Should I reply?


A couple of months ago, I sent an email and Facebook message to the Vocation’s Director of the order I am most interested in, and never heard back from her. Last night, I checked my Facebook and received a message from her, saying for me to contact her via email about my inquiry. The trouble is, as some of you know, I have felt less called to the religious life in the past month, and through various things that have occurred, I really think it’s best if I wait until I’ve made my profession of faith to really begin researching/contacting orders. And yet, I’m torn. If anyone can offer any kind of advice, or whether or not I should contact her, I would be so appreciative. Thank you all so much! :slight_smile:


I say contact her. Generally speaking, there’s the thought that one would need to wait at least two years after converting to Catholicism before being able to even enter formation anyway. She will most likely tell you this, if she doesn’t know the situation already.

As to why you should contact her, I think that it’s better to know than to wonder about something, so long as it’s not harmful to yourself or others (i.e. it’s not sinful). They’re not going to bury you with mail, they’re not going to call your house. Vocations directors are there to work with you at your pace, your convenience, and most of all your will. If you decide that you are not being called to that particular order, or perhaps a different vocational state entirely, they’re not going to beat you over the head for it.

God can’t move a parked car. :thumbsup:

(and because it may be relevant to my credibility, I have a decent amount of experience with both diocesan and religious vocations directors)


You should reply and tell her what you told us, you are reconsidering until after you have made your profession of faith.



I say yes because it is part of the journey you are taking in this life. I would tell her exactly what you posted here. It’s okay in what you are feeling, discuss it and be honest. It is only a conversation. You do not have to make any rash decisions that day when you speak with her. It might help you, it might not. But do it anyways. You never know what you might get out of it. I will pray for you, that whatever decisions you make in your life, it is geared towards God. :thumbsup:


You sound very sure that at this time, you are not interested in pursuing a religious life. I would say the same thing in an email response to this director. Continue receiving instruction and grow in the faith. You have time…there is no rush. Wait it out a year and see where you are with it at that time.


Have you anything to lose by it? It seems not. Rather, it seems as though you have quite much to gain, even if you decide against vowed religious life, such as prayers, spiritual direction, and a connection to the deeper life of the Roman Catholic Church.

I would recommend responding just as you spoke here, letting it be known that you have deferred your decision, but remain quite open to continuing to communicate. You never know quite what might happen.

God bless.


Dear quiet singer,

  I don't have much to add to what other posters have already said, however I would just add that while you may wish to defer any further discernment for a while, (and of course beginning discernment takes a while also) that that being said........

You have nothing to lose by emailing her and explaining what you have said here, and most especially asking for her prayers. She will appreciate hearing from you, and you will no doubt appreciate the prayers.

You are not committed in any way but as a courtesy she will probably like to hear from you, especially since she did respond back to your initial inquiry.

Blessings on your journey,

Sr. Debbie OSC


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