Should my Parents have Married?


This thread starts off from my comments on another thread, I’m intrested to see other peoples views on this as its an issue amongst many in the youth groups i’ve been apart of…

My father is Bhuddist and my mother is Catholic, both strong in thier beliefs…

They have been happily married for around 22 years with three children…

We were more apart of the chritian relegion, but we were still apart of bhuddist one too…

Should they have married? What is really important in a marriage?


What do you believe the PURPOSE of marriage to be?

The answer to that question is central to the question you pose.


lol well me personally, i dont beleive in marriage, perhaps maybe i will have a long term partner, it would be nice. but the concept of marriage is pointless to me. i thinks its a waste of money and time, just go down to the leagle offices and get a piece of paper signed and use the money saved to start an enjoyable life for your self.

That said if my long term partner would like me to have a traditional korean shaman marriage ceremony to please her parents, and i see my self bieng only with that person untill the day i die, i would have no quams with it…

My mother hasn’t discussed marriage with me, but if she would like me to have one with a priest I would also do the same to please my parents…

And my father would be happy with what my mother is happy with…


In your case, I see no reason why your parents should not have gotten married. For many couples, a difference in religious beliefs can cause major strife for them, but it seems that your parents have been able to work through any problems of that nature. If you look at marriage from the perspective of the Catholic Church, its main role as a sacrament is to help build the church by raising children as members of God’s family. Your parents, as you have said, have been married 22 years and raised 3 children. The commitment they have shown then to the sanctity of marriage is proof that they have every reason to be married, and if anyone says that they shouldn’t be married (just based on the information you gave us) I would have to disagree.


You didn’t answer my question.

What is the **purpose **of marriage?


It has no purpose i can see… But thinking about it lets see… I guess humans desire ownership and that can extend to partners as well… So perhaps it is a ceremony of ownership… I beleive in the past most marriages were polygamist with one man owning many women… This concept of marriage could have derived from the past from men claiming women as territory, and perhaps sanctifying it under whatever diety they beleived at the time…

That seems like marriages original purpose, ownership of women… But now equal rights have come in and things have changed… So thinking about what marriage is now… I’m sure it still retains the elements of ownership but this time for both a man and a woman…

Outside of a concept of ownership I can’t imagine a purpose for marriage. I think raising children, but that can be done without married couples by single parents and same sex parents.

Oh financial benifits, leagelly i’m sure there would be sevaral positives to marriage. So a purpose of marriage may be to aquire the leagll benifits that come with it, tax, medical and other spuosal benifits…

Ok so on thought - marriages purposes - ownership and leagel benifits… Everthing else can be achieved without marriage


I guess another question arrises here… Is the concept of marriage owned solely by the catholic church…


The purpose of marriage is the sanctification of the spouses and the begetting and raising up of children in the Faith. The end of marriage is union with God in heaven.

As a Catholic, that purpose should have shaped **every **decision your mother made regarding whom to marry.

Based on what you have posted here and in other threads, it seems it didn’t.

As a Catholic, that was her obligation. So, with the purpose of marriage being to raise a Catholic family and the mutual sanctification of the spouses, I think choosing a Bhuddist husband was unwise.

It doesn’t seem that you were raised in the Catholic faith. Your beliefs are quite confused. That would seem to be the product of being raised in a religiously confused household.


God is the author of marriage. Between the baptized it is a Sacrament. Between those not baptized it is a natural state only.


A Catholic can obtain a dispensation to marry a Buddhist easily enough.

If your parents have been happy all these years, and have three children to bless their union, why are you questioning whether or not they should have gotten married? They are married, and making it work. It’s not up to you to decide that suddenly they should not be.

The importance of marriage? If it is as you claim that you don’t see its importance, all the talking to you about it is not going to do any good. You’re not in a place to really listen at this time.


Sadly enough this has become “easy.” It should not be. It is a very real danger to the soul of the Catholic and their children.

