SBC Family and my conversion


#1

Greetings friends,

I don't know exactly how to articulate what I'm feeling at this moment other than I am extremely discouraged and extremely nervous/afraid of the future.

I have grown up in a Southern Baptist home and raised by two very loving parents who continue to serve and work in a SBC Church. My mom plays piano and my Dad is a deacon in the SBC.

I also have a younger brother who is a "small group" leader, regular sunday school attender, and plays in the orchestra at the SBC Church where I am also on the membership role.

I have continued to be minimally involved at my brother's SBC Church and I play in the orchestra there as well. I do this mostly to please my parents. I cannot bear being involved in a "small group" or going to "sunday school", because essentially in beliefs about theology and scripture I am a Catholic and I feel very drawn to an especially traditional practice of the Catholic faith (attending the Extraordinary Form Mass, traditional devotions, reading writings from more ancient popes and saints).

I finally reached a point about two years ago where I had to abandon going to sunday school class or attending "small group" because it brought me too much emotional pain to deal with beacuse I had to suppress my true beliefs in the group or be severely reprimanded and argued with about them.

During the time that I have been minimally involved in my SBC Church by playing in the orchestra there, I have tried to make it to Mass as often as possible, sometimes on Saturday nights and sometimes on Sunday afternoons when family has been out of town. I have kept this mostly a secret from my family. I live on my own about 20 minutes from them. My girlfriend is a cradle Catholic and she has helped encourage me some, however she only goes to mass a few times a year or when she is with me. I would not call her practicing from what I've observed. We are long distance as well, so this makes things rather different for us too.

I am at a breaking point I feel regarding my faith and I don't know what I should do or how I should handle things. I have tried to speak to my father before about Catholicism and was met with extreme hostility and a very argumentative and angry attitude. My brother has also expressed similar feelings, and I believe my mother will be more of a hurt and disappointed demeanor.

I feel that I may be at a cross roads where I have to choose my faith in my God or my relationship with my parents and brother. I feel that if I don't get recieved into the Church that my faith is going to become so frustrated that it may die. I can't imagine that my family will ever understand or fully accept me at least not any time soon if I convert to the Catholic Church and leave my SBC church.

I love you Lord Jesus....please give me the strength to follow You.

I appreciate any advice that anyone can give and your prayers. Thank you all for your encouragement and knowledge that you have shared over the years I have spent on this forum. I am so afraid and feel so discouraged.....

~Josh


#2

Pick up "Born Fundamentalist, Born Again Catholic" by David Currie, I believe it will help give you strength to discuss the truth you have been finding with your family.

I spent years studying as most of my family, and my wife's are Baptist (her Grandfather was a minister) so that I could make sure I could defend the beliefs God was leading me too. To be honest though, in almost 5 years it has really only come up a couple of times with her family and my answers always made them think and my mother is close to actually converting (Baptist her whole life).

Study but never for get to pray and ask God to give you both the words and wisdom and give your family the ears to hear.

My wife never told her GF as he was sick that we were becoming Catholic because she didn't know how he would react. I told her I felt that after talking with some other Ministers he would understand as I could explain things but she didn't want to cause issues or worry while he was sick. He knew we were a faithful family and we just left it at that.

A few months after he passed away we were at his house with her aunt who had not been overly religious most of her life (happens often with PKs). When we were talking about religion we told her that we had become Catholic but didn't know how Pa would have taken it and didn't want him to worry. She left the room and came back with a Rosary. Shortly after our conversion a few year before she has been out somewhere on the anniversary of her mothers death the previous year. She had been asking God to give her a sign that her mother was in Heaven. As she reached for a blouse to purchase someone had left a Rosary hanging on it. She got the blouse and also took the rosary home. Knowing nothing about Catholicism she didn't know how to pray it or anything about it. All she knew was that she had prayed for a sign and there it was. After a few weeks she spoke with Pa about and they apparently discussed his feelings on other Christian Faiths and the rosary she found and how she came about to have it. He told her it he believed it was a sign and that his wife must now know more than he if she was in Heaven and how we should embrace the revelations God sends us.

Needless to say for us, especially for my wife, it was a very moving moment as she could have discussed her faith with her grandfather. There is no doubt in my mind, or hers, that her Grandfather is in Heaven and now he knows the Truth of the Church and is praying for us. My point in that story is to trust God to open the doors when you discuss things with your family. Could some of the completely reject you because of your faith? Sure, many have done that throughout the years, but that is not always the case. Who knows, you might end up changing their lives...

Joe


#3

I am a cradle Catholic and so I don't have any idea about the hardships you are facing, but I am praying for you.


#4

Josh,

You need to follow Christ and no one else. It's not always easy and Jesus did warn us that doing so would cause family strife:
[BIBLEDRB]Matthew 10:34-36[/BIBLEDRB]

I'll pray for you.


#5

Move out. Don't compromise. It will kill you on the inside.

I was essentially a closet Mormon for two years. The internal pain, repression, and self-loathing almost made me an atheist and made me 100% miserable.

Then a very dear young woman I know showed me what real Christian love was, and I went with her to Mass. I was immediately converted.

And I wasn't afraid to oppose my parents with regards to the Catholic Faith.

Moving out for the few months leading up to my confirmation and the month after sure as hell reduced tension in our relationship, though.


#6

[quote="FromTheAshes777, post:1, topic:247429"]
Greetings friends,

I don't know exactly how to articulate what I'm feeling at this moment other than I am extremely discouraged and extremely nervous/afraid of the future.

I have grown up in a Southern Baptist home and raised by two very loving parents who continue to serve and work in a SBC Church. My mom plays piano and my Dad is a deacon in the SBC.

I also have a younger brother who is a "small group" leader, regular sunday school attender, and plays in the orchestra at the SBC Church where I am also on the membership role.

I have continued to be minimally involved at my brother's SBC Church and I play in the orchestra there as well. I do this mostly to please my parents. I cannot bear being involved in a "small group" or going to "sunday school", because essentially in beliefs about theology and scripture I am a Catholic and I feel very drawn to an especially traditional practice of the Catholic faith (attending the Extraordinary Form Mass, traditional devotions, reading writings from more ancient popes and saints).

I finally reached a point about two years ago where I had to abandon going to sunday school class or attending "small group" because it brought me too much emotional pain to deal with beacuse I had to suppress my true beliefs in the group or be severely reprimanded and argued with about them.

During the time that I have been minimally involved in my SBC Church by playing in the orchestra there, I have tried to make it to Mass as often as possible, sometimes on Saturday nights and sometimes on Sunday afternoons when family has been out of town. I have kept this mostly a secret from my family. I live on my own about 20 minutes from them. My girlfriend is a cradle Catholic and she has helped encourage me some, however she only goes to mass a few times a year or when she is with me. I would not call her practicing from what I've observed. We are long distance as well, so this makes things rather different for us too.

I am at a breaking point I feel regarding my faith and I don't know what I should do or how I should handle things. I have tried to speak to my father before about Catholicism and was met with extreme hostility and a very argumentative and angry attitude. My brother has also expressed similar feelings, and I believe my mother will be more of a hurt and disappointed demeanor.

I feel that I may be at a cross roads where I have to choose my faith in my God or my relationship with my parents and brother. I feel that if I don't get recieved into the Church that my faith is going to become so frustrated that it may die. I can't imagine that my family will ever understand or fully accept me at least not any time soon if I convert to the Catholic Church and leave my SBC church.

I love you Lord Jesus....please give me the strength to follow You.

I appreciate any advice that anyone can give and your prayers. Thank you all for your encouragement and knowledge that you have shared over the years I have spent on this forum. I am so afraid and feel so discouraged.....

~Josh

[/quote]

Josh --

We have a convert forum filled with converts (I am myself a convert) and you would be welcome to join us for spiritual help and consolation. The URL is

forums.catholic-convert.com/index.php

You will find a lot of people who have gone through very similar agonies. Conversion is not easy, especially when you have family issues.

