Hi, I have a very serious dilema and was hoping to share it with you. My sister has recently became engaged to a man she has only known for four months. They both have been married in the Catholic Church and have seven children between them. I thought they would wait at least a year and found out just a few days ago that they are not only moving in together (please pray for the children!), but are planning on a Nov. wedding. I wasn’t given the option of not being present. It was assumed that I would be there.
I told her fiancee, in person, that it pains me considerablly to have to make a decision, but I cannot compromise my faith nor the faith witness as a parent and be present at this second marriage. It was one of the hardest decisions that I ever had to make. My husband and I both planned on meeting with her and her fiancee over the next year to speak with them about the matter, but because of the quick wedding date, I was forced to have to speak up earlier since I was going to be in town for a visit. We were at a nephew’s party, and not wanting to ruin his party, I pulled the fiancee over to speak with him. He seemed to understand and thought it was smart of me to speak with him first.
I heard from another sister today, and it wasn’t pleasant. I held my tongue and took the berating. The only thing that I said in my defense was that I must be the only one in the family with an informed conscience. (I am one of nine children). From the discussion, I am the only one not attending. My mother, a widow, doesn’t know yet.
Any advice? Any one been there before?