So I'm getting married to a wonderful guy. I can go on and on about him but that's for another thread. I'm currently in the middle of getting my annulment from my first marriage done.
Here's the back story:
I was 19 when I got married (clerks office, not church). In reality, I didn't want to because I wanted to wait a long engagement (wait until I graduated college). But he was very manipulative, stating "if you don't marry me now, I will kill myself" and other stuff. He said that if we do, we'll have the big wedding later on. So I went ahead and did it but he insist that I should continue to stay with my parents and his at his parents. Yeah I know, very stupid on our parts. Hey, I was very naive and vulnerable during that time.
I quickly regretted the decision and wanted to get an annulment or divorce but he kept on threatening me saying if I leave him, he's going to tell my family what we did. Then he got arrested for petty larceny for something that happened at his job. At that moment, I told my family about what happened. But after he got out of jail, he disappeared. I tried to get the address for his family but they won't (his whole family hates me because of my ethnicity). Without an address, I have no way to send my divorce papers to him.
About 4 years later, as I was using a background check on a guy I was dating (hey I needed to be careful), I decided to check if I could find my estranged husband. And I did. Then I set the divorce in motion. I was surprised that I got a response back. The divorce didn't take long because in New York, you can file a no-fault divorce (both agreeing and not settling things like houses, money, or kids). I just wanted to close that chapter in my life.
Not so fast... fast forward 6 years later (aka the present). My boyfriend of 2 years proposes to me. We were talking about where we should have our wedding and suggested his home parish would be great. I started to attend Mass with him and his family and felt at home. But we both knew we can't meet up with the priest until my mistake from 11 years ago was solved. I got to the annulment questionnaire (it's for Lack of Canonical Form) last weekend and filled almost everything out. But when they asked about places we've lived, this is where I'm stuck.
So it goes back to my question... should I write a letter explaining everything I just stated to everyone here? I want to be clear that the farce known as my 1st marriage was never valid. My mom recently said that I should just forget about it and find a JOP to marry us (she converted to a Non-Denominational Christian). It's already tough to endure my family criticizing for returning to Catholicism, but the annulment process takes it a few more notches. All I want is to marry the man I love in the eyes of our family, friends, and most importantly God and his Church. :bighanky: