trespass against us

Lead us not into temptation
But deliver us from evil



Faithx6, you are taking the high road and God bless you for it. However, I wonder if you should cut back on your attendance of the less important of their events. To attend theirs while they shun yours implies some sort of acceptance on your part of this situation.

In any case, my prayers are with you. Be strong.

Do you have friends in your parish who you could invite to the Confirmation party? Their presence would give you a feeling of support.


I am so sad for this loss in your life…the support of family. I am sure this hurts deeply. The rejection of family is hard but remember that our Lord also know what rejection is and understands. He knows your pain like no other. Focus on what God has blessed you with and remember that He will use you to be a shining light of love to those in your family…what a more wonderful gift that is. Obviously all I say is most definately easier to say than do. That is where prayer comes in. I will pray:crossrc:
Blessings in Him,


Lord Jesus, lead us towards unity, we pray, let Your Body, which is the Church be One.

Place your tears in the Sacred Heart of Jesus so that your desires for unity in your family maybe one with our Lord Jesus' desire for Unity.


You are not alone, my friend, my family are all fallen away Catholics, and think I am crazy to practice and live my faith and to raise my child to do the same. I will pray for you.

Remember, O most gracious Virgin Mary, that never was it known that anyone who fled to thy protection, implored thy help, or sought thine intercession was left unaided.
Inspired by this confidence, I fly unto thee, O Virgin of virgins, my mother; to thee do I come, before thee I stand, sinful and sorrowful. O Mother of the Word Incarnate, despise not my petitions, but in thy mercy hear and answer me.


Peace be with you.


The important thing is, that you are there for your son and your children. They may not even have an understanding at all of what confirmation is. Praying that the Holy Spirit fills your son with an abundance of His precious gifts ...

Hail Mary,
full of grace,
the Lord is with thee.
Blessed art thou among women,
and blessed is the fruit of thy womb,
Holy Mary,
Mother of God,
pray for us sinners now,
and at the hour of our death.




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