Should I let my child visit a lesbian relative?


This is my first post, so I hope it is in the right place. My wife and I have a 22 month old son. My wife’s aunt and her “partner” live close by and are very nice and caring people. We have visited them at their home a few times, but never stayed the night. We have let them babysit our son at our home a few times, as well. Our intention was to “walk the line” somewhere between “full acceptance” of their lifestyle and rejection of them entirely. Neither seems right.

The difficulty we face now is when the occasional babysitting invitation/offer is made by them. Our position to this point has been unspoken, but I am sure it will become more obvious as our son gets older. We want to have really thought our position through before discussing it with them.

Do you think we are on the right track?


Dear Jim,

By allowing them to baby sit your child already, you have given them a set of expectations. I would just not ask them to baby sit again. Thank them for any invitations they may offer, but don’t take them up on them. They will eventually take the hint. If they don’t and ask you point blank, you will have to tell them that while you love them, as a practicing Catholic, you don’t want your child to see their life-style as acceptable—plain and simple.

Sometimes love isn’t nice, but it’s always the right thing.

Fr. Vincent Serpa, O.P.

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