I’m a homeschooling mom of 3 kids under 6. I love kids but I am very short on patience and I find myself yelling and arguing with my kids a lot. Sometimes I feel like I’m not a very good mother due to all my numerous imperfections. I know how big responsibility it is to be a mom. I know it is up to me to bring my kids to holiness and how big my role is on the salvation of their souls so all this thoughts make me wonder if I should have any more kids. I am afraid that if I have more kids I will not be a good role model for them. I try my best with my 3 children and I love them with all my heart but I don’t know if I will be able to handle anymore. Any thoughts would help!!!
God bless you!!!
Surrender the decision to God and let Him decide.
Well, first and foremost, ya got to figure out the patience thing…and why you get angry.
Do you have support? do you have someone to watch the kids for just a little bit to allow for some “me” time? Anxiety? Depression?
I had the same…three under six, two in diapers, trying to homeschool, breast feed and be perfect…sometimes we are harder on ourselves than we should be, we beat ourselves up for not being perfect, etc. and in my case, this was and is my anxiety problems that lead to anger…see where I am going with this?
At one of my down moments, I had a tubal because I just couldn’t see me having anymore…this was before I converted, I would give anything to have had more children.
Prayers for you.
That’s a conversation you should have with your husband (with both of you dedicating time to prayer), not a forum of strangers.
There are any nuances of personality and needs that would be impossible for us to assess.
I know one mom who successfully homeschooled up to 7 kids spaced 2-3 years apart (they’re starting to graduate now). That doesn’t mean you should have more.
There are moms who struggle to keep up with 2 or 3 kids. That doesn’t mean you should stop.
As for the conflicts, maybe you can arrange with your husband to take a day retreat once in a while. One mom I know takes a weekend per month to basically have quiet time and compose herself and her plans. My wife occasionally makes a spiritual retreat, which seems to do much for her composure.
My husband does tell me I’m too hard on myself sometimes. I do feel anxiety when I see I can’t accomplish my goals (be perfect :)…)
Thanks for your reply, it was helpful
God bless you
This is a conversation I’ve had with my husband in prayer but at the end he is not the one staying at home with the kids cooking, cleaning and homeschooling all day.
I was just asking for some advice from people who might have been in the same situation as I am right now.
I never thought of having sometime for myself but I think this might be very helpful.
Thanks for your reply and God bless you
Go easy on yourself. You are doing a really good job where you are right now.
However, just because you aren’t perfect doesn’t mean you should feel like denying yourself more children if you want them!
I often wish that I had had several more! Just as I was finally getting the hang of the whole patient mother thing, I decided not to have more! Big mistake! I can truthfully say the more children you have, the more love you have.
Give yourself some time and let God lead you.
I admit that I am not in your position but in your husband’s. If he has a couple of days of child-rearing while you are gone on retreat, there’s a good chance he’ll be more sympathetic. That really helped my understanding, anyway.
Send you school age children to school! It takes a village to raise a child - you’ll find your day to be more peaceful and time away from your school aged kids will most likely give you a renewed sense!