Should I go to the wedding?


I have just found out that my husband’s cousin is pregnant. She had been engaged for a year prior to this moment. She still intends to be married in a church. At the time she’s to be married - she will be 8 months pregnant.

My question is 2 fold:

  1. Should I go to the wedding? Reception?

  2. Is it ok for me to keep my 7 yr old son home ?

Truth be told - I feel that going to the wedding itself would be condoning what she did – saying it was ok. I also don’t want to subject my son to this – I don’t want his first experience with marriage to set the tone for his life. I don’t want him to think this is the order in which we do things: engaged --> pregnant --> marriage.

I just don’t know if I have ground to stand on saying this. Any advice would be appreciated!


Go to the wedding and get a babysitter for your son.

Sure, go to the wedding! IMO, your attendance at a Sacrament is not condoning their previous behavior, it’s blessing their current action. (They didn’t abort an inconvenient child and they are marrying. Thank you, God! :slight_smile: )

Depending on your son’s maturity level and how much he already knows about where babies come from, you can either get a sitter for him or use it as a teaching moment.

“No, _____ didn’t do these things in the right order. She and ____ made a mistake in having a baby before they got married, but God forgives all the mistakes we make in our lives, if we ask Him to.”

It might be a little too early to get into some of the subject matter that this might bring up, though - you would be the best judge of what your son is ready to hear. :slight_smile:

(Oh yes, thank you God for every little inconvenience created in your image and likeness.)

Luke 15:9 does come to mind
. . . there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one repentant sinner than over the ninety-nine. . . .

When the time comes and in the manner as you see fit, you can start to help your son understand the passage. In fact by the time he becomes an adult, I’m sure you’ll have a lot of experience.

You’re the one who best knows your son.

You could just bring him a nice piece of cake if you think he should stay home this time, or

If you take him along, tell him about the other wonderful wedding at Cana, and those special wedding guests. He could still have cake.

We’re sure you’ll make the best decision. OK, mom, even about whether or not he can have cake.

God bless.

DISCLAIMER: The views and opinions expressed in these forums do not necessarily reflect those of Catholic Answers. For official apologetics resources please visit