We will be praying for you.

Brother Ed


#7

[quote="FromTheAshes777, post:1, topic:247429"]
Greetings friends,

I don't know exactly how to articulate what I'm feeling at this moment other than I am extremely discouraged and extremely nervous/afraid of the future.

I have grown up in a Southern Baptist home and raised by two very loving parents who continue to serve and work in a SBC Church. My mom plays piano and my Dad is a deacon in the SBC.

I also have a younger brother who is a "small group" leader, regular sunday school attender, and plays in the orchestra at the SBC Church where I am also on the membership role.

I have continued to be minimally involved at my brother's SBC Church and I play in the orchestra there as well. I do this mostly to please my parents. I cannot bear being involved in a "small group" or going to "sunday school", because essentially in beliefs about theology and scripture I am a Catholic and I feel very drawn to an especially traditional practice of the Catholic faith (attending the Extraordinary Form Mass, traditional devotions, reading writings from more ancient popes and saints).

I finally reached a point about two years ago where I had to abandon going to sunday school class or attending "small group" because it brought me too much emotional pain to deal with beacuse I had to suppress my true beliefs in the group or be severely reprimanded and argued with about them.

During the time that I have been minimally involved in my SBC Church by playing in the orchestra there, I have tried to make it to Mass as often as possible, sometimes on Saturday nights and sometimes on Sunday afternoons when family has been out of town. I have kept this mostly a secret from my family. I live on my own about 20 minutes from them. My girlfriend is a cradle Catholic and she has helped encourage me some, however she only goes to mass a few times a year or when she is with me. I would not call her practicing from what I've observed. We are long distance as well, so this makes things rather different for us too.

I am at a breaking point I feel regarding my faith and I don't know what I should do or how I should handle things. I have tried to speak to my father before about Catholicism and was met with extreme hostility and a very argumentative and angry attitude. My brother has also expressed similar feelings, and I believe my mother will be more of a hurt and disappointed demeanor.

I feel that I may be at a cross roads where I have to choose my faith in my God or my relationship with my parents and brother. I feel that if I don't get recieved into the Church that my faith is going to become so frustrated that it may die. I can't imagine that my family will ever understand or fully accept me at least not any time soon if I convert to the Catholic Church and leave my SBC church.

I love you Lord Jesus....please give me the strength to follow You.

I appreciate any advice that anyone can give and your prayers. Thank you all for your encouragement and knowledge that you have shared over the years I have spent on this forum. I am so afraid and feel so discouraged.....

~Josh

[/quote]

Welcome Home! Well, you will be there eventually. Here is something that might be helpful... You are far from alone in this world. Please understand that. Conflict is always a difficult thing to accept. But more respect is gained for standing up for what you believe to be right than to cave to the pressures of those that don't know the whole story.

Reading your post caused me to think that maybe there is a reason for all this... maybe YOU are to help others close to you see the value in Catholicism, too? Or, as a reason to draw you deeper into scripture study? Should you still be at Sunday School asking the tough questions like Jesus did when he was young and in the Temple? What do you think God is saying to you? It could be much more than just your personal conversion.

A book I loved was "Rome, Sweet Home." Now there's a story about the pain, the conflict and the joyfulness of conversion...


#8

I’m with Brother Ed. I came from the Church of Christ (Campbellite) movement, where each little congregation is pretty much on it’s own–there is no larger structure, officially at least. Becoming Catholic caused some static with my older brother and sister, both of whom hold master’s degrees from a seminary that trains pastors and counsellors for that denomination. I’ve been over at the Catholic Convert forum for about twelve years now and have always found it a good place to find support and help. Some of us have really gone through it with family and friends. We can help with working out ways to navigate family issues, having been there and done that. :slight_smile:


#9

You can always choose your practice of faith. What's important is you are doing what is Biblically sound--having a strong relationship with Jesus and walking in obedience, hitting the purpose for which you were created.
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#10

You can always choose your practice of faith. What’s important is you are doing what is Biblically sound–having a strong relationship with Jesus and walking in obedience, hitting the purpose for which you were created.
sewing machines


#11

i understand how you feel FromTheAshes777. its scary how similar our situations are almost everyone in my family is SBC and i have no catholic relatives. It can give you a very lonley feeling. my conversion started when i was in 8th grade (i start my junior year in high school once summer is over) i was dating a tomboyish but sweet catholic girl and i got worried about her salvation because she was catholic. So i started to research. me and her break up after only dating about 3 weeks but the spark had been planted. The more i tried to disprove catholicism the more i started to believe. i asked my dad if i could go to a catholic church once and he went off. at the time it was mostly just out of curiousity but he didnt look at it that way. later i studied a lot but and took good notes but when i brought it up he wouldnt let me go get them and i got drilled. (i just kind of gave a dear in the headlights look. there has been other experiences like this and got to the point where my parents literally told me to stop reading the bible (for a while) :confused:. and sadly after a little while i stopped studying for the most part but this last year there was a change. i got peace i started studying again but now im no longer spiratually torn. Theres no longer the question if i become catholic. That question has turned into WHEN i turn catholic. My friends thankfully are very supportive and have helped me a lot.
i know ive rambled some but i hope i have motivated you. Its hard right now but it will be worth it in the end. These circumstances have made me who i am today. I know things will get better for you God will bless you. I will be praying for you and who knows :D maybe both our familys will convert in the end. Ps thanks for listing to a rambling 16 year old


#12

[quote="Alex27, post:11, topic:247429"]
i understand how you feel FromTheAshes777. its scary how similar our situations are almost everyone in my family is SBC and i have no catholic relatives. It can give you a very lonley feeling. my conversion started when i was in 8th grade (i start my junior year in high school once summer is over) i was dating a tomboyish but sweet catholic girl and i got worried about her salvation because she was catholic. So i started to research. me and her break up after only dating about 3 weeks but the spark had been planted. The more i tried to disprove catholicism the more i started to believe. i asked my dad if i could go to a catholic church once and he went off. at the time it was mostly just out of curiousity but he didnt look at it that way. later i studied a lot but and took good notes but when i brought it up he wouldnt let me go get them and i got drilled. (i just kind of gave a dear in the headlights look. there has been other experiences like this and got to the point where my parents literally told me to stop reading the bible (for a while) :confused:. and sadly after a little while i stopped studying for the most part but this last year there was a change. i got peace i started studying again but now im no longer spiratually torn. Theres no longer the question if i become catholic. That question has turned into WHEN i turn catholic. My friends thankfully are very supportive and have helped me a lot.
i know ive rambled some but i hope i have motivated you. Its hard right now but it will be worth it in the end. These circumstances have made me who i am today. I know things will get better for you God will bless you. I will be praying for you and who knows :D maybe both our familys will convert in the end. Ps thanks for listing to a rambling 16 year old

[/quote]

This is awfully similar in several ways to my situation. Thank you for the encouragement. Are your parents allowing you to enter the Church even though you are under 18?


#13

[quote="newbetx, post:7, topic:247429"]
Welcome Home! Well, you will be there eventually. Here is something that might be helpful... You are far from alone in this world. Please understand that. Conflict is always a difficult thing to accept. But more respect is gained for standing up for what you believe to be right than to cave to the pressures of those that don't know the whole story.

Reading your post caused me to think that maybe there is a reason for all this... maybe YOU are to help others close to you see the value in Catholicism, too? Or, as a reason to draw you deeper into scripture study? Should you still be at Sunday School asking the tough questions like Jesus did when he was young and in the Temple? What do you think God is saying to you? It could be much more than just your personal conversion.

A book I loved was "Rome, Sweet Home." Now there's a story about the pain, the conflict and the joyfulness of conversion...

[/quote]

Thank you friend...I try to be open to what the Lord is leading me to do. I have read Rome Sweet Home and definitely did find it encouraging. Thank you for your prayers and comments.


#14

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