The subject came up tangentially on another thread. Not this specific question, but the discussion of marriage and religious differences.


What happens to my mother as a consequence?

Does she go to hell?

Becuase all three of her well educated children are irrelegious… Out of no fault of her own, for me personally and my brother it was our logic and education… My little brother is to young to make any real stand point but i would be surprised if he is relegious…

But whatever our fates may be, what is the consequence for “failing in her duty” as a catholic…


That is something for your mother to discuss with her Priest.


For her it’s a non issue. She respects all beliefs and thinks they are all equally valid. So she wouldn’t even care, they both go to temple and they both go to church.

I was just wondering what the catholic churches official position may be.


Yes, she will have to answer for her failures at the particular judgment, as will we all.

Regarding the eternal consequences, that depends entirely upon her-- mortal sin requires full knowledge and free will.


Becuase all three of her well educated children are irrelegious… Out of no fault of her own, for me personally and my brother it was our logic and education…

**What a condescending bunch of nonsense. **

But whatever our fates may be, what is the consequence for “failing in her duty” as a catholic…

**You should be more worried about your own soul… then when you clean up your self you can help others. If you had any religious formation at all - which I doubt… it was hardly part of your high education - you would know what the Bible says:
To help your memory: Jesus Christ the Lord our Saviour said: “No one comes to the Father except through Me. I am the Door… I am the Way, the Truth and the Life.” It also teaches that Christ is the Resurrection, our Hope, and that people who dont know Him dont know the Truth and the Life.
They may be partly informed about truth through their humanity and on a higher level again, the Jewish people are still the chosen ones of God… But heathen gods are idols. If you dont believe in the one true God you break the first commandment.

More so for your consideration. who will pay for your sins if you reject Yeshua, the Lamb of God, because you see your self as wise in your own thoughts and sufficient to pay for your own life? I have met many atheists who were knowlegable… but I have met no one who was wise or knew how to live according to the greatest command of Love. What is love to an atheist but an idea, a feeling, a psychological stirring of brain activity… … But to us God is Love and without Him we all fail. Including you.
He has not forgotten you but waits for you everyday to repent and believe.

As for your mother. We dont judge her because only God knows her heart and what brought her to the point that she decided to marry a man who did not love the Lord and that she, on top of this, did not fill her Catholic duty to raise her children to become children of God through Christ. That is a mothers holiest call and its part of the call to divine love.
As its written: what does it merit a man to win the whole world but pay with his soul?


Before I continue to read your response I would like to mention that I am progressing to helping others. I have moved from a Design Degree at RMIT to a Science Degree in Melbourne University into a Medical Degree at Melbourne University.

With my lifes purpose and goal being to further and better humanity.

So I am helping others in the best way I know how, with my intellect.


No I was absolutely serious. I questioned everything I beleived in from a young age. And it was through my education that i learned about how the world really work. And then i naturally figured out how silly many things were. All the paradoxes, other world releligions and after many years came to the current state I am at now. If i was illogical, unintelligent and uneducated I doubt i would have come at the same conclusion.


Well, all of us ignorant, irrational, uneducated Catholics will just stay here, content in our blithering idiocy - okay.

You might want to do some study, and learn that if it were not for the Catholic Church, the university system that “educated” you would not exist.

May God rescue from your arrogance.


Yes but she loved her children to death, and she raised them to be all that they can be, and i appreciate my mother so much that i would battle Fenris for her, gladly…

I find it intresting that I hear this common response, don’t do this don’t do that or you may go to hell. Then just say only the lord can judge. Well if the Lord is a fair judge I doubt he would send anyone to eternal damnation even child rapists and murders don’t deserve that…

Look either the church knows my mothers fate for raising her children catholic and bhuddist, not homeschooling us so as to ruin any possible contribution we could make to humanity, and in turn failing in her duty as a catholic, or they don’t. If they don’t she may as well have because it turned out for hte greater good…

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